Bobbybird

Hello, all. I just joined this forum and am planning to stay awhile - anyhow, here is my issue:

I am trying to figure out when to use a more advanced word as opposed to a more basic one. For instance, I was just writing a sentence in a new short story that began with: "Despite my introverted tendencies," At that point I stopped and erased "tendencies," replacing it with "proclivities". I'll do that sometimes - replacing a basic word with a more advanced one - because I am usually overly careful to use simple, clear language, and occasionally I like to indulge myself a fancier word.

I want my readers to be able to easily navigate my text. However, some of my favorite authors (Nabokov, for instance) rarely have paragraphs that don't contain higher-level words, and I absolutely love reading them.

What do others do when tempted to step up their vocabulary?

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journyman161

I look for the appropriate word, which depends on your audience, the story itself, the type of story, the character(s) and the plotline.

I'd give a Mage a different vocab to a farmer. The word choice should be consistent; if your narrator is Tom Sawyer, he speaks & thinks in far simpler terms than if it's Einstein telling the tale.

I'm a little concerned about your use of better to describe a more complex word. The only real way I would define one word as better than another is by whether it fits better and does a better job of creating the feeling you want in your story. It's all about the effect on the readers.

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TimK

This is a really fascinating subject. Here are some rules of thumb I've used:

• Remember the audience. For example, you wouldn't use 25-cent words in a children's book, but you would probably overuse them in an academic paper. Most audiences can appreciate thick words, if you use them judiciously, but want most of the text to flow right off the page and into their imaginations. So...
• Keep things simple unless there's a reason to make them more complicated. The mark of a great piece of writing is not that it uses lots of dense verbiage; but that it is so succinct and easy to understand, it packs such a big punch in a simple message.
• Remember the characters. A character who uses haughty language will come off differently than a character who uses more common language. Compare Frasier and his dad.
• Don't mix the ridiculous with the sublime. If you suddenly switch from one style to another, your readers will notice, and giggle. If you're going to use flowery prose, make sure it doesn't contrast with the prose next to it. Make sure transitions between styles are smooth, anticipated.

I seem to recall that Patricia O'Connor had much good advice in her very readable book Words Fail Me: What Everyone Who Writes Should Know about Writing.

-TimK

Destany

I know people who are insulted by overly large or complicated words, and it puts them off of reading. I feel a writer can get away with a less commonly spoke word, if it is used in a context where it is understandable, or it's use does not affect the idea your trying to convey.
Too many times, readers feel the writer is trying to show off their very large superior vocabulary, thus making the writer seem pretentious. Very offputting. You don't want to make your readers feel stupid.
And if the word is hitting on a main point in your story, where the reader won't understand what it is your trying to say unless they know the meaning- or have to look it up, it ruins the flow and your point is lost altogether.
Using big words can be useful, if- as said before, it is in context with the story and the character, and if you don't over use it.
One of my favorite authors of all time has a rather nasty habit of using "odd" words over and over again. This would be fine (even though the word is more fitting for the definition) if she used it once, or in one character only. But her overuse of the word is quite annoying and interrupts the flow. Something I am willing to overlook only because she writes pretty tales.

Hodge

You use whatever fits best. Period.


Have a pseudo-intellectual character? Make the presumptuous and condescending character use abstruse, superannuated, and interminable words.

Have a simple southerner? Then ba gawlee, 'e's a simpl' 'un fo shure!

Trying to describe something as vividly as possible? Use short words, colorful adjectives, and maybe a little personification for effective imagery. Think poetic.

A normal person? Why, he speaks just like this!




So unless it fits with what you're trying to do, long words are a no-no. A general rule of thumb is that if a short word works just as well as a long one, use the short one. If you needlessly use long and complex words, then you come off like the pseudo-intellectual above. People don't like it, and if they have to buy a dictionary in addition to your book, they probably just won't bother.

Use long words in academic papers. Often, you repeat yourself many times. You're actually supposed to repeat your point in every supporting paragraph, and college papers tend to have double digits for page numbers. So you need a lot of synonyms to not sound redundant—and that's what all those big words are for.

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Nickie

I can totally agree with what the people above said.

Match the vocabulary to the characters, and keep in mind for what audience you are writing.

My own IQ is high enough, but still I don't like to read a book with compicated words that keep me thinking I'm stupid. I read for fun, so I'd like to understand what I see.


Nickie

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mswietek

Although a country bumpkin backwoods redneck who speaks in impeccible and complicated language could make for an interesting character. Of course, as a writer you would need to justify why.

Michael

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clearbluesky

I second Destany all the way. Don't haul out a thesauraus and dictionary every time you need to describe something. If it word pops into your head, use it. You have to judge when it won't build a dam across the flow of the book.

And also, as destany said, don't reuse large words. DON"T. I currently reading a huge thousand page book which rocks. But the four times in all one thousand pages the author used the word lackadaisicalness made my stop and think, I've seem that before... Don't do it, I'm begging you. The same holds for expressions and similes. If you come up with a great comparison, use it once and discard it, don't try to milk more out of it than you can.

(One more thing, replacing a basic word with a more advanded doesn't always make it any clearer or more precise. Often times your just throwing in adverbs and adjectives that drag the readers focus of what you intended them to focus on)

TimK

Yes. And whatever you do, please remember to avoid the augmentation of lackadaisicalness portrayed by the formulation of this intercourse.

-TimK

Oracle

When using dialogue, or strong POV, stick to the intelligence of the character.

But when you're narrating, just write whatever comes naturally. If you purposely try to use words that are beyond your natural vocabulary, then it will just sound bad and out-of-place.

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Vincent Gray

Haha, suckers, I don't really have this problem because my vocabulary isn't all that big. But I'm working on it.

I think using a bigger word is fine in many cases, especially when you use it to replace a bunch of small words. For example, your can replace "due to the facotr of" with "because of". You could also just replace it with "due to", but though they are smaller words they feel to me to be harder and stuffier. Most people just say because, even though they know what "due to" means.

It's the same with, say "understand" and "comprehend", when they have the same meaning. Pretty much anyone will understand both but "understand' is more common. And I don't think it'd be believable dialogue for someone to say, even if they have a large vocabulary, "You just don't comprehend me." Even if your characters are smart they don't replace their entire vocabulary with "smarter" words unless they want to show off or whatever.

silverwriter

I read somewhere most books have about a 6th grade reading equivalent if they are for the general population. Most of the word processors have a readability scale you can use. I usually keep mine between 6 and 8 when I can.

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Ilan Bouchard

How do you do this? I used to know, but I forgot.

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TimK

Really. Read Words Fail Me: What Everyone Who Writes Should Know about Writing. (Or another similar book. There are several good ones.) That'll tell you how to do it.

-TimK

suzakugaiden

Using a "more advanced" word for the sake of using it is almost always the wrong reason.