Thread: Pussy Galore

I have hit a brick wall with my novel, and need help.

Very briefly, this woman wants to work as a hooker, using a big old red convertible as her place of business.

And she needs a really convincing and persuasive line to feed her potential customers about why they need to use her car instead of a motel room or similar.

But my mind’s gone blank on reasons why.

So, can you help? The only guideline is that it must sound convincing. The johns have to swallow it hook line and sinker. They have to want to use the car as much as she does. Corny lines such as “lower overheads mean lower prices” won’t work.

And please don’t suggest I abandon the convertible idea. It has to stay in place as part of a scam.


Thanks in advance.

Maybe she's intentionally targeting classic car buffs? Or guys who have a thing for car sex?

I'll give it some more though.

It's always better in the back if you catch my drift.

The need for the room so that things can get buck wild.

Here’s an example for you. My cousin and his girlfriend at the time we going at it in the passenger side of his pickup truck while camping. The kids were sleeping in the tent so they made do with the truck. I don’t know how crazy things got but he managed to crack the windshield with her forehead. From what I gather she was sitting on his lap with her back to him. All I know is that must have been one hell of a nut for the both of them.

Originally Posted by The Backward OX

I have hit a brick wall with my novel, and need help.

Very briefly, this woman wants to work as a hooker, using a big old red convertible as her place of business.

And she needs a really convincing and persuasive line to feed her potential customers about why they need to use her car instead of a motel room or similar.

But my mind’s gone blank on reasons why.

So, can you help? The only guideline is that it must sound convincing. The johns have to swallow it hook line and sinker. They have to want to use the car as much as she does. Corny lines such as “lower overheads mean lower prices” won’t work.

And please don’t suggest I abandon the convertible idea. It has to stay in place as part of a scam.

Thanks in advance.

Convincing? I can't imagine any 'excuse' that would ever be convincing, unless it's convincing to her as well, in which case it would be self-evident to you. Simply put, you should change your line of thought. This is a professional woman, adept at knowing what men want (desire) and need. Instead of thinking about various lines she could feed customers to convince them that the car is the best place, start thinking about the various fantasies she could play on to ply them into wanting to be no where else but in the car with her.

Originally Posted by The Backward OX

Thank you. It may not be quite so easy. The way in which you’ve presented “various lines” and “various fantasies” seems to me to indicate they are one and the same thing.

She must use the stick shift in the reproduction process because her clients have very small penises and only a stick shift car can satisfy her.

The clutch is, well, passable.

Bernard almost felt the big red Caddy trundle up behind him, driving on the wrong side of the street. He resisted turning out of sheer dread, but finally dared a sidways glance and stopped so suddenly he almost tripped. The driver was a knockout blonde wearing firetruck red dress cut so low you could see almost to China. And she was smiling at him!
He goggled while she ghosted the Cadillac to the curb and looked up at him looking down.
She licked her lips, the same red as the Cad, and said, "Remember high school?"
Nonplussed, Bernard nodded.
"And what did you really, really, really want when you were in high school? Good grades?"
"I had good grades,"
"I believe it. But did you ever, like even once, wish you were driving a big, cool car with some stacked babe and you managed to get her over into the back seat and have it off with her? Hot music on the radio, her foot out the window, windows all steamy? That ever occur to you?"
"Well, not really... I mean maybe... Yes! I wanted that a lot!"
"That why you kepy that condom in your wallet for three years until it rotted away?"
"Not three years, it...wait, how'd you know about that?"
She shook her hair back, a lurid gold wave in the red dashboard lights. "Wild guess."
She cocked her head and stared at him saying nothing, her breasts rising and falling in the indescribably luxurious and unobtainable interior of the old Caddy. Then she said, "What would you have given to have that happen just once?"
"Given? You mean like... Well, I didn't really have anything. But, no I see... Anything. Anything I owned."
"You have things now, don't you?"
"Well, I'm comfortable you know. Well off."
She leaned forward, here breasts compressing against the window jamb, her lips slightly parted at a level just below his belt, her eyes shining up at him. "What would you give now?"
"Now? You mean, at this point?"
"No, I mean now. Right fucking now."
"I'd have to go by my bank machine."
"You bet, sugar. Here, you drive."

Let's see... In a big red convert able. Her hooker name should be Cinnamon Spice. Or Big Red. Haha.

It makes her rates cheeper of course. Or that they get to see the town while having a good time....
Ok those sucked. Sorry, Ox. I'll try to think of a better one later on... The wrong writer has the best idea methinks.

Thanks to all, especially The Wrong Writer. I shouldn't have said that she wanted to work as a hooker, as that was slightly misleading. Although, having said that, TWW, I'm going to see if I can work something in along the lines of what you've written, as it's brilliant.

But I needed to explain more, and have started a second thread dealing with the lead-up to the topic of this thread.