ARussell

Dark Castle Fantasty Writing Contest




I started this contest on a game development forum, but haven't had much luck with the replies. Perhaps some of you would be interested?: http://www.coniserver.net/ubbthreads...28b#Post657983

Firstly, the good bit:


-PRIZES!

***** First Prize *******
US$50 via Paypal or equivalent in online shopping for those without Payplay.

The winner will also be contacted about a job to do writing for the
project. The game wil have four cut-scenes, three endings, and the writer will
also be consulted about world building and quests that lead to each way point in
his or her story.
Note: it might not be the winner who takes the job. If not it will be offered to
the best entrants.

***** All Challengers ******
Everyone who enters gets a free licence for Pachinko a Go Go! strip or regular
edition (depending if toon nudity is legal where you are and for your age)
*provided you make a serious entry




-WICKED! What do I do to win?

Write a very short story, a few paragraphs or half a page or so, for an opening
cut scene for my game concept. Please try to keep it under one page.



-AWESOME! What's it about?

This is a family game for learningEnglish as a second language. It is designed
for a family audience.


-COOL BANANAS! What do I write?




Basis of the story:
The player and her sidekick, the flying weasel are in a garden in an enchanted
forest. The first cut scene will feature the horrible, utterly despicable,
completely evil wizard, who will come into the garden and turn some
cute furry animals into slavering monsters. He will then say something utterly
evil and despicable and run away or disappear. In the garden also is a sign post
with two signs on it. "Eat these mushrooms," and "Don't eat those mushroomS."
Eating the good mushrooms does something to make the player more powerful,
eating the bad ones makes something funny happen, like the player turns blue,
grows donkey ears or is hit by an uncontrallable attack of the giggles.

NOTE: This is a suggestion. If you have a cooler idea, you can write that.



Here's a more complete concept:

As an RPG, it is a single player, 3d ,3rd person game, set in a vibrant fantasy
world. It is a story about good versus evil where you play an intrepid magician
on a quest to save the world. You will need to find your way through the
enchanted forests, searching for clues, collecting magical treasures and talking
to fantastic creatures. Along the way you will avoid perilous traps and battle
the evil forces that oppose you efforts to reach The Dark Castle and defeat the
horrible, utterly despicable, completely evil wizard who dwells within.

The game is set in a world that is a super-future of our own, which was
destroyed somehow by war or natural disaster and after a long long long long
time, re-awakened with humans alongside fantasy creatures like dwarves ,elves,
pixies and so on. In this world, palyers quest for parts of an ancient book that
has magical properties to endow the palyer with greater powers.

A horrible, utterly despicable, completely evil wizard has been turning cute
furry animals into hideous, scary monsters. Parts of the books are guarded by
these monsters. The monsters need to be defeated with magic to turn them back
into furry animals.

Ultimately, the player's quests lead to The Dark Castle, from which the
horrible, utterly despicable, completely evil wizard is making his magic.


The Characters:
Cat girl: "Nyara" Doesn't know much Engish, and is pretty cluless, but she is
cute, fun and a powerful magician.
The flying weasel: Cat girl's familiar, "CUI" Not very strong, but is a
"champion and a scholar" from a famous academy, and he is very knowledgable and
helpful.
The horrible, utterly despicable, completely evil wizard: That's what he is.
Embelish on these.


WHO WINS? The winning entry will ultimately be chosen by me, however it will
also depend on possitive feedback from forum members.


Legal Crap: Authors maintain all rights to stories submitted for this contest.


Contest ends: 8th of June 2006.


This project is currently looking good for funding. If it's a go, I would like to employ a writer on the team. This competition is to find some potential talent.

Post here or at the game dev forum. I'll check back.

Thanks

cacafire

Right. Count me in.

__________________
Critique my pieces, and I'll gladly return the favor: Mita of the sky: II, Gloving_Country, Shared Qualms(check this one out!), Gloving country-II, , Capoeira, Father and Son, Silence Come, The Lad I Knew

ARussell

Please do. I just read a couple of your links, they were really good.

