Here is the beginning of my fantasy novel. It's already published. I just want to know what some of you think.
Prologue
A cold starry stormy night fell upon Gondoria. Gondoria lied in the northwestern part of Carparthia at the end of the Hefnia Valley and behind the Hefnia Mountains. Gazora, the evil king of Carparthia, sat at his throne in his hall waiting anxiously. He had slammed the citizens of Carparthia with large taxes and taken a great deal of rights away from them. In many places, he took the little bit of land they had away from the peasants.
He feared that he would be attacked, maybe by the Dwarfs from The Liliac Valley or other citizens throughout the land. Maybe both if they joined forces. He knew he needed to be more powerful in order to stop the inevitable.
He wore a long black robe, the same color as everything else in his palace. He had dark black hair that came down to his shoulders. His dark green eyes scanned the room. They seemed to go red when he turned angry.
Throughout the room was armor and pictures of him. Servants roamed around the hall cleaning. They all wore unhappy faces. Some held bruises and other markings where Gazora had beaten them. One of the servants carried a tray holding a cup of wine and some fruit to occupy Gazora’s wait. She walked up to the king, frightened, and offered some. He took the glass of wine and a cluster of grapes and filled himself up. She waited, holding the tray, keeping it accessible for him.
“Why does General Vardine not stand here before me?” Gazora screamed getting very angry.
Everyone knew General Vardine to be Gazora’s most trustworthy General as well as most powerful man other than Gazora himself. He waved the servant away at the same time a man accompanied by two soldiers rushed in.
He too wore a black robe as Gazora, however, lacking the royalty look. He was a few inches over six feet and had no hair. He looked to be in his forties.
In his hand he carried a case about six inches on each side and a little less than six as its height. The case was no ordinary case. It was covered in rubies, diamonds, sapphire, gold, and silver. He walked quickly up to the throne where Gazora sat. The Kings eyes lit up at the sight of the fancy majestic case.
“Sorry for the long wait,” Vardine apologized breathing heavily. “We ran into some . . . . Difficulties with those guarding it.”
Gazora stayed sitting but reached his hand out for the case. Everyone in the room was covered with frightened looks except for the general and his companions. They all knew that whatever lied in that case wasn’t good. Vardine handed it to him.
Gazora took it, handling it as if it was a child of his. The case was so beautiful with all its jewels on it. In the middle of it was a small blue jewel of some sort. Gazora exulted over this new object. The king just stared at the case and did not open it just yet.
“General Vardine,” Gazora started, “Do you know what this is?”
Vardine looked at him in confusion. “Isn’t it the stone of old, the stone with powers?”
“This is the stone my father searched for till his death. This is the stone that only I can use.” Gazora looked at it with twinkling eyes. “This,” Gazora began again, dramatically this time, “is Blue Destiny, also known as the stone of eternity. This stone allows me to do things, extraordinary things. No one will ever try to overcome me! This stone will allow me to have special powers such as the use of water and the use of fire. I will be unstoppable.”
Vardine stared at Gazora with excitement, waiting for him to open it. He looked as if he was waiting for an award. Gazora noticed this but said nothing.
Everyone in the room watched him as he opened the case. When the case was open, he did not take anything out at once. He stared blankly in the case and his smile faded away turning into an angry frown.
“General Vardine,” Gazora said raising his voice with each syllable. “Why does Blue Destiny not occupy this case?”
Vardine’s smile faded away at once and he said stuttering, “I-I don’t u-understand. No one but me has handled the case. It w-was in there when I-I left.” Anger overtook Gazora. He stood out of his chair and threw the case across the hall.
“How am I supposed to use the power now?” screamed Gazora.
“My Lord, no other than myself has touched it.”
“Argh!”Gazora growled loudly. “Do you know nothing of the stone of old? Have I taught you nothing? Do you not know that I cannot rule Carparthia forever without this stone? Do you not realize that I could be overthrown by other forces? You say only you have had contact. Shall I punish you? You know how my punishments are… how brutal!”
Vardine showed fear and anger. He could’ve sworn he had it. Why didn’t he think to look inside before taking it? Gazora looked at him as if he would kill him.
“I HAVE TO HAVE THAT STONE!” Gazora screamed again.
Gazora now stood feet away from his General. Everyone else in the room was no doubt happy that he did not have the stone of eternity. Some of them didn’t care to show it by displaying a small smile.
A short pause passed by before Gazora asked where Vardine thought the stone may be. He took out a map and walked to Gazora’s for him to see.
“We started in Khar’kov and followed the road alongside the Dauning Forest where the Zug’s live, then through Hefnia Valley.” After he finished, he folded up the map and stepped back to where he was standing before. Gazora looked up and pondered a while. Vardine stood there as if waiting to hear if he would die or live.
“I am not going to kill you,” Gazora said surprising everyone in the room. A look of relief came over Vardine and surprising looks came over everyone else. Was the king letting him live after all of that? “You are my best General, and I intend for you to gather a group of Zug’s and search your trail until you find this stone. I want you to look forever. As far as anyone knows, I am the only one to be able to use the stone. If The Stone is found and recognized, they will for sure take it to The Dwarves.”
“Will we attack the Dwarfs?” Vardine asked. Gazora thought for a moment before answering.
“No,” he said turning around. “I do not want war yet. Wait till we find the stone, or if someone else finds it, we will have to attack. I will be able to tell with my personal seers.”
Vardine was getting ready to leave to get a group when Gazora turned back around and demanded for the guards to shut his doors, trapping everyone inside. Everyone in the room began to panic as they did so. They knew something was about to happen by the sneaky look on Gazora’s face.
