PDA

View Full Version : Prompts and word games chat



The Backward OX
September 26th, 2010, 10:23 PM
http://www.writingforums.com/images/misc/quote_icon.png Originally Posted by Danvok http://www.writingforums.com/images/buttons/viewpost-right.png (http://www.writingforums.com/lm-poetry-challenge/115227-heroic-couplet.html#post1383969)
As the mighty sun, in the distance, crept
From its warm sunrise to a cold sunset

================================

That works doesn't it?

I incline to the belief that when he said, "we write a poem by each contributing an heroic couplet," he meant that each successive poster would add two lines to those preceding, and thereby build the poem in their own post.

The Backward OX
September 29th, 2010, 12:12 AM
Except that you got around it by going back to the original premise. That's not fair! And besides, 'stuff' and 'kids' don't really fit with the picture created in the first lines, of an earlier time when language was more correct.

Olly Buckle
September 29th, 2010, 09:46 AM
Like your Dad used to say Ox, "Life isn't fair, live with it." Anyway, I did not go back, I stayed with. In my head the next couple of lines will be about what the weather was like and then another couple about the counting, to build up the idea. Also that was the picture you created from what I wrote, I was actually thinking of the Walrus and the Carpenter, they are from an earlier time admittedly, but the reason I was with them was because The heroic couplet might work quite well for comic or nonsense verse of a certain type. So stop getting all "Chuckie bum" about it, as a certain Ms. Sommers might put it, and give us a couplet to work with.

Olly Buckle
September 30th, 2010, 11:31 AM
Was a, farmer. took a. These don't sound like iambs to me, I think they are the reverse, with the heavy stress on the first syllable. That is a trochee.

The Backward OX
September 30th, 2010, 12:30 PM
Told you I can't write poetry.

caelum
September 30th, 2010, 05:05 PM
It's entirely possible that stresses vary by country, I forgot about that. Just as sounds vary, like how the English pronounce saw the same way we pronounce dinosaur. Reminds me of how when French people or when any other-language people learn English, their stresses are all in funny places.

The Backward OX
October 1st, 2010, 02:31 AM
Very kind of you, KLM, to talk of regional stresses, but the fault is mine. I just tweaked two lines from the old song "Sweet Violets." Or, as it was sung, Sweet Viii-oh-lets. Of course, there's also a parody version, but this is a family forum.

Olly Buckle
October 2nd, 2010, 03:23 PM
Told you I can't be bothered to write poetry.You left a bit out, It is like you tell people writing fiction, if you want to do it you have to read it. Now, only guessing, but my feeling is that you are not much of a hearts and flowers man, so go and read some Kipling for a starter, he wrote loads of it.

The Backward OX
October 2nd, 2010, 03:45 PM
Look mate, I’ll need to put a boy on, just to keep up. I’ve got a lame duck here, two actually, now I think about it, I’m doing private crits for budding novelists, I’m trying to get a long short knocked into shape - which hasn’t been looked at for two days - there's unread library books overdue, and you’re suggesting I Kipple as well. You’re a better man than I am, Gunga Din.

Olly Buckle
October 2nd, 2010, 08:33 PM
Oh well "East is east and west is west" but "If" ...

Olly Buckle
October 31st, 2010, 06:50 PM
I posted in the Bard's bistro and then thought this board deserves it's own chat thread, so here we are.

Olly Buckle
October 31st, 2010, 06:52 PM
The limerick thread is flying a bit at the moment, great fun to read through as well as participate. Baron has pointed out to me that it might be to our advantage to bring our comments here, in the bard's bistro, and looking through I think he is right, they tend to interrupt the flow, even when people are considerate enough to put them between limericks.

One thing that keeps cropping up is the rhythm and meter of the first couplet, people make the "don't be so uptight" sort of comment when others protest at errors. My personal take is that part of the purpose of challenges to get us to stretch our minds a little, and if you can't be bothered why bother spoiling the other four lines?
Anyway poets are supposed to be intense sort of people who get into things thoroughly.
What should be do is a different fish to fry (I love mixing metaphors).l liked Chester'sDaughter's "Beary love" and a suggested alternative, but it is the sort of thing that requires tact and care, and not all poets have these qualities.

Baron
October 31st, 2010, 06:58 PM
I don't know why people keep writing about poets on this forum as though they're some separate species. Writing poetry is something you do. "Poet" describes something that someone does, not what they are.

Gumby
October 31st, 2010, 07:03 PM
Maybe we could 'earn' a point each time we do the line correctly, then when the member reaches a set number of points, a limerick star is awarded ( or some such thing ). Of course, that requires someone to be in charge of what is correct. :-k Hmmmm, maybe not such a good idea.

Gumby
October 31st, 2010, 07:19 PM
Okay, here's another idea. A Limerick Contest, along the lines of the Poetry Challenge Contest. It could be on a weekly or monthly schedule, depending on interest. It would probably move much faster than the poetry contest, as limericks are shorter. They could be judged by members voting on which one adhered to the limerick rules as well as cleverness etc. This could help us all sharpen our limerick skills, along with just doing our original group limericks.

Olly Buckle
October 31st, 2010, 08:26 PM
I don't know why people keep writing about poets on this forum as though they're some separate species. Writing poetry is something you do. "Poet" describes something that someone does, not what they are.