TheReMonstor

This sounds interesting enough, and I have a deep passion for vgames, so I'd love to help out. But here's the problem I think. There's a difference between a script and a story. If I were to write an opening scene in story form, it would read something like:

Nyara rummaged through her leather satchel, searching for the ivory lute that had been given as a gift. The light breeze tossed her hair about her shoulders. Finally she found what she was looking for.
"Hurray! Play the Flower Song!" Cui, her weasal familiar, danced with glee around her feet.
"But of course," she said with a smile. Her lips pursed against the instrument and a soothing tone filled the small garden.

Now that's prose. But if you were to adapt that to a videogame, all the details would be converted to things happening in and around the characters while only the dialogue would be used as actually writing. So, I'm thinking that as a writer for a videogame, it's probably more along the lines of a script, kind of like how you might write a comic book. So which would you like? A complete narrative of the game or more of an outline w/ an emphasis on dialogue?

Like I said, I'd really like to help out. These characters (warm & fuzzy) aren't something I'm used to writing, but I'd be more than willing to try my hand at. I'm guessing that b/c you have it as a contest, you'll want it more in a complete story form. You said:

NOTE: This is a suggestion. If you have a cooler idea, you can write that.

Does that mean still using your characters, just a different opening for the game?

__________________

ARussell

Yes, the actual job of writing for an RPG is different from the competition. It's easy and entertaining to read a short peice of prose for people watching the competition, and it is enough to get an idea of how the story would be if you wrote it.

Yes, the characters already have some artwork invested in them so we don't want to change her into Hephalump Girl and have to re-draw her . And, yes again, you can make a completely different opening if you like.

I'm looking forward to reading your story.

ARussell

It seems most of the responses on the other forum are quite clueless, so please do write something. I should have only posted on author forums like this.

I'll give the details of what you need to write for the game script, what world building and AIML scripting needs to be done after the comp. In fact I'll show the prospective writer most of the design document.

Cheers, and looking forward to reading your work.

cacafire

You'll probably notice that my entry is a little more mature in writing style. That's because I thought the videogame would benefit with a more mature description of the world and events. It's still family friendly, but It's not sickeningly cute, as so many pc games that bomb are. If you look closely, you'll see that the dialogue isn't that mature, which is intentional. It is a kids game, right? The wizard, on the other hand, would be for the older kids. The wizard's english is like the "level 3", while Cui is "level 2", and nyara's language is "level 1". Hope you like.

:Begin:

Shared Qualms

"Travel to the outskirts of Varjina, my little one. There, I shall be waiting for you." Those words echoed through solomon's head, increasing the solemnity of his expression. Thunder clapped in the distance, accompanied by a brilliant flash of light, as could be seen from the tower Solomon now stood in. He did not see it, though, and instead turned away from the gaint window. There was no glass, and cold wind whipped through the room, bringing with it the salt spray from the ocean below. Yet, Solomon stayed erect. He kept his old, graying body rigid as an oak, and contemplated the drab coldness of the hard stone walls. The words of Vin rang incessantly through his mind, and his face twisted in mortifiying fear.

"Could Vin know of my plan?" He spoke out loud, his voice hollow and vacuous. Then he turned, facing the window, and the lifeless landscape of the mountains along the shoreline. He flung his bony arm outward, causing the long cloth swimming on his body to ripple. Pointing to someplace in the distance, his sharp eyes cutting in the distance, he spoke: "Go," Solomon's eyes grew harsh, swelling with inky blackness, "bring the girl to me."

The harrowing screech of something horrible filled the room, whipped the stone of it, seeming to dare the storm to break. Then, launching out the window, it was gone.

* * *

Descending quickly over the mountain, dark clouds brewed, making it hard for Nyara to see. She gasped for breath as she scrambled over fallen logs and other obstacles, while the forest brooded over her presence, seemingly watching her every mood, eagerly awaiting a mistake. Finally, she sat, panting from her run. "Resting already, I see." Nyara looked up and frowned.

"You're not tired, Cui?" A weasel shot out of the brush, hovering in the air on feathery wings. His eyes darted from side to side, regarding everything with suspicion. Still, Cui finally stopped flapping and lowered himself onto the rock Nyara sat on.

