Thread: Does it matter?

The first scene in a movie I wrote the rough draft for is only description, and no dialog. Does it really matter, It's actually supposed to be no talking because the first scene is dramatic.

Originally Posted by kingajcice

The first scene in a movie I wrote the rough draft for is only description, and no dialog. Does it really matter, It's actually supposed to be no talking because the first scene is dramatic.

Doesn't matter.

thank you

Less dialogue is often the better choice anyway... in my opinion. If you can tell a story clearly without dialogue and without the need for dialogue...why put it in that scene?! It'd be like making every moving out there with a car chase, just becuase we expect it in a movie.

True. Hitchcock said it another way: when the script is finished, then add dialogue.

I think I agree. I read in more than one place that if you have in excess of 4 or 5 lines of action/description, you need to trim it down. I think that's Bullshit. How about for instance a heist movie when they're inside the museum or the bank? I had an opening scene in my script where a guy spends about two minutes doing an international bank transaction in a room by himself. The action/description was two paragraphs. Not big-ass rambling ones, but two nonetheless. It was a major point of exposition in the movie and how the hell can you describe how someone is meticulous and business-like in 3 lines?..You don't say they are business-like and meticulous, YOU SHOW IT.

I later threw it out because my plot changed but I think I'm seeing that in Screen writing as in life, never say never.

I think allot of script writing primers usually tell novices to keep it to a few lines of action/description because it's easy for a noob to lapse into prose, like they're writing a novel. I catch myself doing it and have to stop myself.

Action can be broken up though. I try not to have more than three lines of action in a row and then I start a new paragraph. Space it out. Feed the white space... which looks attractive and easy to read. Look at your favorite action sequences in scripts. You'll see how you can do it without dialogue.

That's the ticket.
As you've noticed, I'm not a big one for the rules people spout about scripts, but I do try to keep action paragraphs under 5 lines. All it takes is a double space to break it up, and it reads much easier and gives less of the "grey sheet" look.

Obviously there are films with long, long passages without dialogs. And there are films with long dialog exchanges with no action, unless somebody inserts some "business" to break things up.

I'm just asking because my anal teacher says if it's four or more lines you have to break it up or he takes points off.

Part of screenwriting is writing in a way that is to be expected of the person issuing you the project. If he says no more than 4 lines of action together, then do as he says. It's not going to hurt your project and it will make him happy. He probably made that rule to keep people from writing epic paragraphs, and it isn't a bad habit to get into (even though it isn't the end all be all of screenwriting).

Originally Posted by Wallmaker

Action can be broken up though. I try not to have more than three lines of action in a row and then I start a new paragraph. Space it out. Feed the white space... which looks attractive and easy to read. Look at your favorite action sequences in scripts. You'll see how you can do it without dialogue.

Oh yes. I do break it up. The action lines are single spaced so you can't really have too many without a break. So when I move from one "phase" or part of the action to the next, I break it up into paragraphs.

It seems I like to do exposition with visual things rather than through dialog. So I seem to be leaning toward more action lines. My dialog tends to be rather sparse.

I'm learning here how I do things. I'm working on subtext in my dialog, which is hard at first. So right now I'm more into the visual aspects of it. Which is why I'm always trying to trim fat in my action lines. It's like I'm balancing between action and dialog, knowing that I need more and better dialog, but feel more comfortable with description.

Depends on the type of film. John Woo doesn't need much dialog. RomCom's need a lot.