S. Nine

She is relentlessly haunted by the ghost of a monster that no one knows, that no one understands. Others, others who have been lucky enough to never feel the anguish of the monster’s touch, couldn’t possibly comprehend what she faces each and every day. They see only what can be seen with the visible eye…a monster that came and left. But the awful truth is that the monster never really stopped harming her. Its body did, a long time ago, but it left a ghost in it’s path…a dark, terrifying ghost that is not the monster. But it looks like the monster…it touches like the monster…it hurts like the monster. It is not real- her logical, adult mind can see that quite clearly. The monster that haunted her childhood has not come near her since the days of jump ropes and pigtails. But its ghost follows her every movement. It haunts her mind, fuels the pain of memory by making her feel like it is not a memory at all, like the monster has returned in all its despicable glory. It still has the power, it still fuels its deep, twisted rage by stealing her body, her heart, her soul.

She replays the insensitive words of ignorant people over and over again in her mind…she hears, “You should have gotten over this already”… “You’re making a mountain out of a molehill”… “You can’t think about this all the time.” How silly it all sounds. Can’t these thoughtless, callous people see that if it could only be that simple, she would have gotten over this a long time ago? But they don’t know the ghost…it is the ghost who makes it so the horrifying memories are not memories at all, but a constant reality, a life in the present in which she is forced to constantly relive the past. It is her shadow, watching her every move, smiling its haunting smile, waiting for just the right moment to bring the monster right back into the limelight. The ghost is cruel and calculating…it senses the tiniest sliver of contentment within her and pounces, just like its creator, into every part of her being. It violates her mind and her body, day after day, moment after dark, merciless moment, putting every part of her through more physical and emotional turmoil than it can possible tolerate.

Perhaps the worst of the ghost’s twisted deeds is its constant reinforcement of everything the monster taught her, all the misconceptions, all the self-defeating lies. She is a tainted piece of meat- damaged and then carelessly discarded. She is chained down to a predetermined life of harming others and being harmed herself. The monster put inside of her a ticking time bomb that, at any second, will explode and turn her into the inhuman predator she fears most. The monster destroyed all the good within her…she is nothing now, he stole her light and left her dark, empty, useless. She fights these thoughts, the awful thoughts that the ghost forces upon her… but there is no amount of fighting that will make him disappear, that will make his lies disappear.

She lies awake in the dead of night, in the room covered in steel and locks, but it is to no avail. Her precautions may keep the monster away, but she knows that there is not a lock, weapon, or rabid dog in the world that can chase away the ghost of a monster.

Starby

I really like the style, it reads well. I feel it could be expanded a bit more though. Is it meant as an entire short story? Perhaps you could go into the narrator's background and provide some info - it's left me wanting to know more. Maybe that's just me, especially as it's something I can relate to. What will happen when the ghost overcomes her? What else is she feeling apart from fear? What is going on in her life? Maybe some things to think about.

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S. Nine

Thanks . I'm not sure whether I meant it as a complete short story, I could definitely write more, I'm just not sure exactly what it is that I want to say. I was just having really bad flashbacks one day and I was thinking about how it felt like the man who hurt me was back, but it was like a ghost of him because it obviously wasn't real.

booker41

Maybe a slight over-use of the word monster? Ten times, in the first paragraph.

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nacreous

excellent idea for a story. good writing overall, but the beginnings of each paragraph are much better written than the middle and the conclusion of each paragraph. The beginnings of your paragraphs are very well-crafted, and yet the dynamic flow seems interrupted near the middles. Keep up that initial flow, eh? And you keep going back and forth between her and the monster, even within a single paragraph. I'd say dedicate a single para to a single character. Keep working on this, and it'll turn out fine. good luck with it.