"You tire easily, M'lady." She gave him a sharp look, but ended up bursting in laughter when he made the face. Cui laughed as well, leaning back on the rock and slumped himself against her side. "Ahh... such soft cloth. I have always fancied what it might be like to wear clothing, M'lady. But it's no use wondering, now that he's after us." Cui gave a long sigh.

Nyara laughed slightly, but now wasn't in the mood. At the mention of him, she stiffened considerably, and began to sniffle a little. "That horrible wizard! That's why we must get to varijna."

"And why we must not waste time sitting in a forest, M'lady." Cui stretched his wings and propelled himself back in the air. "Well, now, See? I've already got my second wind." Nyara ignored him, and concentrated instead on focusing her own breathing. While she thought, she tied her hair back into a tail to prevent it from falling in her eyes. They had to leave Guna too soon; They hadn't been able to get adequate supplies. Suddenly, something caught her eye, then vanished. Nyara instantly snapped to her feet, looking to the sky. "What is it, Ny?"

Nyara's eyes scanned the horizon above the mountain's tree line. Indeed, what was it? The only way to Varjina was through this mountain pass. "Cui... you don't think solomon... would be expecting us--would you?" The cat girl and her familiar's eyes met, passed information instantly. Then, it happened again; the sky, like something invisible, but not quite, shifted. Nyara concentrated her magics in a flurry of motion, queitly chanting the first spell she had learned in Guna: Reveal.

Nyara finished chanting and targeted the magical energy where the shimmer had been. Suddenly, it all came clear. A horrible screech shattered the brooding silence, and the matsadon swiftly swooped down on them. "Look out!" Cui screamed. Nyara dived low to the ground, barely missing the monsters claws. It flew back up and made ready for another pass. "Run!" Cui flew down to nyara and helped her up.

"Ouch..." She rubbed her head. The matsadon got ready. Nyara made a flurry of gestures, and produced another spell. "Fatimina Ruquina!" She pushed her hands outward, and a brilliant flash of light blinded the creature. It fell down to the forest floor with a loud thump, and scrambled to get back up. Nyara and Cui ran off, dodging trees and leaves and things you couldn't imagine, until they came to a large clearing. Inside the clearing were two rows of mushrooms, each with two signs above them.

Nyare kneeled over, clutching her chest and gasping for air. "That was too close for comfort." Cui stated, as if they hadn't just been targeted by one of Solomon's victims. Solomon's victims...Nyara closed her eyes. It had been horrible what Solomon had done to that village, turning all the animals into slaves of his ambitions. She balled her hands into fists. They must get to Varjina. "Say... take a look over here!" Cui said.

Nyare opened her eyes to see what Cui pointed at. "Are those... Mushrooms?" Suddenly, the screech was back. Nyara and Cui heard the matsadon clawing it's way through the underbrush. Nyara turned to Cui, "Which one do I eat?" She pleaded.

"Who cares!?" Cui torted, "They're both the same color! Hurry!"

"No, you numdum!" She pointed at the two signs, "Which one is better?" The matsadson snarled, snapping at the thought of pleasing it's master. Cui took out his glasses, and scanned each sign. Nyara fluttered her hands and cast another spell; It didn't work. The Maatsadon was just feet away from the clearing. "Cui...!"

"I'm hurrying! I'm hurrying!"

"less talk, more hurry!" The matsadon reached the clearing. Cui pointed at the sign on the right:

"That one say's to eat the mushroom." Nyara rushed over, just as the matsadon's sharp talons closed over her waist, and popped the mushroom into her mouth. Cui tried to attack it, but was kicked across the clearing.

"Nyara!!!" he screamed.

"It's all right." She smiled, and cast the new spell.

:end:

That's it. Let the judging begin.

-Cacafire

__________________
Critique my pieces, and I'll gladly return the favor: Mita of the sky: II, Gloving_Country, Shared Qualms(check this one out!), Gloving country-II, , Capoeira, Father and Son, Silence Come, The Lad I Knew

FrankBlissett

Here's a couple quick ideas:

++++

STORY 1

Nyara tethered her pony to an old post and peered into the old garden.

She turned back to her pony and said, "you wait here. I'll only be a moment."

