Little red riding hood, from a different view point - Writers Forum

Crazy_dude6662 · 12-21-2005, 05:28 PM

Little red riding hood

with a twist

I was walking along minding my own business when a bright red flash caught my attention, I mean she wasn’t hard to miss with everything around her green or brown.
I was about to jump out and scare her and take her food but a better idea struck me.
So I ran a little ahead and ‘accidentally’ bumped into her. I started chatting pleasantly, during the conversation she told me she was going to her grandmothers house to deliver some food, so I challenged her to a race to see who got there first.
I ran as fast as I could, being careful not to run into any woodsmen. Soon I arrived at the grandmothers house, I knocked on the door, when she asked “who’s there?” I put on my best falsetto voice and replied “it’s me grandma! Little Red Riding Hood” I laughed to myself as the bolts on the door slid out of place, she opened the door and I pounced like…well like a wolf. Before she could say “oh” she was in my gullet. Her clothes were lying there and I decided what the hell? After all its Halloween, that’s one thing that annoys me, its NEVER mentioned its Halloween so I go down in history looking like a gay cross-dressing wolf! My friends still wont let it go! Anyway as I was saying there was a knock on the door, I got the fright of my life, I didn’t want to be seen so I dove under the duvet. And in barges the little girl, and she starts on me saying things like “Jesus your teeth are so wonky and all the place, you should sue your dentist” and “I hope I didn’t inherit those ginormus ears!” well I was so angry I jumped on her, I only ment to scare her…but then she screamed so I covered her mouth with my paw but she wouldn’t shut up so I shoved her into my mouth, and unfortunately the automatic swallow reflex kicked in, it wasn’t my fault! So really I wanted people to know the truth, that she was a skank and im completely innocent.

galt · 12-22-2005, 01:44 PM

'Grandmothers' should be 'Grandmother's', with an apostrophe.
Also, the setence should be '...so I challenged her to a race to see who could get there first.'
The sentences should read like this: "Soon I arrived at the grandmother's house. I knocked on the door, and when she asked, "Who's there?" I put on my best falsetto voice and replied, "It's me, Grandma! Little Red Riding Hood." So fix those sentences.
Also, how would the wolf be compeletely innocent? Even he didn't intend to eat the girl, he still plotted to eat the grandmother all along.

Crazy_dude6662 · 12-22-2005, 02:02 PM

it never said he was planning it. meh, i had to have them both eaten

gohn67 · 12-22-2005, 04:39 PM

Hey CD,
Lot of spelling and grammar mistakes, but I enjoyed the read, I found it funny.

I liked the voice that you used for the wolf. Conversational.

Liked the part when she said the wolves teeth were so wonky.

Liked the part about the cross dressing wolf.

Amusing story, I like this one better than the original. It's a lot better than the parodies I've seen on television.

Crazy_dude6662 · 12-22-2005, 04:48 PM

hehe thanks i had to do it for a writing thingy and i wanted opinions