View Full Version : A Moonlighting Muse. Adult, 1,500

November 7th, 2014, 03:30 AM
Here it is, almost the end of the year, cold as hell outside and with three feet of snow. I haven't seen my muse for the last three months. This morning I received a drunken phone call from her. She wants to see me.

She wants to see me? I sure as hell want to see her. What the devil am I paying her for? That's what I wonder as I take an elevator to the fifteenth floor of the apartment house we share. And I would pick the exact time Henry Hippo and his wife are coming back from a shopping trip. The elevator is full of hippos and packages. I can only hope Henrietta doesn't mistake me for a purchase or ... worse ... inadvertently step on me.

Luckily, they get off on the fourteenth, leaving me alone to take a few deep breathes before exiting on the fifteenth.

My muse, a lovely though only six-inch-high Oriental yum-yum, lives at the end of the corridor with her companion, a pretty reddish eight-inch bi-sexual demon. The apartment is easy to find. All I have to do is follow the sounds of Salsa music, an almost tangible wall of noise. Damn, I think, can they be partying this early in the morning?

Knocking does no good, so I have to search for my key. Once inside, I find a party in full swing. It must have recently started because an end-table is still piled high with marijuana and several bottles of booze look to be barely touched. Also, everyone is dressed except for Ellie Elephant, and she rarely wears clothing.

The heat from a dozen red-hot demons causes asbestos flooring to smoulder, filling the room with the smell of brimstone. Three demons, probably feeling the cold, are busily tearing up a table to add to a small bonfire in one corner.

I don't see my muse anywhere, though her significant-other is in a corner smooching with Fannie Fox.

"Out! Out! All of you. Get out of here," I shout after turning off a CD player. Wiping sweat off my brow with a sleeve, I pull Jin the demon off Fannie and toss the smouldering -- in more ways than one -- fox out the door. From the corners of my eyes, I see angry demons blink out of existence; probably back to hell to sleep it off.

Ellie gives me a simpering smile as she thunders past and into the corridor. In a few minutes, the place empties and I can pour water on the smoking bonfire. That's all I need, I think, to pay for remodelling that apartment.

"What's the matter, Charlie?" Jin whimpers while trying to get a hand into my pants. "Can't we have fun?"

"Where's Kimiko?" I pull her tiny hand out of my trousers. "And what's going on here?"

"We're celebrating our trip to Cancun," she replies. "It was a blast." Probably noticing the look on my face, she adds, "Don't worry. We won't charge you. A guy we know named Dickie paid for the whole thing. We've spent months on research at his home in Mexico. It was for your benefit."

"Dickie who?"

"The old government guy. You know him. He made billions off those wars. He can afford it."

"Where's she at ... Kimiko?"

Jin the demon smiles, pointing to the bedroom.

I find Kimiko in there with what looks like the entire Roaring Aardvark biker gang from down the block. The smell of sex is overpowering as I shovel aardvarks off the bed and onto the floor, finally getting down to the diminutive muse, lying spread-out with a smile on her pretty face.

"Lo, boss," she mumbles, one eye open. "Cu'mon in. Alwas' room fer one more."

"You asked me to come up here. Now get your butt up and talk to me." I give her a glare, turn, and go back to the living room to put out the few remaining embers of the fire. Believe me, that booze is tempting, but I force myself to sit down.

Jin comes out of the kitchen in her underwear and eating a sandwich. She smiles up at me and tries to climb my leg to sit on my lap. I brush her off. I can't use the distraction of a demon on my lap. Sheesh! I wonder why I don't put an ad in the paper for a regular muse?

A few minutes later, Kimiko, primly dressed in a schoolgirl's costume, comes into the room with a smile. "Hi, boss. Sorry, boss--"

"Don't give me that 'sorry' crap. You and this trumpet almost burned the building down."

"Strumpet," from Jin, with a sexy giggle. "A trumpet is something you play with. You wanna play with me?" Puffs of dark smoke come out of her pretty ears. Real demons can do that, also out of other orifices -- like their noses.

"And ... and you, you trump ... strumpet. You shut up."

Kimiko, as usual, jumps onto my lap then up to my right shoulder to speak into my ear. A moment later, I feel hot breath in my other ear as Jin takes a seat on that side. At least the weight is balanced.

"Uh ... what were you doing in Mexico? You have to pay that bill on your own. I'm not paying."

"I told you. Dickie paid for everything. And we were working. Do you think it was all fun--"

"Of course it was fun, Jin. You don't do anything unless it's 'fun' or hurts someone," I reply.

I feel a hot but tiny kiss on my left cheek. "Awwww. Charlie. It's what us guys do, you know?"

"Don't I know it?" I pull away, turning my head and getting a cooler kiss on the right cheek.

"We were working, boss. I've got literally thousands of subjects from the trip for you to use.” Kimmie says. “Did you know Georgie the ex-bigshot guy gets the runs from tortillas?"

"He was there, too? I knew he was hiding someplace, but not where."

"Oh, yeah, boss. Both him and Dickie were there. I had my teenie-weenie camera with me, and Jin had her big old tape recorder. We have goodie, goodie, gooooodies."

"And even some with both of them in bed with female aardvarks," Jin whispers.

Now, I think, that puts a different dimension on the matter. Visions of front-page exposes fill my fertile mind, all with my byline at the top.

Jin must have been reading my mind, cause she pipes up with, "Our names, too, honey. We gotta get credit, too."

I'm brought down to earth. She's right. My only proof would be the words of a six-inch muse and an eight-inch demon. I can now imagine other front-pages with my picture ... along with those of legions of lawyers. I have to shudder.

At least, I realize, I can use the material masked as fiction. If any Writing Forums readers doubt the veracity of my stories, I can always send the demon and her paddles over to convince them, he-he-he.

As all those options go through my mind, I hear a commotion out in the hall, loud thumping and male voices. Someone pounds on the door.

"I'll get rid of them, Charlie, honey," Jin says, jumping down and running behind me toward the door. For a moment, I hear her arguing with male voices. Then she returns and retakes her seat. "The Dallas Cowboys, Kimmie. I told them to come back later."

"Since you're going to be busy," I ask Kimiko, "what is it you want to talk to me about?"

"Charlie, boss, honey mine, darl--"

"Out with it, girl. Buttering me up won't do you any good." I can tell, whatever it is, I won't like it.

"Well ... Oscar says...."

"Oscar says? Oscar Rat?" I jump to my feet, hearing the girls bounce off the floor around me. "Oscar? What's he got to do with anything?"

"He's sort'a.... He's my manager now," Kimiko tells me.

"Oscar's in the muse managing business? I can't believe it."

"Oh, No, silly! I, Jin and I, joined his temporary employment company, Rent-A-Rat, Inc?" She gives me another juicy kiss, this time on the corner of my mouth. "Not as a muse. You're the only one I'm gonna muse for, baby mine."

"Then what is that rodent hiring you for, if not musing?"

"He's starting a new business with us, called a 'doll house', where we can meet interesting people. Oscar says we don't have to stand on street corners, either," Kimiko tells me.

"And he knows people, he says, that would love to meet an eight-inch demon that owns her own whips." Jin gives me a fiery kiss on the cheek.

"Uh. Girls," I advise them. "Don't count on it. I'm going to have a nice long talk with that damned rat."

First, though, I consider on the way down to the floor I share with the Oscar Rat family, I feel I should have another talk ... with Oscar's wife. She might be interested in his new business venture.