Gazora was now behind Vardine. Vardine turned around with a very questioning look.
“Everyone in this room, other than you, hates me. They have listened to our conversation and know of where to look for the stone. How can I trust them? What if they find it and rush it to the Dwarfs?”
Everyone in the room knew what Gazora was thinking and began to run around looking for a place to hide. Some ran to the door and beat on it hoping to get out. It was no use. Both Gazora and Vardine, with the help of the two companions with Vardine, took their blades and started a massacre. Women were screaming and begging for mercy, but the four of them cared not. It was an awful onslaught.
Within a few minutes, there were servants lying everywhere and blood everywhere.
“Vardine,” Gazora hollered pointing at the two companions. Vardine got his drift and stabbed one of his guards giving him no warning. The other drew his sword and ran for Gazora. Gazora was able to knock his blade out of his hands easily and pierced his heart.
“Did you honestly think you could kill me?” He told him as he fell to the ground. Gazora removed his sword and wiped his blade with a rag he had in his pocket. Vardine did the same with his own rag.
Once Gazora was finished, he walked back to his throne. A blue eyed woman rushed in as soon as he sat down. She had long blond hair and was very beautiful. Her face was so clear, holding not one scar.
“Gazora!” she screamed as she stopped in front of him at his chair. “What has happened?” The women obviously knew enough to know that he would not kill her.
“It’s okay darling” he replied in a calm voice. “Go back to bed. I will be there in a few minutes.” She looked unsure. Gazora waved his hand for her to leave. She did as she was told and left Gazora and Vardine alone.
“You may go and gather your group in the morning.” He told Vardine
“Yes sir,” he replied with a bow and walked out of Gazora’s hall.
“Guards!” Gazora hollered. At once, a guard came into the hall with a bow. “Move these bodies and order another servant to clean the blood up.”
Darkness covered the land. Rain blew in all directions following the wind. A mid age horseman wearing a black coat with his hood over his head so that the rain would smack him in the head was fleeing Khar’kov. General Vardine had just left with the stone heading toward Gondoria to Gazora. Or so he thought.
He and nine other guards had been guarding the stone for several years, keeping the stone out of the hands of anyone, especially Gazora, being able to use its power and all. They waited for the day for the Dwarfs to find another possible way to use it. Gazora’s father had been in search for many years but never found Blue Destiny. The search even killed him. Gazora had discovered that the Dwarfs had found it and it was taken to a secured place. What they didn’t know was that Gazora also knew where they hid it. He found the location and was too much of a coward to come himself.
The other guards were not as lucky to get away alive. This particular guard was able to escape with a large secret. The Liliac valley was too far away to reach so he headed for Leona where Lord Barthomew, who also was against Gazora, lived.
He had a long journey ahead of him. He planned to take the road that ran down south toward Albany crossing the Arial River. He would then head west toward a forest that lied in the middle of the land. It was inside that forest was Leona.
It would take an average person two and a half months to make the trip. The horseman knew the importance of his secret and didn’t have that time. He slept only once a few days and ate very little every day. Sometimes he would go a couple of days without eating. The food he ate was jerky and bread. He didn’t have the time to hunt.
He had been riding for nearly a month when he reached Albany. He could see the Arial River ahead of him where the water was just high enough for the horse to wade. He decided that that was the place to cross. He had been riding hard for two days straight and the horse was very tired. As soon as the horse hit the river, he fell over, throwing his rider along with his belongings off. It was pitch black. The rain had stopped and the moon was hidden by layers of clouds. He rushed to get everything that was his.
He looked down to see a large cut on his waist that was bleeding. The cut wasn’t deep enough to worry about. He rushed to his horse to find it unable to get up. He knew that the horse wouldn’t be able to make the rest of the trip.
He looked around in desperation. His eye caught the stables just yards away. He would never have done this before, but given the circumstances he rushed to it and stole the best looking horse in there. He rode out and looked at the injured horse. It had now managed to get up and limp out of the water. It wouldn’t make it. There was nothing he could do. Within a few minutes, he was riding the trail again as hard as he could.
It had been nearly a month since the accident. He had finally reached Leona and Barthomew’s palace. He rushed in knowing exactly where to go. He hadn’t slept, or even eaten in three days. His eyes were blood shot and his clothing was torn everywhere. He ran as fast as he could. It was early morning so Barthomew was awake sitting at his throne doing business. The horseman burst through the door causing everyone in the hall to jump up and look in his direction.
“May I help you?” Barthomew asked shocked by his appearance. “What has happened to you?”
“P-please,” The man hollered. His heart was beating so fast he couldn’t hear anything else. He was so exhausted and weak that with every word he stuttered. “I-I have s-something that G-G-Gazora should never g-get his h-hand on.” He dug his hand inside a small pouch he had attached to his waist. The same one he had cut in the accident.
He panted heavily as his heart beat as fast as ever. As he searched in the pouch he stopped and his eyes got very wide. No. What had happened? Barthomew was about to open his mouth and speak when the horseman began panting even more. His face turned red and he began to panic. That very moment the horseman fell over onto the floor motionless.
Everyone in the room ran to him. The maid went to him first and searched for a pulse on his wrist. A few minutes later, she placed her hand on his chest as if to make sure.
“He’s dead, My Lord,” she said in horror. Barthomew walked to the man and leaned down to him. He saw that the man’s right hand was in a pouch and his fingers were coming out the other end through a hole.
……………Seventeen years later
CHAPTER ONE



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