Surely what one does infriges onto what one is, thus athletes tend to be fit, gluttons fat, bankers reasonably well off, etc. Poets use words in particular ways for a particular effect and notice connections often unobserved, they become sensitive to certain things. That does not seem unreasonable to me, in fact it is at the basis of this board, just as a karate fighter might harden himself by hitting a board bound with rice straw a poet might sensitise himself by trying one of the challenges in this board.

Baron
October 31st, 2010, 08:29 PM
It's a narrow view, Olly. Most people who write poetry do many other things as well, and always have, and many different types of people write poetry. Mohammed Ali wrote poetry. Byron hardly fits the picture of the sensitive poetic flower.

SilverMoon
October 31st, 2010, 08:47 PM
Up until a few weeks ago, I never really considered the limerick as a form of poetry. You know, the "dirty limerick thing" would come to mind. I've really enjoyed learning the pleasant, simple structure (aa bb a) and getting in touch with the "beat". I understand that there are more structures for the limerick. Would this be the place to explore them?

Baron
October 31st, 2010, 08:56 PM
Okay, here's another idea. A Limerick Contest, along the lines of the Poetry Challenge Contest. It could be on a weekly or monthly schedule, depending on interest. It would probably move much faster than the poetry contest, as limericks are shorter. They could be judged by members voting on which one adhered to the limerick rules as well as cleverness etc. This could help us all sharpen our limerick skills, along with just doing our original group limericks.

The poetry challenge died when it was part of LM, at least in part because there was too much confusion there with all the different challenges that were taking place. I'm reluctant to get too many different challenges going again until we see regular input to the main challenge again. If one of the winners suggested limericks as a theme for the main challenge there would be no objection from me.

Baron
October 31st, 2010, 08:58 PM
Up until a few weeks ago, I never really considered the limerick as a form of poetry. You know, the "dirty limerick thing" would come to mind. I've really enjoyed learning the pleasant, simple structure (aa bb a) and getting in touch with the "beat". I understand that there are more structures for the limerick. Would this be the place to explore them?

If you're talking about discussing various structures then you could do it here, in the Bistro or on the Poetry Discussion board.

If you want to post examples of different structures for feedback then the poetry forum is the place to do it.

SilverMoon
October 31st, 2010, 09:10 PM
Thanks Rob, I was kind of zeoring in on the limerick structures, thinking this might be the place to explore its facets being that this new thread is posted above the Limerick thread. But who knows? They may be being discussed in the Poetry Discussion board, a venue I don't often explore but should.

Olly Buckle
October 31st, 2010, 11:58 PM
boo Boo boo boo boo boo boo Booboo
stuttered the ghost in search of a loo
but his haunting got hindered

This is what is currently "in play" compare with a classic limerick.

There was an old man with a beard
Who said it is just as I feared
Two owls and a wren

For me line two has the wrong rhythm, maybe something like
An old ghost said in search of a loo,
With two single syllable words at the start of the line
Line three looks too long to me, "Haunting was hindered" would make the necessary five syllables.

Baron
November 5th, 2010, 10:13 AM
I can understand the odd overlap but there's an instance in the limerick thread where someone picked it up with three previous posts already made and just recycled the same limerick. It isn't even as if it was a case of everyone posting at the same time because there was a half hour time lapse.

Olly Buckle
November 7th, 2010, 05:52 PM
One of ours first

Getting limericks right may seem easy.
But it's not, so please try to please me
With a well thought out word
and good timing's preferred
Just try not to make the lines cheesy

Then a classic one for comparison.

There was an old man with a beard
Who said it is just as I feared
Two owls and a hen
Three cocks and a wren
Have all made their nests in my beard

Then my suggestion,

Limerick writing may seem easy.
It isn't, so please try to please me
A well thought out word
Good timing's preferred
Try not to make it too cheesy

That makes the syllable count 8,8,5,5,8, assuming I have counted right.
I know, it was me wrote the first line with ten syllables, guilty as any. I plead the idea is to have fun and learn the discipline at the same time so now I am learning.

Co-incidentally I think losing words such as but, with and and makes for a stronger line.

The first line still feels clumsy, too many syllables in limerick to fit the rhythm so it needs splitting wri-ting, any suggestions, I was trying not to interfere with the rhyme.

Baron
November 7th, 2010, 06:34 PM
Limerick writing seems easy.
It isn't, so please try to please me
A well thought out word
Good timing's preferred
Try not to make it too cheesy

apple
November 18th, 2010, 06:10 PM
Concerning the limerick, the idea is to not only get the syllables, rhyme and word beat emphasis correct but also make each line work with the other, the last line, if possible, a clever or funny punch line that pulls it together. It really isn't that easy to build one, but as I've gotten more into the form I've realized that it each little element of the body of the limerick is important to make it successful. I'm still working on getting it right, and the thread is a lot of fun.
Question? If the first,second and fifth line have nine beats, how many beats is third and fourth? Still five or can there be six? Any set rules?

eeyore
January 24th, 2011, 03:34 AM
Limericks are all about timing
along with a fair bit of rhyming.
The rhymes can be hard
but have their reward
when sounding like samples so brilliant. :D

eeyore
January 24th, 2011, 03:36 AM
Oops...I think I put this in the wrong thread by mistake. Tried not to. Sorry.