Inside the garden a little chicken chased a big bug, while somewhere in a hedge a starling was practicing the latest songs. Nyara wanted to stay there for the rest of the day, listening to the birds and smelling the perfume of the flowers, but knew that she couldn't linger long.

"CUI, are you there?"

"No - I'm over here little one."

The little weasel bounded over to Nyara, unfolded his wings and leapt atop the split-rail fence.

"Now, little kitten, how may I be of assistance, or how can I help you as it were?"

"Not for me. For my Nana. She needs some herbs. I just can't remember if she needed them for stew or for flu!"

"Hmm - a bit of a conundrum, or a problem as it were." CUI scratched his chin and said, "I know. I can give you herbs that can be used for either flu or stew."

Nyara clapped with joy and said, "That would be great!"

All of the sudden, a horrible buzzing screeched through the sky and little shadows flung themselves through the garden in a spiral, merging into a great, dark figure.

"Stranger, your entrance here was dramatic, or exciting as it were, but a bit too loud I don't mind saying."

"Then I won't stay long. I just need one, little thing."

The stranger pointed to a clump of horseradish. The plants parted, revealing the little chicken.

"Ahh - chickens can hide, but not for long."

A rainbow of sparks jumped from the stranger's hands, surrounding the little chicken. The chicken's feathers turned into rows of spines and her body became covered with scales. Her feet turned to talons, her beak turned big and crooked and she grew a stubby, little tail.

"You didn't recognize me, CUI, did you. I'm Sitani - long gone, and almost forgotten," He turned to that which had been a chicken just a moment before and bellowed, "Cockatrice! Come!"

With a loud buzz, Sitani burst into little shadows, which flew over the trees, with the Cockatrice following behind.

"Come Nyara! There's no time to lose. We must make haste to your Nana's cottage, or get there quickly as it were."

++++

STORY 2

"But CUI, I hate cleaning the chicken coop," Nyara whined as she took a shovel and bucket from the garden shed.

"Now little kitten, if you enjoyed it then it wouldn't be punishment, would it. You were the one who engaged in a bit of fisticuffs this morning, or got into a fight as it were."

"But Rienne gets to help in the kitchen! It's no fair."

"That's because Rienne hates working in the kitchen. As your counselor, it's my duty to counsel you. To guide you, as it were."

As Nyara came around to the front of the chicken coop, she stopped suddenly and gasped.

"CUI! One of the chickens is sick."

The chicken's feathers were turning into rows of spines and its body covered with scales. Her feet were turning to talons, her beak becoming big and crooked and she grew a stubby, little tail.

Then they noticed the little, grey man sitting in the doorway to the chicken coop.

CUI's fur ruffled and he growled out "Prefri! Leave this place forthwith."

Prefri shrugged "As you wish. Cockatrice - bow for me."

The former chicken, now a beast, coughed up a disgusting mass, allowed Prefri onto her back and took to the sky.

"Hurry Nyara - pack your personal effects, or your belongings as it were, and meet me at the headmaster's office."

++++

I used the lines with CUI to teach some vocab, and tried to incorporate a little rhyme and alliteration into the prose.

Suggested music would be the old fiddle tune "Cluck Old Hen". MIDI versions can readily be found. With a budget, a musician can be hired to compose variations on this theme for joyous or scary times involving the "Cockatrice".

After story 1, you could have a module of the game that teaches directions (cardinal directions, plus left, right, up, down etc) on the way to her grandmother's house.

-Frank
frankbliss at 30below dot com

ARussell

Thanks for submitting those great stories, Cacafire and Frank.

I thought some of you might be interested to know that there are some people who write scripts for games for a living: http://www.gamasutra.com/features/20.../ince_01.shtml

Magnatolia

Nyara found herself standing in a sunlit field surrounded by towering trees. Her companion, a weasel named Cui basked atop a small tree stump. Before her lay two mushrooms, one with a sign telling her to eat it, the other a sign warning to not touch it. And yet she felt a force compelling her to approach the mushroom with the warning. Cui watched in horror as Nyara approached the cursed mushroom.

“Don’t touch it.” Cui threw himself at her and grabbed her feet.

“Looks so you yummy, Cui.” She pulled herself along the ground, ignoring the protesting Cui who still clung to her feet.

