Writing a good action scene... - Writers Forum

DawnMorningStar · 08-10-2004, 11:35 AM

I am really bad at writing effective action scenes, particularly battle sequences. Sometimes, despite my vivid imagination, I can't think of what each of the characters should do next, what punch they should throw, etc, etc. This leads me to eventually get bored with the scene, and sometimes I tend to rush through it a bit too quickly.

The problem with this is that I have several action/battle scenes in the book I'm writing. It's inevitable really, seeing as my main character fights vampires for a living.

So...what I'm wondering is, how do each of you approach writing fight scenes? What techniques are effective for you? How do you motivate yourself to keep at it until the scene is fully visualized and written down? Or...are there any good articles out there in regards to breaking down the elements of a battle scene?

Thanks!

daniela · 08-10-2004, 11:47 AM

Have you ever tried using movies for inspiration? I like to take a movie with a well-choreographed fight scene, and then slow it down so I can see each move that the fighters make. It helps me fully visualize the fight scene for my story. I do not copy the scene from the movie, but it is very useful to see how the fight scene breaks down into the different "moves" (for lack of a better word) and which ones are the most important.

I hope this makes some sense. If it does not, I will try to clarify my method later.

--DM--

DawnMorningStar · 08-10-2004, 11:58 AM

That's a very cool idea, daniela, and one I haven't tried yet. I will definitely give this suggestion a try. I can see where that would really help to polish off a fight scene. Thanks for the advice!

daniela · 08-10-2004, 02:29 PM

You are welcome. Here are a few webpages that you might find useful.

http://www.maisonbellchan.net/fanfic/fightscenes.html

http://marilynnbyerly.com/marilynnbyerly/page9k.html

http://parrot.moments-lost.co.uk/essays/action.htm

http://hollylisle.com/fm/Workshops/pacing-workshop.html

--DM--

Gladiator_008 · 08-10-2004, 03:06 PM

What I always do is close my eyes and just type. I seemingly just type what I see happen and then fill in the little details afterwards. It's best to just write what YOU want to see, like how the punch or kick should be, and then make a list of what kind of things you want in the battle and then just map it out. That's how I did it, and over time I came accustomed to how battle scenes worked and it's easier than ever now.

MisterRaziel · 08-10-2004, 04:58 PM

Minimalism is key. If you do a big play-by-play recitation of a fight, it will get boring.

Try focusing on the sensations rather than the actions. For instance, it's not how you hit the other guy, it's how it feels.

"Eh, man, gimme your wallet!"
The voice was nasal, probably coming from some damn teenager with a blade thinking he was hot shit. I was tempted to reach into my pocket for my snub-nosed .38, but thought better of it. I'd been in a bad mood all day, and I had a pretty nasty headache. This punk had picked the wrong guy on the wrong day.

I clenched my fist, relishing in the slow, grinding feel as my knuckles found their positions, well learned after long years of practise.

"You want it, kid? Come get it."

With a feral roar, he lunged at me too hard and too fast. I couldn't help but smirk at this rookie. His game was intimidation and I knew he didn't have the stones to back up the facade.

I sidestepped, the soles of my Rockports grating against the wet sidewalk. The punk stumbled and I slammed my fist into the back of his head. He went down head over heels, muttering curses. My hand ached, and I knew it was a solid hit. I only hoped he'd have the good sense to stay down.

No such luck. He dragged himself to his feet, collected his blade, and lunged again, more cautiously this time.

A vicious stab. I deflected it with my forearm, feeling the bite as the blade dug in. I winced and slammed my raised fist into his jaw. There was a wet snap as the jaw dislocated. Tears were streaming down the kid's face. He'd seen his mistake, but I wasn't about to let him off easy. The hand came down again and again, splattering cartilege and crushing bone. Once I felt the kid had had enough, I brought my other hand up into his stomach. His breath whooshed out in a Bacardi-reeking gust and he collapsed to the pavement. He'd wake up in a few hours wishing he'd never been born.

As I walked away, I noticed the kid had left a little souvenir in my stomach.

"Oh hell..." I muttered, and changed direction to stagger to the hospital.

Even that one ran a little long. It's all well and good to have hour long fight scenes in movies or anime shows, but if a person has to read it, it can get tiresome quickly.

