View Full Version : "Chosen" - Synopsis

April 16th, 2012, 08:35 PM
Hello, this is the first proper thread other than an introduction that I've made, so sorry if I messed up :P

I have recently started working on a sci-fi novel, I havn't gotten very far yet but I just wanted to post a short synopsis of the story and see what you guys think. :)

Four girls are chosen to help fight in an on going war between "our world and the next". It is unknown when the next world will strike again but new attacks are always a threat.

The four girls are unwillingly taken from their homes to be trained. Training includes increasing pain thresholds and fighting, occasionally to the death.

As the girls become closer secrets from their pasts are revealed and bonds are made that could ruin plans. As battles increase and the big war draws nearer, it becomes unclear if they are fighting for the right side and the girls must choose their priorities.

Just a little bit more info for you guys; Chosen is all about inner strength and the girls have all be chosen based on theirs. As well as learning to fight they also learn how strong the are. The point of the story is more the reasons why the girls were chosen to fight rather than the fighting they do, although that is a big part.

This is a working progress but I would like to know what you think of the idea. Is this something you think could be interesting, would you read it? Do you have any advice or any questions? Any feed back would be appreciated!

Once I have written a little more I will post small extracts.


April 16th, 2012, 09:09 PM
It sounds like a mix of "Enders Game" and "The Hunger Games.". Both of which I loved. So, if it's executed well, I'd read it. Good luck..

April 16th, 2012, 09:11 PM
It sounds like a mix of "Enders Game" and "The Hunger Games.". Both of which I loved. So, if it's executed well, I'd read it. Good luck..

I haven't read them but they seem to be popular, so I will take that as a compliment. Thankyou for your opinions. :)

April 16th, 2012, 09:14 PM
I think it should be a requirement that all aspiring sci-fi novelists read Enders Game. Just my opinion though. It's an awesome book.

April 17th, 2012, 08:13 PM
These four girls alone? Or are there others who are chosen, however only the four survive? Or something... I guess the concept, which of course is only a synopsis, lacks a few details I'd need to be interested in reading. I've always had problems with the whole "there are 7 billion people, but these were chosen from methods so extremely unlikely and most likely unsuccessful" type of thing. Maybe if there were tests done for all citizens, or something - that'd make more sense to me. The whole "we just knew it would be the four of you" is just kind of... "Let's hope the audience believes what we're talking about!"

The concept of the next world vs this world is kind of cool. I'm not sure how it works, if they're futuristic or just other-dimension types, but it's a thought that could get me interested, were other things hammered out.

April 18th, 2012, 02:36 PM
mmmm.............. The idea sounds interesting. But perhaps it would be better if you could slightly elaborate on this choosing process , how these girls are chosen and if there were or are others chosen too.
Anyway , if you can get the story together, I will certainly read it.

April 18th, 2012, 07:10 PM
I have to agree with Riverdog that, before I'd even finished reading the synopsis, I was instantly thinking Orson Scott Card and the Ender series; in particular the progression Bean's character made compared to Ender.

There is room for more tales of this nature in the story-space, but I'd be careful. I would certainly read the first couple books of Ender up to Children of the mind, and at least the first book of the Bean series by OSC to make sure you're not treading down too similar a path. And, since it seems your work is going to be compared to his, you might as well be prepared to discuss it! lol

Edit: Ugh! I tried to walk away without saying this, but I have to edit and paste it in:

You really need to read more Science Fiction if you're going to write it. I know it may seem like a quick judgment to make since I hardly know you. But you haven't read the Ender series, which would be like not reading the Foundation series by Asimov, or the N-space works by Niven, Dune by Herbert, etc. These are the surface of science fiction, and like an iceberg there is so much more under the surface that reading the works of the most popular authors is probably a minimal baseline.

To avoid the cliche and tired storylines in any genre you have to know what they are. I have four bookshelves of scifi/fantasy novels in line of sight right now, and beside them are several smaller bookshelves with hundreds (about 80%) of the Analog, Asimov and OnSpec magazines from between 1971-now. I won't be happy until I backfill my Analog back to the start! My obsession with short fiction might be a bit more intense than most, but only by a degree.

Instant parallels will constantly be developed between what you write and what's gone before, and if you submit a synopsis or book chapter(s) to a SciFi publisher, you can be judged within paragraphs if not sentences.

I don't say all this to discourage you, or belittle your idea. Quite the opposite. I think your story has a unique thread to it worth exploring, and I hope to encourage you to avoid a pitfall that is especially serious in scifi. As readers, we're hyper-critical unforgiving bastards! That being said, we're also incredibly willing to give new writers a go, and audiences will always be available to you online and in books/magazines. Our appetite is insatiable!

If you're serious about entering this genre a healthy knowledge of what's come before is a must. It's as important to your craft as any sort of grammar; maybe more so, because an editor is more likely to work on the grammar of a fresh idea than a gramatically correct cliche.

Ok, /rant. I would love to see a chapter, preferably something foundational, as this idea does really interest me. Good luck and hope to see more soon!

April 18th, 2012, 08:29 PM
Thankyou guys, this is a working progress so you may all have to bear with me a little. I will look into the Ender books.

The process these girls have been chosen is not like the hunger games in the sense that there was lots of people and out of all of them only these four survived. It's hard to explain now but will become clearer in the book I hope, but although not physically strong these girls have incredible inner strength which is said to be alot stronger and they are taught how to use it etc.

It does need alot of work and I am new to this, so I do ask for patience. Although I do not read a lot of Sci-Fi I do watch it. Once I have some more written I will post a little.

I do also want to point out that although this story has a Sci-Fi theme, is isn't necessarily just aimed at Sci-Fi fans, I would like to compare it to "Buffy the vampire slayer" as although it is considered Sci-Fi, alot of viewers aren't Sci-Fi fans, if that makes sense.

I see the story aimed at teenage girls and for it to help them discover their own inner strength. In the story the girls use their inner strength to fight a war with demons etc. but in real life girls everywhere use their inner strength to fight every day life. So the story is almost a metaphor?

Like I said, it does need work, and I am still figuring it out myself. At the moment the whole this is a very rough draft. But I do appreciate your comments.


Before I posted this I did a little research on the Ender series and can see some similarities. Perhaps it is is a kind of cross between this and Buffy. Like most things, there will always be something similar that came before it but I will hopefully have ways to set it apart.

Also, as I am still setting out the story myself, I probably haven't explained it very well. I will explain it a little better and post a chapter or two soon. :)

Again, although it has a Sci-Fi setting, these girls also talk about very real problems and have very real relationships. I think some people will like the "realness" parts of the story, and some will enjoy the Sci-Fi gory battles.