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Funeral death in a wedding cake.
(I'm 13, gimme a break.)
The wedding bells chimed. The bride slowly ''floated'' across the aisle and approached the man dressed in a smooth, black tuxedo.
"Hello, children. We are gathered he today to witness the marriage of Paulie Knuckes Pirrano and Veronicajameson Paulinason." the Vicar began.
"I'd like to point out that this is an illegal wedding, mainly because these are children and both transvestites, if that is the politically correct word." he continued, slightly coughing into his moist hand.
"Do you, Paulie Knuckles Jameson John Pirrano take this child, Veronicejameson Paulinason, to be your lawful wedded wife?" he mumbled,
"Of course I do, you prick." the man shouted across to him.
"Don't speak to me like that, you idiotic moron! I'm a man of the parish! I'm the equivalent to.. let's say, 2PAC - but the religious version!"
"2PAC's dead mudda'fucker'. And so are you now!" Knuckles screamed, sliding his hand into his smooth and gentle tuxedo and feeling around for his
Colt. 45,
It wasn't there. It wasn't fucking there.
Veronicajameson slid out the beretta and aimed the gun to Knuckles' head,
"Haha! I'm a fucking Federal Government Agent Of The bureau of Federal Justice Agent!" she cried,
"But, BUT VERONICA! I thought you were a tranny?" he cried, back to her.
"It was the only way I could explain the hairy legs.. the testacles and the man boobs. I'M ACTUALLY.. A MAN!" she revealed her penis, for proof.
She pushed the chamber into the beretta and a bullet soared through the air.
Suddenly, the scene hit slow motion and Knuckles leaned back and the bullet flew over him.
"Oh for fuck sake. That's just bloody cheating. You can't do that. This isn't the matrix you prick!" Veronicajameson shouted.
Then, as the scene reversed and the bullet flew back into the gun.. it cut back into current time and this time the bullet slammed into his eyeball.
He dropped down to the floor, leaving a loud thud as if Fern Britton had gone diving.
The crowd screamed, as if Fern Britton had gone skinny dipping.
The vicar yelled, "OH GOD", and revealed his true identity.. ELTON JOHN?
TO BE CONTINUED...
Okay, I'm thinking about using this as a movie entry for Youtube's new competition!
Comments.
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