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Old 05-15-2006, 10:18 PM   #1
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Writing Action Scenes

Hello,
This may seem like a stupid question, but how do you go about writing action scenes? Most of my scenes of action have fighting in them. Either fist/foot fights or sword fights. I am unsure how to write the scenes out. Do I do a punch for punch method? And do I name the moves used? IE round house kick, upper cut and the like?

Thank you for all help in advance.
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Old 05-16-2006, 10:20 AM   #2
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Yes.
If you write action in your stories, I'm surprised you're not telling us how to do it, rather than the other way around.
You always need to specify what is happening, but do it with breaks, and interesting ones.
Don't say: "They started into an ardent battle, fists were flying." Instead say:
"Lena leapt backwards, barely dodging the scimitar as it grazed her shoulder. Palomides' eyes flashed menacingly, and then grew wide in shock as Lena's fist slammed into his cheek, leather-bound knuckles breaking skin."
That makes it more interesting, and the reader can get sucked into the battle, instead of only seeing it happening from an outside point of view.
Only use the actual names of the moves if it's imporant. if you use "roundhouse kick" and "upper-cut" and "karate-chop" just because every paragraph, then we'll start rolling our eyes.
You're not using the scene to show off what you know about fighting, you're using it as a driving scene in your story.

Good luck,

Q
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Old 05-16-2006, 10:33 AM   #3
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I only think an action scene is written badly if I notice it at all. So I guess the basics apply; keep it succinct and don't try and dazzle me with mechanics. If 'punch' will do, don't use 'uppercut'.
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Old 05-16-2006, 11:56 AM   #4
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As in most things, less is more. You're not writing stage directions, or choreographing. Keep things brisk and keep them moving.
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Old 05-16-2006, 02:00 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Quillqueen
Yes.
If you write action in your stories, I'm surprised you're not telling us how to do it, rather than the other way around.
You always need to specify what is happening, but do it with breaks, and interesting ones.
Don't say: "They started into an ardent battle, fists were flying." Instead say:
"Lena leapt backwards, barely dodging the scimitar as it grazed her shoulder. Palomides' eyes flashed menacingly, and then grew wide in shock as Lena's fist slammed into his cheek, leather-bound knuckles breaking skin."
That makes it more interesting, and the reader can get sucked into the battle, instead of only seeing it happening from an outside point of view.
Only use the actual names of the moves if it's imporant. if you use "roundhouse kick" and "upper-cut" and "karate-chop" just because every paragraph, then we'll start rolling our eyes.
You're not using the scene to show off what you know about fighting, you're using it as a driving scene in your story.

Good luck,

Q
Wow thank you very much. This is the style I would use, but never knew if it was the right one, because it sounded a little weird to me.
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Old 05-16-2006, 02:13 PM   #6
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Dreamer, This is an excellent question. I'm glad you asked it because I have the same problem. These are some great answers.
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Old 05-16-2006, 02:17 PM   #7
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I think there are three models you could use.

First, there's Professor Tolkein's approach. Tolkein skimmed over the fighting (which is what the medieval literature he translated did as well) - he simply says "Gimli slew many orcs" or words to that effect. This hasn't harmed his popularity, and it has a lot to recommend it if you don't personally know much about fistfighting or swordfighting.

Then there's Robert E. Howard's approach. Howard likes to write about blood and guts and gore. There aren't so many individual swordstrokes or punches described, but he gets very enthusiastic about describing the results - and Howard wisely ensures that Conan sometimes gets injured too. If he didn't, we wouldn't feel tension.

Fritz Leiber likes to describe individual swordstrokes and parries. He's been much-imitated in this, but the copies are always absolutely dismal. The reason Leiber could do it and other people couldn't is because Leiber was a champion fencer and he really knew what he was talking about - I don't advise this approach unless you are, too.

I feel that an action scene is only interesting while it's building tension. The reader needs to believe that a character they care about could die, or be injured, or lose something important - so in good action writing, each sentence heightens the tension on an important character.

Golden rule: If the protagonist makes a fist, the antagonist has to draw a knife. If the protagonist draws a knife, the antagonist has to pull a sword.

Silver rules: Generally the passive voice is bad; in action writing it's absolutely poison. Chop out every single adverb and 99% of the adjectives. The shorter each sentence, the better. Avoid the verb "to be" - every time you've said "was" or "were", rewrite the sentence: "The room was dark" -> "Darkness cloaked the room". "He was tall" -> "He loomed tall."

Hope this helps
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Old 05-16-2006, 09:06 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Non Serviam
I think there are three models you could use.

First, there's Professor Tolkein's approach. Tolkein skimmed over the fighting (which is what the medieval literature he translated did as well) - he simply says "Gimli slew many orcs" or words to that effect. This hasn't harmed his popularity, and it has a lot to recommend it if you don't personally know much about fistfighting or swordfighting.

Then there's Robert E. Howard's approach. Howard likes to write about blood and guts and gore. There aren't so many individual swordstrokes or punches described, but he gets very enthusiastic about describing the results - and Howard wisely ensures that Conan sometimes gets injured too. If he didn't, we wouldn't feel tension.

Fritz Leiber likes to describe individual swordstrokes and parries. He's been much-imitated in this, but the copies are always absolutely dismal. The reason Leiber could do it and other people couldn't is because Leiber was a champion fencer and he really knew what he was talking about - I don't advise this approach unless you are, too.

I feel that an action scene is only interesting while it's building tension. The reader needs to believe that a character they care about could die, or be injured, or lose something important - so in good action writing, each sentence heightens the tension on an important character.

Golden rule: If the protagonist makes a fist, the antagonist has to draw a knife. If the protagonist draws a knife, the antagonist has to pull a sword.

Silver rules: Generally the passive voice is bad; in action writing it's absolutely poison. Chop out every single adverb and 99% of the adjectives. The shorter each sentence, the better. Avoid the verb "to be" - every time you've said "was" or "were", rewrite the sentence: "The room was dark" -> "Darkness cloaked the room". "He was tall" -> "He loomed tall."

Hope this helps
Very good tips, all around. Can I print it off and tape it to my desk?
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Old 05-17-2006, 03:04 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Quillqueen
Very good tips, all around. Can I print it off and tape it to my desk?
No, I'm afraid that if you want to immortalize my inane advice, I'm gonna need to ask you to tattoo it on your stomach.
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Old 05-17-2006, 04:11 PM   #10
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The key to keeping the reader gripped to every page is to show, not tell.

Show us the battle, rather then telling us the battle is there, as the examples show. They descroibe exactly what is happening...that is the key.

Okay, so that may have been pointless, but just wanted to give my thougths on it.

Remember: Show, don't tell..show, don't tell...show.
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Old 05-17-2006, 08:46 PM   #11
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Remember: Show, don't tell..show, don't tell...show.[/quote]


A very good mantra for writers. I like to thread that throughout critiques.

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As for immortalizing advice by tattooing it on my stomache, is there any copyright information that I need to know before I go to the Parlour?
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Old 05-18-2006, 06:00 AM   #12
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Thanks, it's been my main rules for writing for awhile now...not sure how it popped into my head, but then again...who knows how a writer's mind works in the first place
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