rumpole40k

Hi,

I've been writing for two years now. In the last year, my son was born. Up to then I always wrote between five and six in the morning. With the new baby, I'm finding it almost impossible to keep this schedule. As a result my writing has suffered. I've talked to a few friends of mine and they all have said the same thing. Although the exact words vary it basically boils down to, "Hey you're a dad now. It happens." Personally, I can't except this. Writing isn't my profession, but rather a passion that has allowed me to begin saving for my son's education and improve my family's quality of life. I can't be the only one who has gone through this. So my question is, how do you carve out time to write?

Thanks in advance,

Rumpole40k

SadLuckDame

I write whenever I need to get it out, even on the back of an old envelope if it is the only thing available. You could try carrying around a small, pocket sized notepad and pen. Jot down any thoughts, even brief ones, small size for on the go.

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JohnN

Tough one. How about for an hour after the baby sleeps...maybe 11pm-12pm

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Plucko

I always write whenever I feel like it — at random times. Perhaps you should write when the baby is asleep?

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OddGodHMK

I personally write in my free periods, lunch and occasionally break at college, and then more when I'm home if I feel like it. Unfortunately, though, that doesn't help your situation. Why not write in five minute chunks whenever you get a free minute? I'll build up quickly.

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vignettepress

As often as I can, which is never often enough. It's my resolution this year to set aside more time for writing, though, so hopefully that will change soon!

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Erik Buchanan

The first year after my daughter was born, my writing went to hell, too. It does happen, but it's something that you can solve.

First, work out a schedule with your wife. She is on duty from Time A to Time B each day, and you are free to write. In exchange, you are on duty from Time X to Time Y each day, and she is free to do other things.

During your writing time, wear ear phones or plugs or whatever to keep the baby's sounds from distracting you.

Second, make sure you take advantage of that time every day to keep your writing going. And don't worry. Once the kid is in a regular sleep/wake pattern, things improve.

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Alex Kostin

My advice:

Forget about writing now. You have a baby for God's Sake! Think about him!

jlstratton

I agree with Erik Buchanan in that you should try and find some kind of schedule. Failing that, it must become an obsession. The muse will become almost like a secret affair where you will plan your time, sneak out when you can to rapidly plug away for a limited time.

My writing suffered for a long time since I have two children born close together but I found that planning time like this allows you to get something done. I also spend time thinking about a project at hand even when I am not writing. I use the time right before falling to sleep to go over a section and plan for the next scene or event in my story. I know it sounds a little hookie but sometimes I actually sort out paragraphs and events in my sleep. Then I just do the best I can to remember it the next day until I can write it out.

Hope this helps. Unfortunately, you are not alone in this plight. Most of us older folks have had to deal with things like this for a long time. Just wait till you get older and you forget entire blocks of thought that you thought were important moments before.

"It's been said that your memory is the second thing to go ... I can't remember the first." Unknown

JL Stratton

jlstratton

I hate to say it, Alex but for some, writing is a part of their being. If you truly enjoy it on this level then you cannot just give it up without it causing problems elsewhere, ie. bitterness, other addictions. Some people have a deep need to express themselves through the written word and suffer if not allowed to do so. If we did not have people like this writing then we would have very little reading material available out there. We all know how difficult it can be to get work published and it requires enough motivation and persistance that it weeds those out that are just doing it for the money.

Talia_Brie

Yes, time to invest in a laptop.

We've got a new baby in the house now, 6 weeks old. What I'm trying to do is take care of the 4.00 am feed, then I can stay up and write until 6.00 am when I have to get ready for work.

That's the best advice I can give you. I recently started writing in a notebook to get around this. It just meant I could write on the train and during my lunchbreak at work. Initially that worked for me, but now, like yourself, I'm finding it difficult to find time to transpose it onto the computer so I can edit it properly.

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rumpole40k

Thanks everyone,

Your advice was very helpful (as was the ability to voice my problem to people who understand). I've started going to sleep early (no later than nine (the little man's asleep by 7:30 - 8:00), and getting up at 5. It gives me at least an hour each morning.

Thanks again

Rumpole40k

A Gypsy's Abandon

I wish you the best of luck, Rumpole.

I recently purchased a refurb laptop off eBay because I just wasn't finding the time to sit and write. I have a time conflict issue that doesn't involve a baby (but a barn full of horses that require care, plus a full time job, plus family obligations and a small online business). I find that my only time to write is when I am sitting up in bed before I go to sleep - it's not a problem because previously, I was writing it all out in hand and then having to type it out the next time I had a chance to sit at the desktop. I am not even bothering to hook this laptop up to the internet, just use a flash drive to get my work where it needs to be (and always, always save my work on the flash drive because I don't 100% trust the $200, 6 year old laptop, but it serves it's purpose). I reckon when I can actually make something worthwhile of my novel, if I get it published, then I'll buy a laptop with all the fancy bells and whistles. Til now, it services my most basic needs.

It sounds like you've found a good way to balance everything - I hope that you can continue to do so so you don't miss out on the best parts of your son's life!

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SeattleCPA

Boy, as someone who has been way too compulsive about writing and missed some of my daughters' early years as a result, I have to say that I agree with Alex Kostin... Enjoy your new baby...

Er, can I say that the Wall Street Journal once called me the Louis L'Amour of computer books because I'd written so many (too many) books? I mean, that's kind of funny. But it's not really what you want to have people say about you.

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ClancyBoy

I have a baby, and I am able to take care of him, hold a job, feed myself, AND sleep for several hours a night. Babies don't make everything stop.

Er, correction. They do make everything stop pretty frequently, but then they go back to sleep and things start back up again.

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