Thread: Making my character likable

I am working on a historical romance novel.

My heroine is sort of a "ruined" debutante, as she was practically engaged to a Duke when the guy literally ran off and married another lady. A year later she really was engaged, when her fiance was caught in a compromising position with a society girl and was forced to marry her instead. So when the story picks up, she is trying to rebuild her reputation. She's embarrassed, and she's heart broken.

When I originally started the first chapter, she was having a weak moment and was coming down pretty hard on herself. The problem was that the reader didn't really find out until chapter 3 why she was feeling that way. Usually novels sort of leave it up to the story to explain the history which is what I did, but when I was rereading, she came across as pitiful and unlikable; not at all the strong female lead that has been through a lot, which is what I was going for. I'm afraid that a reader wouldn't even get through chapter one before going "Wow, this is a downer" and putting the book away (as this type of novel usually involves a spunky, energetic heroine).

So I went back and added a few pages to the beginning, which kind of summarizes her side of the story and goes into what she has been through since the ordeal happened (two years prior to the beginning of the book). After reading it again, I feel like that put a more positive shine on the character, but my sister (who is my creative outlet) thinks I may have revealed too much too soon.

So I guess I am having a hard time finding a balance between making sure the reader understands the character enough to care about her and find her interesting, and keeping some of the history a mystery to reveal later in the story.

Never mind.

I have a story that's very much like this. My heroine and main character is a pianist that suffered a terrible accident, where her twin sister was left leg paralyzed and the girl injured her right hand, left unable to play the piano.

Fast forward 5 years, and I simply showed the current state of affairs, not what actually happened. Characters should not just be depressed by what happened, but also be changed by the event in question. The conflict between their current state and their previous selves is what makes the situation feel real. I didn't just outright say that she can't play the piano, but the paralyzed sister is a good hint that something went wrong at some point, and that their oddities are the result of that. My heroine is also excessively caring for her sister, pointing that she might feel guilty about something. Finally, at one point in the story she is forced to admit that she played the piano, and that's when the back story unveils with full force.

Give some clues by showing their current social standing, and what they are doing to overcome their problems (if they are). Don't outright say what happened, but leave hints from the characters that interact with her and know what happened. Let their readers know what her thoughts are on the matter, bring similar situations and describe how she reacts to them. I think that's a much better idea than outright saying what happened.

Elite's advice is so much better than the crap that came to mind for me.

Sometimes a character is trying to tell you something. When I first started writing the story in my novel, the person I thought was the MC was strong, beautiful, powerful. Over time she changed until I finally realized she just might be a villain. This was a shock to me. Characters can really end up showing you who they are over time and that can change the whole story.

When I originally started the first chapter, she was having a weak moment and was coming down pretty hard on herself. The problem was that the reader didn't really find out until chapter 3 why she was feeling that way

You could drop subtle hints. Objects would be the best way to go about this. Also, if you can, show her irrational reaction to something one of her former partners maybe liked to do: say simply that 'he was into that, I don't want to talk about it' or something similar.

I suspect you've revealed too much too soon. It sounds a lot like an infodump. Just drop clues for your readers to find in the text, and they will follow the trail further into the story to see where it leads. Don't tell them everything right off the bat - in fact, tell them hardly anything. Let them work it out for themselves.

Any reason you don't start when she is the nice person and gets dumped? I guess my main question is...if you are starting after she has been changed, it will be harder for the reader to take that brief explanation of those events as justification for your character being unlikeable. If the character is likeable, and then becomes unlikeable by events the reader experiences with her, then they will understand her feelings and be more inclined to stick with her to see if she pulls out of it.

Bleh.



I think I'm going to continue on with the rest of the story, and probably come back later to scrap it and start it fresh. I'll probably just drop the self pitying scene altogether just for character presentation sake. Or maybe put it later in the story.

Thanks!

Well its because there are two separate events, each separated by a year. And I don't really think the character is unlikable, but I'm having trouble presenting her, I suppose.

Not knowing the basis for the story, rejection at that level is a character changing event, and would be far more powerful shown than mentioned. It is also easy to skip time periods that are dull and routine: The next year went by.... and whatever you want to put to give a quick summation of the previous year. Can be done in a sentence, and could be a lead in to the next disaster. Skipping time by simply saying it past is perfectly acceptable in stories that span many years.

Thank you, that is really good advice!

Right now, I am going to scrap both beginnings (the one that explains and the one that bums me out) and start with something that shows the growth she has made instead. I think I just needed to focus on how I wanted the reader to perceive her. I don't want her to come across as depressed, which is how it seemed at first. I believe that at that point she would still be hurt, but I want to tell the story of her resolve to pick up the pieces and do what she's got to do to get on with her life. Afterwards if I feel like it still needs further explanation I may go back and add another chapter to the beginning with that part... or perhaps a prologue.

Thanks everyone!