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| Short Stories Short Stories, usually between 500 and 2000 words. |
07-23-2006, 01:59 PM
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#1
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Banned
Join Date: Jun 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 55
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The Amazing Superheros of Today
Spiderman: *playing a game on his Xbox*
Batman: Hey SpiderWANG what game is that?
Spiderman: Parasite Evolution...
Batman: Gay. Halo is way better.
Spiderman: Uhm..Okay.
Batman: ...
Spiderman: *playing his game*
Batman: *whistling*
Spiderman: ?
Batman: Uh....
Spiderman: *playing*
Batman: uhh....
Spiderman: ...?
Batman: Can I play?
Spiderman: *Sigh* Sure..if you want. What race do you want to be? Human, Orcs, or Elves?
Batman: Orcs.
Spiderman: Okay....there you go.
Batman: Great. Now get the fuck off and let me play. *pulls spiderman off of the chair and sits on it*
Spiderman: ...
(Two Hours Later)
Batman: Is my parasite going to be stuck like this forever? It's not changing anymore...
Spiderman: Well..Yeah. You chose the orc race, and you succesfully got him up to level 99. He's definately going to stay.......that way.
Batman: FUCK!!!! *slams controller on the ground* IM TIRED OF SHOOTING LASERS OUT OF MY FUCKING BUTTHOLE. THIS CHARACTER SUCKS.
Spiderman: You know...he could probably beat mine.
Batman: Halo was way better. *slaps spiderman on the head, pulls out a Single Action Army from his utility belt and shoots both the TV screen and the Xbox*
Spiderman: HEY! .....fucker.
Batman: that games BLOWS. *leaves*
Spiderman: ....Ugh.
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07-23-2006, 02:07 PM
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#2
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Banned
Join Date: Jun 2006
Gender: Male
Posts: 55
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(This is an old one)
(One awkward evening on May 17, 2005 at 3:45 PM)
Batman : Chad..get me my DANG coffee, you need to stop wasting your ******* time, poking your ***.
Spiderman : *walks towards Batman and gives him his coffee* FOR THE LAST ******* TIME BRUCE, IT'S NOT CHAD, ITS PETER PARKER, ITS ******* PETER PARKER.
Batman : *grabs coffee* shut the hell up and bring me my creams...
Spiderman : ...*****..*goes and gets Batman's creams*
Superman : you know Batman, you really should stop calling Spiderman chad.
Batman : Oh so it's Spiderman now? First it's chad,
Spiderman : I never said it was Chad...ass *pours some cream onto Batman's coffee*
Batman : AHEM, then it's Peter Parker, and NOW it's Spiderman. See, the poor kid cant decide on a name, so it's only logical that I give one TO him. ......Chad, I need a spoon for this you know.
Spiderman : get it yourself...
Batman : excuse me?
Spiderman : ..I hate you *goes and gets him a spoon*
Superman : ..whatever, Bruce.
Batman : I love it when people kiss my ass so I don't kick theirs. : D
Spiderman : *puts the spoon in the coffee cup* ..there
Batman : oh, so that spoon is just going to stir ITSELF?
Spiderman : ...*stirs it for him for about 2 minutes*
Superman : gee...im bored as hell.
Batman : ...me too ... <.<; >.>; *throws the coffee cup at Spiderman*
Spiderman : AHH!!! WTF ARE YOU DOING BRUCE, THIS **** BURNS!
Batman : I TOLD YOU TO STOP WASTING TIME YOU MORON, LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO MY COFFEE..GO, GET ME, ANOTHER ONE!
Spiderman : ....Why don't I get the respect I deserve..? *shrugs*
Batman : *slaps Spiderman* HURRY UP, YOU'RE WASTING ******* TIME. SESAME STREET IS ABOUT TO START YOU ******* IDIOT!
Spiderman : *flips him off and goes and makes him another coffee*
*Suddenly, a commercial of Viagra staring Ronald Mcdonald ends and Big Bird appears on the screen.*
Batman : big BIRD!
Superman and Spiderman : ...?
Big Bird : hey kids! are you READY for some ABC's?
Batman : YES!
Big Bird : Are you REALLY up for the CHALLENGE?
Batman : OF COURSE, I PRACTICED LAST NIGHT, JUST FOR YOU!
Big Bird : OKAAY!
Big Bird and Batman : ONE! TWO! THREE! ABCDEFG!
Batman : *suddenly gets up off the couch and starts swinging his bat shaped grapple hook around in circles* H! I!! J!!! K!!!
Big Bird : LMNOP!!!
Batman : *Begins to swing the grapple hook around rapidly, which eventually hits Spiderman's eye*
Spiderman : AHH! MY ******* EYE!! *drops coffee mug on his foot* AAHHRRGHGHAA!!!
Batman : *big bird finishes singing the ABC's* ...........................CHAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!
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07-23-2006, 02:09 PM
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#3
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 2,139
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hahaha.. I like it.. I really enjoyed it lol. You have a talent for mindless..nes (?)
Fantasy
__________________
It's only natural to want something profound in your sig.
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07-24-2006, 02:37 PM
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#4
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Profound Writer
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: San Antonio, TX
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,164
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WTF? ...
...
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This is great. Do you watch x-play? This so reminds me of The Marios. It's hilarious. Great work. 
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07-24-2006, 09:40 PM
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#5
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Scribe
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Cali, You-Ess-Ey
Gender: Female
Posts: 85
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I know you! You're the scriptwriter for Aqua Teen Hunger Force! Oh man, I really like that episode where MC Pee Pants... Just kidding.
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07-27-2006, 08:23 AM
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#6
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Les Etats-Unis
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,568
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I don't care if it isn't a short story, I love it. You are so damn funny...But why censor the second and not the first? Seems odd. You are very funny. I want to join the fan club!
Alice
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07-27-2006, 02:05 PM
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#7
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Montana
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,047
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I guess there kinda funny... in a stupid kind of way. Why use the superheros? I think it would be funnier if you just used some kids names...
Ty
__________________
Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly - Voltaire
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07-27-2006, 02:08 PM
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#8
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Ink Slinger
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 2,139
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No!!! Don't change the superheroes, it is the main source of the comedy. Sorry Ty, just my opinion  but you shouldn't change it! The trivial kids behind the super heroe is much funnier than random nobodies
__________________
It's only natural to want something profound in your sig.
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07-28-2006, 07:17 AM
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#9
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Scribe
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: England
Posts: 64
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Its not my...cup of coffee...
__________________
.:Matt:.
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And suddenly, Out of nowhere, Nothing happened.
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