Thread: What Do You Think Of My New Novel Series Idea

last time I was here I posted an idea I had about a utopia world and everyone said it needed more conflict. So I decided I might go with another idea that I had about a utopian world that has conflict in it. Unfortunately I didn't think it was a good idea so I deleted the file of prewriting I had done and I haven't made another one so I'll just have to describe it to you. The title is going to be Star Warriors (that way it won't get confused with the Warrior Cats series by Erin Hunter often shorten to Warriors). The story is mainly about two completely different worlds at war with each other. One world is a futuristic utopian world ruled by a King and Queen, while the other world is a dystopian world Ruled by a president and is based on the United States. The Protagonist of the story is the young Princess of the Utopian world. In the beginning of the series she is a timid fourteen year old girl who has little interest in being a warrior. Eventually she has a dream telling her that she is meant to be a warrior and a leader. After the dream she dedicates herself to learning how to be a good warrior and leader. By the end of the series she has matured into a twenty year old warrior princess who must kill the main antagonist, the president of the dystopian world. Tell me what you think, but no rude comments please.

Well... I think only you could write it.

Your story has potential, especially among the supporting characters. Any story involving a person as young as your protagonist should have at least one, perhaps several, mentors - older, wiser, willing to share their experience with the protagonist. Mentor characters are often burned out, tired of life until they meet their new protege and learn to enjoy seeing the world through new eyes again. For inspiration or ideas for young women competing in the traditionally masculine realms of war and politics, I suggest biographies of Catherine the Great and Joan of Arc. If you like movies, try "Young Catherine" and "The Messenger." Both have older, male, mentor characters. Good luck. C.M.

I'll think of a mentor character for my protagonist as you said. I'll also get to looking up info on Catherine the Great and Joan of Arc. I'm very glad you see this story has potential.

Originally Posted by CrystalDreamer59

In the beginning of the series she is a timid fourteen year old girl who has little interest in being a warrior. Eventually she has a dream telling her that she is meant to be a warrior and a leader. After the dream she dedicates herself to learning how to be a good warrior and leader.

I don't like this transition. Maybe you're going for a "Joan of Arc" vibe here, but it doesn't feel right for a character to have such a drastic turnaround from something as simple as a dream. I think it's important to have a stronger underlying motivation than "I dreamed about it once."

EDIT: When I mentioned Joan of Arc, mine was the only response to do so. I just got sidetracked and didn't post at first, so sorry for the redundancy. =P

It does sound promising. I agree with Gamer_2k4 that the dream idea is a bit weak, though.
Also, I think for the story to be strong, you will need to add a lot of depth to the dystopian world, and its leader. He should have strong motivation for doing whatever it is that makes the MC want to kill him. Maybe his world and his people are in decline, so he has no choice but to start a war. I don't like stories where the bad guys are bad for no real reason at all. I like to be able to see their side of the story too.
Similarly, the utopians shouldn't be all good and perfect, either. They might be somehow responsible for the decline of the other world, and refuse to offer help.
Just some things to think about.

I was thinking that the reason for the dystopian world to attack the utopian world is similar to why the fire nation decided to destroy the other nations in the anime Avatar: The Last Airbender, To share their wealth, power, and idea of government. And yes the utopian world isn't all perfect that's why there are warriors making sure everyone obeys the rules or else they get punished on the utopian world.

I think you should just write it and see how it turns out. Allow the ideas to come as you write.

Originally Posted by Robdemanc

I think you should just write it and see how it turns out. Allow the ideas to come as you write.

Just be forewarned that that approach does not work for everyone. I would go to pieces if I had to write a story without lengthy preparation and planning.