Gladiator_008 · 08-10-2004, 05:03 PM

Here's a little bump on the road: what if it's a massive full-scale epic war? Should it be short and to the point, or should it tell, not in A LOT of detail but still enough, what it happening? I never really know what to do in this case, and need some help before I even try to sell any of my work.

Eiji Tunsinagi · 08-10-2004, 05:28 PM

When you have the epic scene, like in LOTR or something, trying to depict it with whats REALLY occuring can be a challenge. Try going for describing the feeling and presence of the battle.

DawnMorningStar · 08-10-2004, 05:33 PM

Thank you all very much for all of your advice! It's very helpful.

Daniela - thank you for the links. I will check them out tonight. Gladiator_008, I appreciate the suggestions about typing up the basics of what I want and then filling in later. That's usually what I do when I write a story anyway. I suppose I just need to take more time to really think over the fight scene. I guess my biggest problem is that I have a hard time knowing WHAT I want to happen in a fight scene. If I knew that, it would make it all so much easier (and it's funny, I'm in karate and everything...). What makes it even harder is that since I've never fought off vampires personally, I don't have any experience with which to base this off of.

MisterRaziel - thanks for the little writeup scene. That really did help put things into perspective. My main problem with this particular chapter I'm working on is that I can't make the scene too short this time because some very pivotal, important things happen, so mixed in with the battle is major plot. It just makes everything so much more complicated.

I definitely don't want things to get boring though, so I will keep your suggestions in mind while writing the action parts of this section.

Thanks again, everyone, and if anyone else has something to add, please feel free!

DawnMorningStar · 08-10-2004, 05:34 PM

Thanks Eiji Tunsinagi.

I'll keep that in mind too.

safari invasion · 08-11-2004, 10:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gladiator_008

Here's a little bump on the road: what if it's a massive full-scale epic war? Should it be short and to the point, or should it tell, not in A LOT of detail but still enough, what it happening? I never really know what to do in this case, and need some help before I even try to sell any of my work.

I like to start with an overview of the conflict, then delve into each individual conflict. Why each particular character is doing and how they have been motivated to do so. If you continuously talk about the battle as a whole ("these troops moved here then these guys moved over here") it won't sound very personal. The trick is writing from the perspective of the people in it, not from the perspective of someone watching it.

Talia_Brie · 08-11-2004, 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by safari invasion

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gladiator_008

Here's a little bump on the road: what if it's a massive full-scale epic war? Should it be short and to the point, or should it tell, not in A LOT of detail but still enough, what it happening? I never really know what to do in this case, and need some help before I even try to sell any of my work.

I like to start with an overview of the conflict, then delve into each individual conflict. Why each particular character is doing and how they have been motivated to do so. If you continuously talk about the battle as a whole ("these troops moved here then these guys moved over here") it won't sound very personal. The trick is writing from the perspective of the people in it, not from the perspective of someone watching it.

Or mixing up those perspectives, which is what I think you were getting at. Think of a roving camera that scrolls over the battlefield before focusing in one one conflict, then another, then another . . .

MisterRaziel · 08-12-2004, 03:08 AM

This is one part where movies get it right:

They start with a far-off shot of the armies squaring off, or already engaged, and then they zoom right in to one or two soldiers fighting for their lives.

You might even consider, if your book is third person, changing the focal point for a chapter. So, for instance, you'd change the focus to a grunt on the front lines, and how he's feeling - is he hungry? Is he worried about his wife and kids? Is he scared to die?

Then the armies charge and you describe what this grunt sees and feels, taking that as a broad indicator of how every other grunt on the battlefield is feeling.

Magnatolia · 08-16-2004, 06:06 AM

Try looking up the scripts of certain TV shows or movies that relate to the theme of your book. For vampires, try 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' or 'Angel'.

A good-sounding site is www.simplyscripts.com - they offer TV shows, movies, anime movies, plus more.

Cheers
Jason

Magnatolia · 08-16-2004, 06:34 AM

Try looking up the scripts of certain TV shows or movies that relate to the theme of your book. For vampires, try 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer' or 'Angel'.

A good-sounding site is www.simplyscripts.com - they offer TV shows, movies, anime movies, plus more.

Cheers
Jason