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Thread: Story Summary...opinions?

  1. #1
    Writer theflowerofcarnage is on a distinguished road
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    Story Summary...opinions?

    I posted this on another board, but I think it's good to get a lot of opinions. I'm currently writing a story called My Darling Salacious, and I'm wondering whether it's the type of material that would sell or not.

    It's about this girl named Shavaughnn Darling (hence the title) who is forced to deal with her extremely dysfunctional, chaotic family (her father is abusive and suffers from alcoholism; her mother has abandoned her family; and her brother is a pervasive drug addict). Despite being dirt poor, she is very popular at school and also considered highly attractive, but her life is still empty of happiness.

    She endeavours to distance herself from her father, whom she thinks causes nothing but humiliation, by endlessly partying . But after she gets date raped she really doesn't know if she can continue to endure the type of life she has. So she runs away and is pulled into a whirlwind of stripping, prostitution, further abuse, and pornography.

    During her self-proclaimed journey to self-discovery she meets two troubled men that she falls hard for. First is Pierce, a former cerebral geek who turned to drug dealing after a series of incidents following a terrifying night of rape. Rumours of his alleged homosexuality began floating around his school, he assumed by the new boy he befriended, who in return maliciously raped him.

    The other guy is Damien, a former high school jock, former adult film star, and current porn director, who's real identity has been buried for years. He didn't have a choice, not after the hit-and-run, and not after seeing his girlfriend violently murdered in front of him.

    Shavaughnn is soon convinced to become part of the adult film industry, and tentatively embraces her career, much to Damien's pleasure and Pierce's chagrin. But when Damien grows belligerent and extremely possesive, not to mention his continuous thirst for wild, kinky sex, and addiction to drugs and booze, Shavaughnn feels like she's run out of ways to escape her everlasting nightmare.


    Would this type of story sell? Yeah. I know it's kind of been done before, a little bit differently. Would any of you read a story with this summary attached to it?
    Last edited by theflowerofcarnage; 01-17-2007 at 05:34 PM.

  2. #2
    Ink Slinger lisajane is an unknown quantity at this point lisajane's Avatar
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    I'd read it. I'm not sure if it would become a best seller, but there's always people who would read it.

    Just two things, and it's her name -

    1. What sort of name is 'Shavaughnn'? I've never heard of the name, it sounded like a made up fantasy name. Is it supposed to be pronunced like 'Siobhan' (sha-VAHN)?

    2. I would change her last name, and bring in 'Darling' as like a last-name change as a pornographic actress.
    'Beauty stands and waits with gravity to start her death-defying leap. And he, a little charleychaplin man, who may or may not catch her fair eternal form spreadeagled in the empty air of existence.' - Laurence Felinghetti, 'The Acrobat'

  3. #3
    Writer theflowerofcarnage is on a distinguished road
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    1. What sort of name is 'Shavaughnn'? I've never heard of the name, it sounded like a made up fantasy name. Is it supposed to be pronunced like 'Siobhan' (sha-VAHN)?
    Yeah, it is. I don't like it spelled that way though. I've seen variations of it, one that was spelled Shavaughn. I just added an extra 'n'. I have this thing about my characters having original names. It's pathetic, but I always feel so compelled to do it.

    2. I would change her last name, and bring in 'Darling' as like a last-name change as a pornographic actress.
    I like that idea. I'll have to change her real last name to something else, though. Thanks for the suggestion.
    Last edited by theflowerofcarnage; 01-13-2007 at 11:22 PM.

  4. #4
    Ink Slinger lisajane is an unknown quantity at this point lisajane's Avatar
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    Her first name makes more sense now, but I would leave off the extra 'n'. That looks original-weird, not original-unique.

    You could look up adult movie actresses' real names, and see what sort of last names they had before they changed (many changed).
    'Beauty stands and waits with gravity to start her death-defying leap. And he, a little charleychaplin man, who may or may not catch her fair eternal form spreadeagled in the empty air of existence.' - Laurence Felinghetti, 'The Acrobat'

  5. #5
    Addict quarterscot is on a distinguished road
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    a) Yes it could find a publisher, if it's written and packaged well enough. Sex sells novels, despair sells novels. They're not very often combined but there's likely to be people wanting a 'Jackie Collins meets Albert Camus.' (It's probably nothing like either Jackie Collins or Albert Camus, but that could be the tagline your publisher slaps on it.) And b) no, I wouldn't read it. But there's a fantastic number of books I wouldn't read. My rule is: if my mum wouldn't approve, I stay away.

    Incidentally, I wouldn't put in the line 'terrifying night of sodomy.' It's unintentionally hilarious for many, many reasons.

  6. #6
    Writer theflowerofcarnage is on a distinguished road
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    'Jackie Collins meets Albert Camus.'
    That's a pretty interesting combination. I've heard of them but haven't read their work, so yeah, you're right, my story is nothing like what either of them write (stylistically).

    Incidentally, I wouldn't put in the line 'terrifying night of sodomy.' It's unintentionally hilarious for many, many reasons.
    Well, I changed it. Does it sound less weird now?

  7. #7
    Addict quarterscot is on a distinguished road
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    Yes, that's done the trick. 'Sodomy' is one of those ridiculous old-fashioned words that always gets me sniggering. 'Rape' is never funny and it always has impact.

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