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10-10-2006, 11:49 PM
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#31
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Member
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 22
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I would, but I'm too scared.
Can you please tell me what 1+1 equals?
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10-11-2006, 02:01 AM
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#32
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Apr 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,358
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I would, but I'm afraid I can't read or write.
Would someone mind sending me roses?
__________________
Every artist is a cannibal; Every poet is a thief All kill the inspiration; and sing about the grief - U2
Say what you mean, and mean what you say.
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10-11-2006, 12:21 PM
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#33
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Addict
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: The Pacific Ocean
Gender: Male
Posts: 106
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I'd love to, but you did not specify what color, thus I cannot.
Could you please inject me with large amounts of morphine?
__________________
The greatest irony of life is that no one lives through it.
Depressed yet? 
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10-15-2006, 03:50 PM
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#34
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Best Seller
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Between sandy beaches and rolling hills of the U.S.
Gender: Female
Posts: 562
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I'd love to but I'm not a certified nurse or a user, so I might kill you.
Plus needles make me faint.
Can you hand me the smelling salts?
__________________
Quote:
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I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
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-Groucho Marx
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11-04-2006, 07:20 PM
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#35
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Writer
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Arkansas
Gender: Female
Posts: 38
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Id love to but they stink like something died in there! *gnarls up face and pinches nose, while turning away*
Can you please send me a letter in the mail?
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11-04-2006, 08:41 PM
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#36
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Member
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Alaska
Posts: 12
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I'd love to but I can't. See this dude was feeding my dog table scraps even though I told him not to, which isn't that big of deal, but you see I'm a cannibal and now my dog has a taste for human flesh, and you know how dogs love letter carriers! Alas, the letter carrier won't keep near my house no matter how many stamps I put on it.
Could you please start my car and warm it up a bit?
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11-04-2006, 08:47 PM
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#37
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,549
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I'd love to but I was a witness to a robbery at the bank down the road & when they started shooting at me I jumped into a monster truck sitting at the lights, pushed the driver out on the road & took off over the traffic. Unfortunately there was one of those F150's in the way & it veered me off course & I managed to run over, & squash, your car.
Can you please enrol me in the witness program?
__________________
*He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway) 
*Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words? - Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
*Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it - Moses Hadas
*He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know - Abraham Lincoln
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11-04-2006, 08:53 PM
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#38
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Scribe
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Canada
Gender: Private
Posts: 57
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I'd love to look after little Johnny but my ex, the convicted pedophil who is finally out of jail, again, is coming by to pick up his things.
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11-05-2006, 01:04 PM
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#39
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Prolific Writer
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Greenland, Greenwich, Sandwich
Gender: Male
Posts: 394
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I'd love to but I'm a compulsive cannibal, and the doctor says if I eat anything else that is high in sugar I could become diabetic.
__________________
My Fiction My Poetry(Comedy/Bitter)
Explicate! <--Explicative Poetry in need of helpful reviewin
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11-06-2006, 10:18 AM
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#40
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Writer
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Arkansas
Gender: Female
Posts: 38
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arent we supposed to ask the next person to do something for us so they can write the next exscuse?? :confused:
back on topic...
can you please go get me a beer?? |
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11-06-2006, 10:21 AM
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#41
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Addict
Join Date: Nov 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 100
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I'd love to but I'm afraid that you're underage.
---
Could you stop posting on the forums?
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11-06-2006, 10:32 AM
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#42
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Writer
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Arkansas
Gender: Female
Posts: 38
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Id love to but I have this illness known as magnet butt. Every time I sit here at the comp my butt magnetizes to the chair and I cant get up.
could you please take my truck to be serviced??
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11-06-2006, 07:11 PM
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#43
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Addict
Join Date: Nov 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 100
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Sorry, the service station is on fire.
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Could you cut my meatloaf?
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11-07-2006, 12:06 PM
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#44
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Writer
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Arkansas
Gender: Female
Posts: 38
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Id love to but I just cut my hand off with the knife, not to worry though the blood mixes well with the ketchup. 
could you please dial 911?? |
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11-07-2006, 02:32 PM
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#45
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Prolific Writer
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: stranded in cyberspace.
Gender: Female
Posts: 311
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I'd love to but obviuosly you don't need it if you are on the computer.besudes what would I tell them? I don't know your address.
could you pour yourself some hotchocolate for once?
__________________
well, no more plot holes yeah!Now just for editing...
my website is writerhopeful.piczo.com
Last edited by Quillpen : 11-07-2006 at 06:23 PM.
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