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| Short Stories Short Stories, usually between 500 and 2000 words. |
10-21-2006, 09:33 PM
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#1
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Addict
Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 111
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A welcome death (flash 187 words)
Today is my last day to live. I know, because I’m going to end it. Some of us are destined to live a life of adventure, happiness, and exploration. But others, like me, were destined to live a life of misery and drudgery. I spend each day eating, sleeping, and crapping, Then, I wake up the next day to do the same thing once more. There is some variation. For instance, some days I crap many times during the day, and others not.
I am looking out over the water’s edge right now, longing for death’s sweet and eternal embrace. I am going to jump. Perhaps the fall will kill me, or maybe I will die a slow gasping death. Either way, it will be welcome. No one will miss me. I jump.
“Mister Goldie! You silly fish. You have jumped out of your bowl again.” The pretty, young girl picked up the struggling fish and placed him back lovingly into his bowl. “I’m going to have to keep your lid on.” She fastened the lid onto the fishbowl, determined to keep it on from now on.
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10-21-2006, 09:35 PM
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#2
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: in the prison of my own mind
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,645
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That ending was hysterical! My praise to you.
Sanc
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10-21-2006, 10:27 PM
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#3
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Prolific Writer
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Gender: Male
Posts: 444
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Hahaha,
Oh, I was getting all ready to pounce and say "you crap several times a day?", but that ending is hilarious and fits wonderfully. I still feel a strangely sad tinge for the fish though. Now he doesn't even have a choice but to go on crapping...
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--This space intentionally left blank--
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10-22-2006, 12:51 AM
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#4
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 4,792
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Ha, that was clever and funny.
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10-22-2006, 03:40 AM
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#5
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Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 8
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This was very cleverly writen.. I lvoe it hehe well done with it!
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10-22-2006, 06:12 AM
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#6
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 2,139
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That was funny, lol. Fishes turds are horrible, by the way. They get to about 30cm long, and since the fish swims in a circle, it stares at its own turd in front of it... A sad life... I don't blame the little guy
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It's only natural to want something profound in your sig.
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10-23-2006, 11:02 AM
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#7
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Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 15
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that was a good read. funny and clever. i am glad this has been the first story i have read here.
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10-23-2006, 06:14 PM
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#8
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Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Brooklyn, NY
Gender: Male
Posts: 1
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Ha! A clever, slightly dark twist in such a short story. Nice work. This was also the first story I've read on these forums.  |
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10-23-2006, 06:38 PM
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#9
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Mentor
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Fergus, Ontario CA
Posts: 2,536
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Geez, I thought I was reading another WF suicide note. So the ending was both funny and kind of a relief.
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10-23-2006, 07:38 PM
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#10
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Writing Machine
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Is that an existential question?
Posts: 1,863
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That was really cute in a sick, twisted sort of way--so authentic sounding you even caught Chris in the beginning there. Always wondered what when though a fish's mind in a bowl--made sooo much sense.
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Old enough to know better, young enough to think I can still get away with it.
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10-24-2006, 08:25 PM
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#11
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Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Canada
Gender: Female
Posts: 17
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That was extremly funny and yet i feel a bit sad for the poor fish. Everything fit together wonderfully and the ending definatly was not expected.
Good job! Keep it up! 
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*Tish*
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