Thread: Need help..how write death scene

In the novel, I'm writing I want include a death scene but I'm not sure how write it..Not the death scene itself but more like funeral,wake and the burial.Like I have an idea what happens, two cheerleaders were going to fast down back country roads, the car did not even hit the break and falls into the river, it had rain couple nights before so the river level was higher than normal, the girls drown in the river. But I don't want write that the main character would just get call about it as she heads to the river to meet with her friends. I envisoned the girls being in the casket in their cheerleading uniforms with their poms poms. But any suggestions will be welcome, I'm new to the craft so I want soak all the advice I can get.

So you don't want to write the death scene? That sounds more interesting. Funerals are generally really boring and depressing.

If you can envision it, just write that. If you need help with what actual goes on at a funeral, well I'm sure that we could write up a schedule of some sort. I've been to way too many these past couple years.

There is usually a viewing in which family goes to see them laid out in their casket. For family it might be the night before, then for everyone else just a period before the service begins, unless it is a grave side service, then it would be the day before for everyone. Then there is a service, which usually involves a lot of talking, if religious some quotes from whatever book they follow, crying... Then they load up the caskets, either pallbearers, or a hearse will take them to the graveside. You can have them view the burial or not. Sometimes after the service the pastor or whomever will just say the wake is being held at such and such. Then people will leave and not actually watch the casket being lowered into the ground.

Graveside services are usually closed casket. People don't like to watch the casket closing.

The wake is often held at the deceased family house or church. Usually there is a lot of food. People walk over to the family and offer condolences and support. Then they wander around eating and talking with other people.

Truthfully one of the most emotionally devastating moments was watching my cousin carry the tiny coffin of his infant daughter from the chapel to the graveside. All the speeches and sermons didn't mean a thing but the sight of him carrying that tiny coffin. I broke down bawling.

Don't write out the whole thing. Write the emotionally charged parts. Write the viewing with the girls in their outfits and the mother collapsing on the ground in front of the casket. Write the casket disappearing into the dark hole dirt raining down on the calla lilies. You don't have to write out the whole thing. Just the parts that evoke emotion, it's a funeral, if you are bawling as you write it out then you are on the right track.

Does that help?

So you think writing death scene would be good idea?

You could have the main character be walking through the crowd at the wake, watching people eat and listening to them talk about the way her friends died. This would build character and emotional resonance - how does the main character react to the gossip? It also wouldn't go into too much detail at once. It would help with the pacing and keep the readers interested.

I think you shouldn't avoid writing the death scene. You write what you feel fits into the story. Right now you know how the death happens, you have that scene clearly planned out. So write it. You can always change it later. If nothing else it will give you a clear picture so that the details are all worked out for however you figure out in the end to write it out.

i suggest, a short, but meaningful scene. Try to make suggestions as to the reason why they died. It depends if they are first person or not though, the level of emotion and etcetera would vary. Also, make a conscious effort to manipulate the structure and size of your sentences to have the reader read the sentences at a certain pace.