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Bakslashjack
April 28th, 2013, 10:01 PM
How to make a hate pizza




By \Jack



First, let a long standing grudge preheat the oven. Next, coat a pan with a generous spray of prejudice. Arrange the dough perfectly into a round crust of despise. Use the ladle to spread the moxie mixed loathing over the abhorrence, try not to get any disdain on the edges. Add a thin layer of cold shredded disgust and its ready for the toppings.

Carefully arrange the anger so that every slice will have an equal amount of misanthropy. Crumble on two handfuls of ground racism along with a third handful of chauvinism, made by mixing one part misandry and two parts misogyny. Then blanket the whole thing with a thick layer of spite and put it in the oven.

Set the temperature to three hundred and fifty degrees of furious burning rage. Let the layers of disgust and spite melt into hostility until the detestment is scorn to a golden brown. Malignantly pull it from the oven with repulsion and let the repugnance fester in its own animosity for a few minuets before removing it from the pan with violent execration. Bitterly pie cut the virulence into 12 even triangle slices of resentment. Serve it up hot with malice aforethought, and enjoy.

lowprofile300
April 29th, 2013, 03:23 PM
How to make a hate pizza




By \Jack



First, let a long standing grudge preheat the oven. Next, coat a pan with a generous spray of prejudice. Arrange the dough perfectly into a round crust of despise. Use the ladle to spread the moxie mixed loathing over the abhorrence, try not to get any disdain on the edges. Add a thin layer of cold shredded disgust and its ready for the toppings.

Carefully arrange the anger so that every slice will have an equal amount of misanthropy. Crumble on two handfuls of ground racism along with a third handful of chauvinism, made by mixing one part misandry and two parts misogyny. Then blanket the whole thing with a thick layer of spite and put it in the oven.

Set the temperature to three hundred and fifty degrees of furious burning rage. Let the layers of disgust and spite melt into hostility until the detestment is scorn to a golden brown. Malignantly pull it from the oven with repulsion and let the repugnance fester in its own animosity for a few minuets before removing it from the pan with violent execration. Bitterly pie cut the virulence into 12 even triangle slices of resentment. Serve it up hot with malice aforethought, and enjoy.



@Bakslashjack, It's actually quite good. It came across like a poem to me though, but I enjoyed it. Cheers

Mieksta
May 22nd, 2013, 09:55 PM
hmm, hatefully delicious?

TinyDancer
May 22nd, 2013, 10:22 PM
this was wonderfully imaginative and I proper-enjoyed your use of all hate-related words. especially when you said scorn to a golden brown, but through through was a very clever combination of words, inspiring and enjoyable and fun! thank you

Aiyooona
May 23rd, 2013, 04:19 AM
I like it! kinda seems like a poem... but i really like it!

hamster892
May 23rd, 2013, 11:58 AM
scorn to a golden brown.


I love it when verbs are used in new ways like this. I'm picturing someone making a delicious pizza while seething with rage. You think this is how Hulk eats on Friday nights?

Bakslashjack
June 18th, 2015, 06:22 AM
lol, I forgot all about this. Started out a little weak, but I caught myself smiling halfway through it.

Joe_Bassett
August 5th, 2015, 04:59 AM
Despite all the negativity I found myself smiling at the clever wordplay (that's a word, I think?). It does come off as poetic to me like something found in a collection of less serious poems (like Shel Silverstein's collections).

Now excuse me, I'm off to bake a hate pizza. :icon_cheesygrin:

Courtjester
December 7th, 2015, 03:29 PM
Hair-raising cuisine. I liked it but hope it hasn't put me off cooking for life. Cj

Tulip
December 18th, 2015, 03:01 PM
Haha! Very clever.

Hairball
December 19th, 2015, 06:59 AM
I like it! Good job!

Mythsfade
March 8th, 2016, 12:58 AM
I must say, I really enjoyed reading this. Sounds delicious ;)

sigmadog
March 26th, 2016, 12:41 AM
Love it. Wonderful imagery using words in unexpected and amusing ways.

Also, I'm hungry.

SenileBeagle
May 21st, 2016, 07:54 AM
I might have enjoyed this had I not been on a Steady Diet of Hate Pizzas for the past eight to ten years.


As it stands, I am thoroughly SICK of being hated. It's colored my world black. Taken away my laugh. Taken away my smile. Figuratively, hate has singlehandedly taken away my will to live in the literary world.


I HATE hate.


How about a big batch of LOVE INSTEAD?


One part kisses
One part hugs
A dash of kindness
Sprinkle with forgiveness
Bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes

Shirl the Whirl
June 17th, 2016, 09:09 PM
Enjoyed all of this, but my favourite line was, "let the repugnance fester in it's own animosity".