Book done, now to the hard part. The first line and the title... *sigh* - Writers Forum

WriterDude · 12-04-2007, 06:48 AM

I always have big problem with these two, and I know I can't be the only one. The overal story isn't so hard, and writing the damn book is often very easy. It's just these two things I have a major problem with. The title itself, and the very first line. Even the character's names are usually easy to find.

The synopsis on the back of the book should make you want to read the book, but that's just a general idea of the story. What draws your attention in the first place is the title, so in many ways it's the most important part of the book. No one wants to buy a book with a random, generic title that doesn't really tell them anything. Just yesterday my brother gave me a book called "Heart shaped box", about a guy who bought a ghost on the internet. The story sounds cool, but c'mon. "Heart shaped box"? There's no way I would even have given it a chance on my own.

So how do you do it? How do you come up with a title that automatically draws the reader's attention?

Second, there's the first line. You have a book you think could be fun, and then start reading. The first line sounds boring, and already being disappointed, you often stop reading after a short while. It could of course pick up soon and be great, but then again so could the other two dozen books you haven't read yet. (maybe that's just me, but you know...)

What we need is a line that draws the reader right into the story, kinda like opening a door for the reader and locking it behind him or her as soon as he or she steps through.

I generally try to start with some action or dialogue. (and in one case, with a yawn.) Dialogue kinda draws the reader in, or at least that's how I feel it. You already know something is going on, and when the dialogue is over you have already started reading. Might as well continue, eh? Other times I've started with pure action, like a guy being thrown of a roof on a very tall building, or almost being run over by a car.

When I was young, I used to read books about a guy named Stephen Lane. His uncle was a spy or something (a bit James Bond style, although without the ladies), and the books always started right in the middle of the story during an intense action scene. Shortly after it jumped back to the beginning and continue as normal. The action scene from the beginning always showed up later in the book, so we always knew something big was going to happen. I thought that was excellent, as even if the beginning was a bit boring, we knew it would pick up a lot in a short while.

So again, how do you do it? How do you find a great title and a first line in your books?

slayerofangels · 12-04-2007, 07:00 AM

Depends on the scene you're trying to write. If you want to get straight into the action, then dialogue is probably the way to go, as would the whole starting at the end and looking back approach. If you wanted to take your time with it, and introduce characters/settings over a longer period, a more descriptive approach might work.

As for the title, I just go with a randomish phrase until something better comes to mind.

JohnN · 12-04-2007, 07:32 AM

For the first line I like starting with something that makes the reader think what happened before....

So starting with something like "it was raining and he looked out the window" is wrong because I don't have a need to know what happened before.

However, an action scene would grab me "he swung his sword".

------

As for the tittle thats a tough one, depends on the book! If its an epic then you need a grand title. Think of what the book makes your feel and try and embody that in the title.

Non Serviam · 12-04-2007, 08:43 AM

Don't worry about the title. No matter what you choose to call it, your editor will change the title anyway.

For the first line, you could always go with the formula:

(Name of character) + (dynamic verb) + (unexpected image).

---> Wild Bill Kickok pulled up his pants and lit a cigarette. "Now that's why a mare's better than a woman," he told his horse.

Or you could go straight for dialogue, provided it drops the reader straight into conflict.

---> "Jesus Christ, John, get your fucking hands off my tits!" said Emma.

WriterDude · 12-04-2007, 08:53 AM

Thanks... I guess.

Typing a general, random title until something better comes along sounds fine, but what if the book is finished and I still don't have a title? And sure the editor might change it, but that is no reason to send in a manuscript without a title at all. Even if I did, do you really think he would bother read it?

As for the first scene, I write pretty much whatever I want without putting in a category. I usually stick to an overal genre, but just because I write a horror story, it doesn't mean I can't have some comedy or romance as well. Or vice versa, a romance novel can have horror elements if I feel like it.

(never have, but that's not the point.)

Joe Moore · 12-04-2007, 09:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Non Serviam

Don't worry about the title. No matter what you choose to call it, your editor will change the title anyway.

For the first line, you could always go with the formula:

(Name of character) + (dynamic verb) + (unexpected image).

---> Wild Bill Kickok pulled up his pants and lit a cigarette. "Now that's why a mare's better than a woman," he told his horse.

Or you could go straight for dialogue, provided it drops the reader straight into conflict.

---> "Jesus Christ, John, get your fucking hands off my tits!" said Emma.

This is great advice from Non Serviam. In each of these funny but useful examples, I would be hard pressed not to want to read the next sentence.
Here's a couple of general rules concerning first lines. Keep in mind that all "rules" regarding writing are subject to interpretation.
1. Try to establish time, place and POV in the first line or at least the first paragraph.
2. Never start a story with a weather report.
Good luck.

PS. Don't sweat the title. That's the publisher's job.

12-05-2007, 03:19 PM

Quote:

Don't worry about the title. No matter what you choose to call it, your editor will change the title anyway.

Are you serious?

Being a noob to all this I hope that isn't the case with mine.

Non Serviam · 12-05-2007, 05:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by duck

Are you serious?

Completely.

Joe Moore · 12-05-2007, 05:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by duck

Are you serious? Being a noob to all this I hope that isn't the case with mine.

Once you sign a publishing contract, your book is now in the hands of the publisher and they make the decisions concerning title, cover art, marketing, sales strategy, and a hundred other things that it takes to get it to market. Why? Because it THEIR money and THEY are taking all the risk from that point on. So they get to call all the shots when it comes to the business of publishing a book. That's not to say that the writer will be able to input ideas and suggestions. But the best thing you can do once you sign that contract is start your next book. Good luck.

CaptainFreedom · 12-05-2007, 05:48 PM

hey looky looky - Joe's got another book down there.

CF

Joe Moore · 12-05-2007, 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CaptainFreedom

hey looky looky - Joe's got another book down there. CF

Thanks for noticing, Captain. Yes, we're close to finishing up book 4 in the Cotten Stone thriller series and it's scheduled for release in October 08. Our pub just announced a week or so ago that the title will be THE 731 LEGACY. We should get our first look at the cover within the next 30 days. So mark your calendars for October 1, 2008.

12-05-2007, 08:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Non Serviam

Completely.

I have titled it (for query letter purposes, I guess) Time Well Wasted: The Story of 1st Platoon, 10th MP Co. in Somalia.

I hope they keep it!

Truth-Teller · 12-05-2007, 09:24 PM

What's the point if your title is good, but your whole story is shit?

12-05-2007, 09:27 PM

Truth was that to me?

Because if it was it was a bit out of line.

Joe Moore · 12-05-2007, 10:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by duck

I have titled it (for query letter purposes, I guess) Time Well Wasted: The Story of 1st Platoon, 10th MP Co. in Somalia.
I hope they keep it!

Duck, is your book non-fiction? Your title sound intriguing. Hopefully you'll get to keep it. Good luck.