Olly Buckle
January 24th, 2011, 10:17 AM
Seems like a reasonable place to me, where would be better?
How about:-
Limericks are all about timing
along with a fair bit of rhyming.
The rhymes can be hard
but have their reward
When the last line rounds off your scheming.

Apple, as far as I know lines three and four are always five silly bubbles, on the other hand this is a very recent form (in poetry terms recent), look at how the rhyming schemes and such have changed in sonnets over a period of five or six hundred years, and people are still using the old forms alongside the new. I think if you could make it work consistently any form could become accepted, isn't poetry about making it work rather than about rules? Within the limerick thread I encourage people to follow the set forms because that is more about practicing skills than about original creations, the originality comes from the eclectic mix of people contributing, hopefully.

eeyore
January 24th, 2011, 08:17 PM
I ended with a "non-rhyming" word on purpose. I was thinking "shining" could have been used. It was supposed to begin as an example of a limerick that was, at least, decent, and then end with a word that didn't rhyme, but that was a synonym for the last word. :D Oh well. My humor didn't pan out, but that's okay, too. :)

eeyore
January 24th, 2011, 08:23 PM
On a little different note, I strongly urged my kids (especially in prose writing) to learn the rules of grammar and form. I told them that once they knew the rules, that was when they could then break them. Then, they would be able to do it on purpose, to emphasize things, or change the meaning in some way, or any number of things like that. It wouldn't be something they would do in formal writing, but if they were writing a story (or writing a poem), it could be acceptable. I hope I wasn't confusing here. :)

Sir Roberts
February 20th, 2011, 02:36 AM
(Fun fact: I created a file on a find-a-roommate site recently and was quickly texted by a girl asking if I wanted to be a prostitute. Chuffed!)

Score!

The Backward OX
February 20th, 2011, 02:51 AM
Phooey. I clicked the Limerick thread. How did this finish up here?

Sir Roberts
February 28th, 2011, 01:03 AM
We're doomed. Doomed, I say!

Olly Buckle
February 28th, 2011, 11:14 PM
We're doomed. Doomed, I say!Talk about stating the obvious.

Olly Buckle
March 5th, 2011, 12:41 PM
And his silly-bubble count went 8,8,5,5,8

The Backward OX
March 5th, 2011, 12:47 PM
If I made a comment like that I'd have my post deleted. It's a black-fella's bum.

Sir Roberts
March 5th, 2011, 03:00 PM
If anyone is immune to the whims of the mods, Mr Ox, it would be you.

Baron
March 5th, 2011, 05:14 PM
No immunity and no favourites.

Sir Roberts
March 5th, 2011, 05:42 PM
Make it so.

Olly Buckle
March 5th, 2011, 09:49 PM
Some thing's happening, I posted that about the syllable count in the limerick thread after the line about Edward Lear; and it brought Ox here earlier.

Liked the one about the King's stutter.

The Backward OX
March 6th, 2011, 12:51 AM
Lack of site maintenance is the problem, Olly. Someone should do something. Like send the boss a PM.

Gumby
March 6th, 2011, 06:00 PM
Some thing's happening, I posted that about the syllable count in the limerick thread after the line about Edward Lear; and it brought Ox here earlier.

Liked the one about the King's stutter.


Lack of site maintenance is the problem, Olly. Someone should do something. Like send the boss a PM.


Okay, I'm pretty sure it was the "boss" who moved them all here, if you guys are serious about wondering how your posts ended up here. If not, and you're simply having fun, then ignore this post...it never happened. :)

The Backward OX
March 7th, 2011, 10:35 AM
http://www.writingforums.com/images/misc/quote_icon.png originally posted by Hawke http://www.writingforums.com/images/buttons/viewpost-right.png (http://www.writingforums.com/catfish-soup/118967-interview-backward-ox.html#post1413826)

what would your ideal career be, if you couldn't be a writer?
A professional assassin; I’d start by disposing of all owners/operators of websites who act like god.;)

Baron
March 7th, 2011, 11:01 AM
From the website owners' survival manual:

Dealing with would-be assassins -

http://thanasis.com/zmadmb.jpg

The Backward OX
March 17th, 2011, 01:28 AM
It's easy to see who gives these things some thought...

Baron
March 17th, 2011, 01:50 AM
It's easy to see who gives these things some thought...

You certainly didn't give much thought to syllable count or rhythm - or where you posted your comment.

Of course that's a complete aside to the fact that you were posting the same line as the previous poster; in this case, me.

The Backward OX
March 17th, 2011, 02:30 AM
Of course that's a complete aside to the fact that you were posting the same line as the previous poster; in this case, me.
Of course that makes no allowance for the facts that certain people, when viewing comments about Earth's gyration, are inevitably reminded of the present westward movement towards Russia of the Earth's Magnetic North Pole, and that such people then go seeking through their mind for a word that's both indicative of the consequences of such movement and also rhymes with gyration, rather than just posting an off-the-cuff and low-brow comment about an irritable bovine.

