penguinsfly03

It was too bad the Philistine was too far in the back for anybody to hear what he had to say. He was with an unimpressive group so far down the ranks that you needed to a shovel to dig them up. They were the ones that either went in first to die pointlessly or the ones who just plain never went in because the rest of the army "forgot" about them at home. He tried to see as much as he could, but all he had heard was that Goliath had been slain by David. He noticed that even though the army itself was quite untouched everybody was running around like they were all chopped in half. He decided this would be a good time to propose his idea.

"Hey uh, guys! I think we should just kill him anyways!"

No one heard a word he said up front. He yelled it at the top of his lungs and the only person who heard it was half drunk and for some reason naked guy rolling in the dirt. It was an odd part of the army. He figured he’d give it another shot.

"Guys! Just kill him for heavens sakes kill him! He’s a kid with some rocks! We got spears, and swords!"

No one heard him. Maybe the naked guy now chasing a pig heard him, but he was quite occupied. The man wondered for a moment on where that pig came from, and why did the naked chase it. Well he decided that maybe an old fashioned game of telephone would get his point across. So he leaned up and whispered in a soldiers ear.

"Kill the boy with the rocks. Pass it up."

It spread like wildfire and in instants the men at the front had the message, but when the new version was spoken it differed slightly from the original. It made no sense to begin with, and the man wondered just what exactly these soldiers were drinking.

"Fill the boys socks."

"This army sucks."

The man stayed quiet as they left and once home he sat in a chair and looked at his wife for hours. Just sat there and once the moment felt right he stood up. He marched all the way down to the camps where most soldiers were staying and while everyone was looking he yelled.

"You idiots! It was one kid with a sack of rocks! Why didn’t you just stab him!"

"Now that you bring it up it does make a lot more sense then letting them win."

Next time they went to battle the man in the back who chased the pigs had a partner. Both of them spent the entire battle chasing around a pig naked until they were killed about five minutes after the battle started.