Nyara grabbed the mushroom, and giggled. “Mine…all mine.” It wasn’t until Cui squealed and scurried up her legs that she noticed the cloaked figure approaching.

“Ahahaha. Your foolish human greed has cost this world greatly, and everybody who lives here.”

Horror washed over Nyara’s face. “Who are you? What do you want?” She petted the fretting Weasel.

“I am your worst nightmare. Bear witness to the powers of Calef. Now watch as I remove the English language from existence.” He held out a leather book flicked through the pages. Thousands of words swarmed out of the book, blowing in all directions. Nyara tried to speak but no words came forth.

Calef rose up into the air, and began chanting, a strange ominous sound that left an odd ringing sensation in Nyara's ears. All around her, trees began to change. Vines wrapped themselves around trunks. Animals began to change, turning into strange creatures, snarling and snapping.

“Oh how I love a good hunt. I will give you a small chance to repent for your crimes. Find me and I will turn your world back into its pretty state.” A small sword and shield magically strapped themselves to her back. The book of english lay beside her, its pages devoid of words.

-----------------------------------------------------

I don't know if this is what you were looking for. Obviously a lot of the descriptive text would actually be 'seen' not read. And I don't know what the 'educational' goal was. I've assumed you want to teach people about english. Well this gives you a perfect solution. That way the puzzles can be word based (for example, they have to obtain certain words and put them into a coherent sentence in order to cast a spell). Basically the book allows the player to find the missing words.

Let me know if this is what you were looking for.

Regards
J

ARussell

We're getting some great stories here.

There is still some confusion about the RPG writing part. Right now I'm just looking for fun, and hopefully funny and original writing. A writer who can invoke some emotion in the reader -make them laugh, jerk a tear. I love reading books because writers are the best at moving their audience.

Of course, actually writing an RPG is quite different. There is some boring stuff, like writing all the things that NPCs can say. You can't be a traditionally cloistered writer. You can't just write anything, because it is a collaborative effort. There are 2d artists, 3d artists, level designers, game designers, producers, helicopter pilots, makeup artists, miniskirt policegirls -well okay, not all of those- all working together. There are parameters to work within, like what is possible within the bounds of the game -one small idea from you could be many hours work for everyone else! That is why I asked for the story to be based on existing concept artwork. In the case of this game, there will also be bounds on the level of English you can present to the player (no more than 400 (low level) words in the entire game, certain structures need to be emphasised, troublesome things like that). Other writing is more like witing a cartoon or play, like for cut scenes. There will need to be an overall synopsis. Quests to play out. All in a non-linear fashion, quite different to a book or a movie.

For now, just think of a fun scene. Preferably cute. Valiant heros questing against dark lord's intent on taking over the world is no fun if you take it seriously. Cat girl and flying weasle hardly look as serious as a character like Kaina, priestess warrior of the jungle with plate mail bosoms +3 and two hand axe of lizard slaying +5.

Anyway, there aren't many stories coming in now. If no-one objects, I'd like to bring the end of the contest up to this Thurday, June 8th. I'll announce the winner early next week.

Magnatolia

Sorry mate, but I could do with some clarification.

First off, exactly what is the target audience? I got the understanding that you were trying to teach people english through the game (edutainment type of thing) which is the angle I used in my scene, but that can be changed.

Anyway, as I mentioned in my post a lot of the descriptive text would be shown through the actual scene.

Regards
J

ARussell

This is for a family game for people who need to study Engish as a second language. I thought I wrote that in the first post, but I could be wrong.

"Edutainment" is a dirty word, usually synonymous with "boring Cr&%." I like to call it a non-linear, extensible language learning applictation based within the context of a fun, fantasy RPG.

ARussell

I've posted a poll for everyone to vote for their favorite story. You can view it and cast your vote here: http://www.coniserver.net/ubbthreads...0&vc=1&fpart=1

cacafire

I'm just bumping this so I can find it more easily when the winners are announced.

__________________
Critique my pieces, and I'll gladly return the favor: Mita of the sky: II, Gloving_Country, Shared Qualms(check this one out!), Gloving country-II, , Capoeira, Father and Son, Silence Come, The Lad I Knew