View Full Version : He ate like a pig.

February 14th, 2012, 04:55 AM
The big burly man got out of the Smart car. He had slick black hair that looked as if it had been oiled way to much. He had a long full beard that spanned down his chest giving the impression he hadn't shaved in years. As he walked to his favorite restaurant, waves of fat flowed up and down his body.

He made it to the door of the restaurant and rested. Obviously, he could hardly lug around over five hundred pounds of fat.

Hungrily, the huge man opened the door to the grease pit, KFC. He slowly made his toward the counter where the cashier was trying his hardest not to vomit.

"May I help you?" the cashier asked, giving the man a sick smile.

"I'll have a large box of popcorn chicken and large box of drumsticks... You know...scratch that, I'll just have two of everything." Although he was so large and burly, his voice squeaked as if he had breathed in a lot of helium.

The obese man paid and sat down. His fat hid the tiny chair. The wooden chair looked very stresses under hundreds of pounds of weight.

Half an hour later, all the workers brought out the massive order. It literally took all the people who worked there to carry all the food to him. Three tables of food were laid out before him.

He first went after the drumsticks. Grease dribbled down his chin. He hungrily devoured them all and looked into the tub only to see a pool of grease resting at the bottom. He put the tub to his libs and drained it. All the fat trickled down his throat.

The man reached for the mashed potatoes and gravy. He glopped them into his mouth, and they too were soon gone.

The man pushed a bowl of steamed broccoli out of the way, so he could reach the popcorn chicken. He reached for one and popped it in his mouth, savoring the mixture of fried chicken, salt, and soggy batter.

Families around him fought an urge to barf, and they gave him constant disapproving looks as he drained plate after plate of food.

His beard was caked in grease and drips of fat fell from it.

Now, I'd better stop describing this before I barf all over my keyboard, but you get the gist of it. This guy ate like a pig.


(Dedicated to my friend who can't stand anything to do with KFC)

(I wasn't sure if I should put this under horror or not ;))