Baron
March 17th, 2011, 02:33 AM
Of course that makes no allowance for the facts that certain people, when viewing comments about Earth's gyration, are inevitably reminded of the present westward movement towards Russia of the Earth's Magnetic North Pole, and that such people then go seeking through their mind for a word that's both indicative of the consequences of such movement and also rhymes with gyration, rather than just posting an off-the-cuff and low-brow comment about an irritable bovine.

Well perhaps if you'd given a little more thought to it you could have applied a rhythm which fitted the limerick. *American accent* Just sayin'.

It would also appear that my line was quite prophetic.

Olly Buckle
March 20th, 2011, 06:12 AM
I posted a first line and then thought "Aarrgh, what rhymes with Jurassic?" finally came up with this:-

Dinosaurs lived through the Jurassic
Without the use of elastic
To hold up the drawers
Of those dinosaurs
They used something much more basic

Not my best I know.

BipBopRealGoodNop
March 31st, 2011, 06:08 PM
is this thread only for moderators? no-one else seems to have posted.

Anyhow, here's a limerick about Ken Dodd-

With Diddymen from Knotty Ash,
In his attic he stored lots of cash,
He took lots of persuasion,
When his tax evasion,
Caused him to pay tax in a flash.

Olly Buckle
April 2nd, 2011, 09:55 AM
is this thread only for moderators? no-one else seems to have posted.Do you really think we have curmudgeonly antipodeans on the staff? Nah, it's simply a thread for writers rather than debaters and loungers.:)

candid petunia
June 12th, 2011, 10:31 AM
I have my poetry exam next, in 2 weeks time. I saw The heroic couplet in the title, so I clicked. Have a doubt, the metres in poetry are a bit hard to recognise... I know the types, but recognition is something else. Iamb and trochee are fine. But I get confused if I am faced with spondee, anapest or dactyl.
I think I should add that I study in an open university, so I've had no one to teach me. Only study material.

Olly Buckle
June 13th, 2011, 09:54 PM
Firstly the Iamb, trochee etc. are not in themselves metres but feet, metre describes the basic pattern of the poem.
Secondly in the words which describe the number of feet in a line the spelling is -meter as in Pentameter.

That is such a common error an examiner will appreciate you getting it right.

A poem which is written in an iambic metre will not usually be entirely in iambic feet, inverting a foot or adding an extra syllable show emphasis and add life to the poem. Remember also although we say light stress and heavy stress for convenience sake there are of course all sorts of degrees of stress, these things are relative.

I am as self taught as you, probably more so as I am not following a syllabus, my initial reading on the subject was "Metre, rhythm and verse form" by Phillip Hobsbaum, which, to be honest, i found rather dry and a bit heavy going. I am now reading "The Anatomy of Poetry" by Marjorie Boulton, which I am finding much more accessible and enjoyable, probably a bit too late for your present exams but a good read nevertheless.

candid petunia
June 14th, 2011, 10:04 AM
I'll go and check out more poetry so I can understand better. Thanks, Olly. :)

Olly Buckle
July 8th, 2011, 10:46 PM
That Ken Dodd limerick fits the template beautifully, lots of people seem to have difficulty getting the rhythm of the form, I wonder if an aural example might help.
I looked on You-tube, most had lots of guff attached or were otherwise unsuitable, but I found this,

YouTube - ‪limerick #3‬‏ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdBbj8gN2V8)

Maybe someone can find other spoken examples, I would love to hear the original Edward Lear ones. That gives me an idea.

Olly Buckle
July 8th, 2011, 11:01 PM
See if you can hear the rhythm in these two, originals from Lear.

YouTube - ‪Another Limerick by Edward Lear‬‏ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvgBMpaL410)

YouTube - ‪A Limerick by Edward Lear‬‏ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZPNkiQM7II)

The rhythm in English is more subtle than the Ker-bonk Ker-bonk of the feet of classical poetry, there are so many more variations of stress than simply ‘strong’ or ‘weak’.
Traditionally they say it as dah dum variations, I hear that first line as:-

De-doodley dum-ditty-dum

Bloggsworth
August 27th, 2011, 05:47 PM
It was as a song fair to middling
In rogue to never mind and tingling

Sorry Nacian, but could you translate that last line please?

Nacian
August 27th, 2011, 05:50 PM
Is it not correct?
It is just mean the song is unique..it is just an expression.
I can change it if you like.

Bloggsworth
August 27th, 2011, 06:07 PM
I'm sorry, but it makes no sense at all - I know that English is not your first language, but if it doesn't make sense to me, I can't see how it makes sense to you. I would rather you looked at it and tried again, if I correct it for you without knowing what you meant to say, it will be what I am saying. In essence, the second line of a limerick should tell us what happens next, move the poem to the next stage, tell us why the song was only fair to middling - Of course, if you don't understand the expression fair to middling then you may, in part, be excused, but you could have googled it.

It was as a song fair to middling
just spoiled by inadequate fiddling

Nacian
August 28th, 2011, 02:54 PM
I met the bum at a coffee shop
He liked talking but just couldn't stop
He put down his brolls

Baron
August 28th, 2011, 03:45 PM
I met the bum at a coffee shop
He liked talking but just couldn't stop
He put down his brolls

I've pulled this from the Limerick thread because the last line makes no sense at all.

