Thread: Format of dialogue in first line

Just wondering what people think. I wanted to start off a new section in my story with some dialogue, but when I indented it, it kind of looked odd.
Typical rule for new section after several blank lines is to not indent the paragraph. This looks fine when it is narrative. Then the next paragraph or line of dialogue is indented.

But I wanted to start off with a line of dialogue and couldn't decide which looked better, indented or not indented.


"I am not going in there." She cried in pain.
Kicking and spitting......

(imagine indent)"I am not going in there."
She cried in pain. Kicking and spitting....

See what I mean?

*Shrug* I always indent everything when it's not being posted online, but if you would normally not indent that line, then I say be consistent. It shouldn't matter whether it's dialogue or not.

Kicking and spitting...... "I am not going in there." She cried in pain.


Would get round the problem, if only we knew what followed spitting....

Or:

In pain, she cried "I am not going in there." Kicking and spitting......

Originally Posted by Bloggsworth

Kicking and spitting...... "I am not going in there." She cried in pain.


Would get round the problem, if only we knew what followed spitting....

Or:

In pain, she cried "I am not going in there." Kicking and spitting......

Hi, the example I put on the post is not something in my story, just used it as an example for what I am asking. If I wanted to start a new section with dialogue etc. Cheers anyway.

Originally Posted by Robdemanc

Typical rule for new section after several blank lines is to not indent the paragraph... Then the next paragraph or line of dialogue is indented.

You answered your own question. : ) It may look funny, but your original inclinations were correct.

I've seen unindented paragraphs beginning with dialogue. If it's the beginning of a story, or a new section, then it's fine. Example:

"I am not going in there," she cried.
__George exhaled tiredly and ran his fingers through his hair.

I know that in many books, the first lines of chapters aren't indented. The material that those lines contain is irrelevant. There is no rule to this sort of thing, then, so just whatever suits you is what you should go with.

So, as Kyle said, your initial read of things was correct.

Originally Posted by Robdemanc

Hi, the example I put on the post is not something in my story, just used it as an example for what I am asking. If I wanted to start a new section with dialogue etc. Cheers anyway.

Without context it's an unanswerable question.

Originally Posted by Bloggsworth

Without context it's an unanswerable question.

This situation I have is that several characters have been in a situation where they are effectively under arrest and confined. During one scene they are reluctant to speak to each other because their captors may be listening. The scene ends and there is line spaces to indicate a new section. When the new section begins I wanted the first line to be dialogue and wondered if I should indent the dialogue, or not. The new section indicates they are in a location where they feel comfortable enough to speak to each other. I don't have to do it but would like to. I just wanted to know what people thought. Thanks

My first reaction is not to indent (undent?), but I take your point it's going to look strange on the page. In other words I don't know. Let me know what you decide.

CHAPTER FOUR

"Sam, are you awake?"
.......... "What do you think?"
.......... "I was just askin'."

Originally Posted by Vertigo

I know that in many books, the first lines of chapters aren't indented. The material that those lines contain is irrelevant. There is no rule to this sort of thing, then, so just whatever suits you is what you should go with.

So, as Kyle said, your initial read of things was correct.

That stylistic choice is one which is made by the editors and design folks when the finished book was laid out for publication. Standard Manuscript format says to indent every paragraph. Authors shouldn't worry so much about how the manuscript looks unless they are self publishing and are themselves responsible for the layout of the finished product. If submitting to an agent, or publisher just use the standard format. At the submission level of the process it is far more important for the MS to look professional than it is for it to look like the author's vision.

I tend to format my first lines like this. To tell the truth, I don't know if it is 'the right way' or not, but it's the way i've always done it. any informed advice on this would be of great benefit to me also.

my general rule of thumb is to always indent when there's a new:

chapter (including the first line of the manuscript)
paragraph (duh)
piece of dialogue - i.e a new speaker.


if it's a heavy-dialogue piece i personally don't see any problem with 'stacking up' each piece by indenting every time. i like the idea of speech being emphasized through indentation. like this:




so the 'formatted page' typically looks like this:




I was always taught that, generally, line breaks should only be used to signify either a lapse in time (i.e the end of one narrative and beginning of another) or a change in location. a change in tense or character POV would fall under this as well. however i'm aware it seems this rule is flexible, particularly nowadays, but as a reader i personally find excessive use of line breaks makes a piece feel a little amateurish. a block of text need not be hard on the eye if it is formatted correctly, with appropriate indentation. however if anyone disagrees with the way i did it in the above examples i'd be very interested, since its not something i ever paid a whole lot of attention to.

That's the correct format, luckyscars.

Originally Posted by luckyscars

I tend to format my first lines like this. To tell the truth, I don't know if it is 'the right way' or not, but it's the way i've always done it. any informed advice on this would be of great benefit to me also.

my general rule of thumb is to always indent when there's a new:

chapter (including the first line of the manuscript)
paragraph (duh)
piece of dialogue - i.e a new speaker.

For my own purposes I never use 'justified' - I use 'left alignment'. I'm fairly confident about that and I don't indent the first line of the script or the first line of a chapter. I am also confident about that.

When starting a chapter with dialogue I would indent although logic tells me to be consistent and 'left align' - I would take advice on this.

Originally Posted by luckyscars

Is that from a story of yours? I wouldn't mind reading more of it.

I don't normally indent dialogue like that, but maybe I should.

Originally Posted by josh.townley

Is that from a story of yours? I wouldn't mind reading more of it.

I don't normally indent dialogue like that, but maybe I should.

josh.townley: yeah it's from the novel i'm writing at the moment. 25 thousand words and counting! and sure, i'll probably put up a few chapters on here at some point, but if you PM me your email i'll happily send you a sneak preview it's a huge compliment to have somebody interested in my work, especially based on a couple of screen shots

OP: i've done some research on 'proper formatting' and it is correct to format it like i did in those screen shots, except qwertyman is correct that all manuscript text should be left-justified.