I notice that Nellie still hasn't managed to grasp the idea of meter in Limericks. This is a learning process and it might help both of you to read the linked thread and also search out some Limericks with Google and study the form.

What is a Limerick? (http://www.writingforums.com/poetry-prompts-word-games/123890-what-limerick-some-easy-guidelines.html)

Nacian
August 28th, 2011, 04:23 PM
Ok
There once was a lad from above
who kept writing up lines to his love
he looked here an there
andhe looked everywhere
but he just couldn't find his emerald

Is this anywhere near it??

For the last line sorry

I met the bum at a coffee shop
He liked talking but just couldn't stop
He made up a sound ??

Baron
August 28th, 2011, 04:44 PM
Ok
There once was a lad from above
who kept writing up lines to his love
he looked here an there
andhe looked everywhere
but he just couldn't find their armoured

Is this anywhere near it??

For the last line sorry

I met the bum at a coffee shop
He liked talking but just couldn't stop
He made up a sound ??

The last line in your complete limerick lets it down. It doesn't rhyme. It's certainly better and you've got the hang of the meter.

The last line in the second looks good to me.

Nacian
August 28th, 2011, 05:35 PM
Thank you Baron..
There once was a lad from above
who kept writing up lines to his love
he looked here an there
andhe looked everywhere
but he just couldn't wind up his rove

Baron
August 28th, 2011, 05:43 PM
Thank you Baron..
There once was a lad from above
who kept writing up lines to his love
he looked here an there
andhe looked everywhere
but he just couldn't wind up his rove

Much better.

Nacian
August 28th, 2011, 05:45 PM
Thank you very much Baron:-)

Baron
September 9th, 2011, 11:27 AM
The Limerick thread was once one of the most popular. I'd like to see it that way again. I know this may offend some but I think it's unfair that those who can't grasp the concept should spoil it for others. My suggestion is that if people post a line which doesn't fit the form, or that makes no sense, then people should disregard that post and continue from the last line which worked.

Olly Buckle
September 9th, 2011, 03:01 PM
I had noticed Nacian doing much better in the cinquain thread as well when I first came back. At their best I think these threads provide a useful introduction to some of the formal aspects of poetry. Some participants will always find a task harder than others, we are all different. Add to that there are some here for whom the concept of formal education is alien and others for whom English is not their native language and I am more inclined to applaud their attempts to join in and achieve understanding for themselves than I am to ignore it. Rather than disapproving their ignorance let's encourage their attempts at enlightenment, the initial task may be harder but the ultimate reward will be greater, and after all bending our minds to the task of conveying our thoughts clearly in a way people want to read is a large part of what most members here are in to.

Baron
September 9th, 2011, 03:36 PM
I had noticed Nacian doing much better in the cinquain thread as well when I first came back. At their best I think these threads provide a useful introduction to some of the formal aspects of poetry. Some participants will always find a task harder than others, we are all different. Add to that there are some here for whom the concept of formal education is alien and others for whom English is not their native language and I am more inclined to applaud their attempts to join in and achieve understanding for themselves than I am to ignore it. Rather than disapproving their ignorance let's encourage their attempts at enlightenment, the initial task may be harder but the ultimate reward will be greater, and after all bending our minds to the task of conveying our thoughts clearly in a way people want to read is a large part of what most members here are in to.

My method will get others using the thread again. Yours will result in only one or two posting. When people learn that they have to grasp the concept if they want to join in then there's an extra incentive to get it right if they want to play.

I'm repeating what I said before, that those who wish to get the thread moving again may ignore nonsensical posts or those which don't conform to the format and proceed from the last line which worked.

Olly Buckle
September 14th, 2011, 12:01 AM
then theirs and extra incentive 'there's' I think.

I am torn, is there a relative value to posts? Is this purely a matter of churning out the limericks? Do poor limericks and clever ones count for the same? Do posts in which people learn and advance count more still? Or is this all a matter of entertainment?

On the other hand for anything to count at all it must be read and considered, your ways certainly have enlivened the site, more people are involved and the quality has not decreased, so more are getting more from it. "People may ignore", is also permissive rather than prescriptive, which allows for a certain mix.

On balance I think you are probably right, better to not let things get bogged down. I am glad we do not lose all flexibility though. Personally I find more joy in 'sinners saved'.

Baron
September 14th, 2011, 12:59 AM
"Sinners saved" are those who learn what they're saved from. The others just remain sinners.

Phyllis
September 27th, 2011, 07:51 AM
I'm new here, and love the idea of quick little challenges and word games, so I started a thread called Repeating Rhyme Challenge. I posted the one simple rule, along with one, now two, examples of little poems that follow the rule. They are not hard to write, which I tried to show by the second one called Six Minutes, which I actually only had six minutes to write, and finished just in time to hit "post."

Now, here's why I have showed up in this discussion area: No one comes to my new little game thread. I don't know why not even one person has given it a try. I think it's fun. The limerick thread is active, and that requires writing something too. But not even one comment from anyone in my little game, let alone an attempt to play the game.

The thread is here: http://www.writingforums.com/poetry-prompts-word-games/124838-repeated-rhyme-challenge.html It two little poems in it, and I think they are worth a read. If you look at them, you see how the game works. Please take a look, then offer any insights you can on why no one at all has posted there. Sure would appreciate it.

Phyllis
October 1st, 2011, 05:19 AM
Unable to find "najjers" on web... meaning?

The Backward OX
October 1st, 2011, 03:37 PM
The Nadjer Plague featured in Series 7, Episode 3, of The Goon Show, first broadcast by the British Broadcasting Corporation 18th October 1956. Maybe Olly has memories of this and is confusing the spelling.

Phyllis
October 2nd, 2011, 10:07 AM
Just read this whole thread
And it's spinning my head.
I barely have time
To find a good rhyme,
Now I need iamb or trochee
Or dactyl or spondee
To create a small verse,
Or be told that it's worse
Than a toddler's doodles
Drawn with soup noodles.
Well my phrasing ain't even,
So I guess I'll be leavin'
And just take a pass
On this poetry class.

:)

Olly Buckle
October 2nd, 2011, 10:31 AM
Don't give up. Your lines are way too short. Pentameters means five feet in a line, the feet are a mixture of stressed and unstressed syllables, so a minimum of ten syllables in a line. Internal rhymes are more than acceptable.

I barely have time to read this whole thread
Or find a good rhyme and it's spinning my head

One of the attractions of the pentameter is the way it so often splits naturally in the middle of the line, it also takes about a breath to read aloud.

Bloggsworth
October 2nd, 2011, 10:45 AM
Was a, farmer. took a. These don't sound like iambs to me, I think they are the reverse, with the heavy stress on the first syllable. That is a trochee.

Seconded - This may be worse than the limerick thread...

Please note, iambs are a stress on the SECOND of every other syllable - Behind stresses the first.

Phyllis
October 2nd, 2011, 11:59 AM
Don't give up. Your lines are way too short. Pentameters means five feet in a line, the feet are a mixture of stressed and unstressed syllables, so a minimum of ten syllables in a line. Internal rhymes are more than acceptable.

I barely have time to read this whole thread
Or find a good rhyme and it's spinning my head

One of the attractions of the pentameter is the way it so often splits naturally in the middle of the line, it also takes about a breath to read aloud.

Olly, I'm afraid you misunderstood my purpose in writing this. Stop counting beats and see what it SAYS. I just chose to say it as a silly little rhyme. My own non-iambified de-ametered own kinda plain ole rhymy rhyme. :smile:

Just read this whole thread
And it's spinning my head.
I barely have time
To find a good rhyme,
Now I need iamb or trochee
Or dactyl or spondee
To create a small verse,
Or be told that it's worse
Than a toddler's doodles
Drawn with soup noodles.
Well my phrasing ain't even,
So I guess I'll be leavin'
And just take a pass
On this poetry class.

Bloggsworth
October 2nd, 2011, 12:27 PM
Olly, I'm afraid you misunderstood my purpose in writing this. Stop counting beats and see what it SAYS. I just chose to say it as a silly little rhyme. My own non-iambified de-ametered own kinda plain ole rhymy rhyme. :smile:

Just read this whole thread
And it's spinning my head.
I barely have time
To find a good rhyme,
Now I need iamb or trochee
Or dactyl or spondee
To create a small verse,
Or be told that it's worse
Than a toddler's doodles
Drawn with soup noodles.
Well my phrasing ain't even,
So I guess I'll be leavin'
And just take a pass
On this poetry class.

Good fun Phyllis - But when asked to play ice-hockey do you take a baseball into the rink?

Phyllis
October 2nd, 2011, 12:48 PM
There's been a lot of talk about correct limerick form, which neither I nor others in the Limerick threads pay a lot of attention to. So just to show you that I can do it, if and when I really want to, I offer this "double" limerick ... verrrry tongue in cheek.

Insisting on lims to be true,
To stick to the form like it's glue,
Is quite a great chore
And rather a bore
To rebels like me, if not you.

If you think I'm so wrong about this
And say that my brain's gone amiss,
You know what you'll find?
My big fat behind
Awaiting your sweet gentle kiss!

I'm kidding! Just having some fun with the original nature of limericks.

Phyllis
October 2nd, 2011, 01:13 PM
Olly, not when I'm just watching the game from the stands. :)

Olly Buckle
October 2nd, 2011, 07:06 PM
He is not Olly, I am.

Bloggsworth
October 2nd, 2011, 07:40 PM
He is not Olly, I am.

I vehemently deny that...

Phyllis
October 2nd, 2011, 07:43 PM
Apologies to Olly and Bloggy. You guys must be a lot alike if I get your names mixed up. Or I'm just old and easily confused.

Bloggsworth
October 2nd, 2011, 07:52 PM
Apologies to Olly and Bloggy. You guys must be a lot alike if I get your names mixed up. Or I'm just old and easily confused.

He is more handsome than I...

candid petunia
October 2nd, 2011, 08:07 PM
Hehe :distracted:

Olly Buckle
October 2nd, 2011, 09:17 PM
Sticking to a form like it is glue is a recipe for poetic boredom that is usually successful. To break the rules creatively, rather than simply randomly requires an understanding of the rules, you have the advantage there over many who enter the thread, for many this is a first introduction to formal poetry. I am all for having a bit of fun, the limerick format is good for that, but if people learn something about poetry and have fun that's double bubble.

Of course I could get picky "which neither I nor others in the Limerick threads pay a lot of attention to." the 'others' is non-specific, and the individuals involved may have varied reasons for their in-attention, to claim some sort of unity by implication is false. whilst devoting two limericks and a whole post could well be construed as quite a lot of attention being paid to the discussion. I could go on. I often do. :)

I reckon there is room for every one, a little bit of tolerance and we can have fun and learn something about manipulating words.

Olly Buckle
October 2nd, 2011, 09:20 PM
I left the leafy suburbs of North London when I was sixteen.

Phyllis
October 2nd, 2011, 11:48 PM
Since your first line has too many beats, I tweaked it a bit to fit. Here in the USA we often call suburbs simply burbs ... don't know if that's true in UK.

I left the burbs of London at sixteen
And sailed for distant lands I'd never seen

Olly Buckle
October 3rd, 2011, 08:53 AM
I have never heard the word used, it was a reference to Bloggsworth's location rather than a first line, I was brought up in Palmers Green. The North London Suburb that made "Bottle green" of the "Lion Aunt" in "Novel on Yellow Paper".

Phyllis
October 3rd, 2011, 09:00 AM
Oh, sorry I missed that, Ollie, probably because this thread has gone to a new page, leaving any references to Bloggy on the previous, hidden, page.
But, since I started a rhyme, we may as well work on it, since nothing else poetic is going on here at the moment.

I left the burbs of London at sixteen
And sailed for distant lands I'd never seen

Anyone care to add another couplet in iambic pentameter? Where is he land? Or how is the voyage?

Bloggsworth
October 3rd, 2011, 11:35 PM
I have never heard the word used, it was a reference to Bloggsworth's location rather than a first line, I was brought up in Palmers Green. The North London Suburb that made "Bottle green" of the "Lion Aunt" in "Novel on Yellow Paper".

Burbs! Burbs! Heaven forfend! I would never use such a word - I get unreasonably upset when people say less than when the should say fewer than, and don't get me started on owing to and due to...

Olly Buckle
October 4th, 2011, 09:21 AM
Burbs! Burbs! Heaven forfend! I would never use such a word - I get unreasonably upset when people say less than when the should say fewer than, and don't get me started on owing to and due to...Then there is that terrible woman on the 52 bus who says "This is a 52 to Willesden bus Garridge" every time the bus stops until I want to scream "It's a GARAGE lady, it's spelled with an 'A'."

The Backward OX
October 4th, 2011, 09:27 AM
But is it G-rarge or Gaa-rarge?

The Backward OX
October 4th, 2011, 09:31 AM
Then there is that terrible woman on the 52 bus who says "This is a 52 to Willesden bus Garridge" every time the bus stops until I want to scream "It's a GARAGE lady, it's spelled with an 'A'."

Still and all, I can understand her. You DO say garbidge for garbage, doanchu? Why not gabahge?

The Backward OX
October 4th, 2011, 10:59 AM
As for burbs, we have them here in the USA. Sure, they're suburbs, but it's common to say "living in the burbs."

I think it denotes a lack of refinement on the part of the user.


http://adrianerdedi.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/045dameedna.jpg

Phyllis
October 4th, 2011, 11:25 AM
Ox, how about sticking to the topic of the thread instead of pasting garbage all over the walls.

Olly Buckle
October 4th, 2011, 12:39 PM
I thought this was an international site, not a U.K. site. So stop dissing our lingo, guys. We bomb our own citizens you know, so you certainly aren't safe from my American wrath!

Ethnocentric paranoia, The "Willden bus Garridge" lady is about as British as they come, as are some of the things Bloggsworth listed. I am not against American usage as such, merely careless, ugly sounding, language. International site? Well yes, but even the ESL speakers use English here.

I also don't do threats or take any notice of those who make them.

Phyllis
October 8th, 2011, 07:41 AM
I thought this was an international site, not a U.K. site. So stop dissing our lingo, guys. We bomb our own citizens you know, so you certainly aren't safe from my American wrath!

I also don't do threats or take any notice of those who make them.

Nor do you know a joke when you see one, evidently!

Olly Buckle
October 9th, 2011, 07:04 PM
I am sorry, I lost my sense of humour at a charity dinner, I took it out and left it on the side plate while I was getting free some peanut that had stuck under my denture. the waitress must have been wearing a cloak of invisibility, usually I am right on these things, but she cleared away the plate with my sense of humour on it without my noticing. It was imperfect, but I miss it, mostly it only worked on ones threes and fives, and hardly ever on twos fours and sixes, it was an odd sense of humour.

The Backward OX
February 17th, 2012, 07:48 AM
A limerick is a kind of a witty, humorous, or nonsense poem especially one with a strict rhyme scheme (AABBA), which is sometimes obscene with humorous intent. The form can be found in England as of the early years of the 18th century. It was popularized by Edward Lear in the 19th century, although he did not use the term.

The following example of a limerick is of unknown origin:

The limerick packs laughs anatomical
In space that is quite economical,
But the good ones I've seen
So seldom are clean,
And the clean ones so seldom are comical.

The standard form of a limerick is a stanza of five lines, with the first, second and fifth usually rhyming with one another and having three feet of three syllables each; and the shorter third and fourth lines also rhyming with each other, but having only two feet of three syllables each.


A little thought first will always ensure the form is correct.

Olly Buckle
February 28th, 2012, 03:04 AM
This year's twelfth month will be telling
Is that fire and brimstone I'm smelling?
Should we prepare for the worst
On December 21st?

This really does not work, far too many syllables in lines 3 and 4. December 21st is an abbreviation, but it actually reads 'December the twenty first', seven syllables without the introduction.

Bloggsworth
October 7th, 2012, 01:44 PM
Doesn't scan Oxy old bean...

The Backward OX
October 8th, 2012, 06:58 AM
Disagree. Where's Olly?

JustRob
May 1st, 2017, 04:31 PM
While seeking somewhere to post a passing thought I noticed this sticky thread labelled "Important" languishing here, having seen no activity for well over four years. Why it is still sticking to its claim to be important I do not know, but it is as good a place as any to deposit my post. Indeed maybe it is very apt.

An idea for a poem came to my mind a short while ago, but I seldom write poetry and when I do it is spontaneous, the subject, lines and title all materialising within a couple of minutes and then the whole inspiration is gone. I do not indulge in poetry as a rule and these occasions are just literal flashes in the pan. What then should I do with an idea and a title that flash through my mind without a single line of poetry to accompany them? Where better than this quiet spot to deposit them in case some other person can breathe life into them and indeed the thread itself?

I was thinking about the subject of writing prose at the time and realised that sometimes a writer can commit much time to creating a character only eventually to omit that character from his final work for some reason or other. Surely such an occurrence deserves at least a requiem when readers will otherwise never know of the one that passed by unnoticed. In a way my poem can be regarded as complete, the fitting requiem for an unpublished character possibly being an unwritten poem, but perhaps someone else would like to tackle the task that my imagination has failed to. Here then in its present entirety is my very sad poem.


Requiem for The Unknown Character

jenthepen
May 1st, 2017, 05:06 PM
Requiem for The Unknown Character


He came and went without a word
unnoticed and unheard.

I kinda wonder what he thought
now that he's interred.

Olly Buckle
May 1st, 2017, 06:02 PM
When the unknown character died
The mason was stumped, though he tried.
What to write on the stone
Was a total unknown,
So to save himself trouble he lied.

Never can resist a limerick. :)

JustRob
May 1st, 2017, 06:18 PM
Thanks you two. That's probably the mark of a genuine poet, ready to tackle any subject, even a completely vague one, on demand.

Well, maybe this thread can stay sticky a little longer now. Back to my rightful place in the prose then.

Heaven knows
Why I write prose,
But I waste no time
When I write rhyme.

(Conceived just as fast as I could type it, of course.)

Olly Buckle
May 1st, 2017, 06:30 PM
One thing you have done, Rob. Added another word to my knowledge of words that have no known rhyme; requiem.

JustRob
May 1st, 2017, 06:35 PM
One thing you have done, Rob. Added another word to my knowledge of words that have no known rhyme; requiem.

So although it may be the last word in one sense it isn't likely to be the last word in a poem. What a poetic thought.

P.S.

Here's another one.

She recited Jack's requiem
In a veil wiv a lacy 'em,
But wiv Jack lately dead
She then shacked up wiv Fred,
So Jack's brother shot both of 'em.

Pelwrath
December 19th, 2017, 07:10 PM
Question. In prose it's show don't tell; active not passive; etc. What rules of prose apply to poetry? Does poetic license exist and if so what does it allow one to do? Does poetry have it's own unique rules?

Olly Buckle
December 19th, 2017, 11:01 PM
Firstly I would disagree with 'rules', there are techniques which are frequently used and generally effective, but don't rule anything out in prose.

The rules which apply to poetry depend on which sort of poetry; the poetic form. It is worth learning about metrical feet of various sorts as an introduction.

thefloridapoet
June 27th, 2019, 09:13 PM
Olly - it isn't perfect, but one could use a twist and end with "ahem".

However, I can't come up with anymore than that right now. boo me...... would that I would be clever today, but sadly that isn't in the cards

Olly Buckle
June 29th, 2019, 02:35 PM
Question. In prose it's show don't tell; active not passive; etc. What rules of prose apply to poetry? Does poetic license exist and if so what does it allow one to do? Does poetry have it's own unique rules?

The rules are only in your head, as you choose them. If you choose to write a sonnet you abide by certain rules, fourteen lines in iambic pentameters, split into three parts, a particular rhyming scheme, you know the form. However, you can write a poem in any form you choose, it doesn't even have to make sense, look at 'Howl' or 'Jabberwocky'. Same goes for prose, if you want to write a particular type of story you can choose to write in a particular way, or choose to write on a well known theme. But, poetry or prose, these are all choices, not rules.

Looking for overall rules is a good way of adopting other people's restrictions and strangling your creativity; applying your own restrictions can be stimulating. That is why I can start a thread like 'The rules and regulations' denying rules, and also the 'Limerick' thread as a fun introduction to the pleasure of creating in a formal poetic form.