Thread: Blame Canada... Blame CANADA!!!

Go ahead... come on... you know you want to. :p~ For anything, anything at all. Bonus points if you make it funny.


Why, you ask? Why, because they released NEVERWINTER NIGHTS, silly! And in a few years things will go something like this:

U.S.A.: Sorry, canada, but I'm going to have to annex you.
Canada: What? You can't do that! There are :insert trivially small number here: people here! We're our own country!

USA: Yes. But c'mon, they're frickin CANADIANS. Everybody knows they want to be AMERICANS. Just ask Dr. TRAN.
Canada: Dammit! We just did a boring and inconsequential survey that says... urm... we should stay canda.

USA: Do you have a flag?
CAnada: Urm...just the queen...

USA: No Flag no country. That's the rule. In any case, I'm backing up my right to conquer you with this gun, which I've loaned from the National Rifle Associaton.
Canada: But Why?!?

USA: Why? Because you're CANADA!

Ad infinitum. So go ahead. You know you want to. Blame Canada... BLAME CANADA!!!

(Yes, it's demeaning. Yes, it's retarded. But it's all in good jest, so don't let it bother you.)

Side note: All contributions must be in the form of a 250 word story.

Yeah, next we can do the exact same thing with Texas being Canada and Mexico the US. A little bit of history repeating.

"Mr President, the Canadian Ambassador is here to discuss terms."

"What? Can't you see I'm in the middle of a jigsaw puzzle? Can't this wait until the next President comes?"

"I'm sorry sir, it really is urgent," the aide said.

"Oh, alright, send him in. Wait. Gimme five minutes to change outta my sweats."

"Yes, sir."
------------


"Mr President, how good of you to see me on such short notice!" the tall lanky ambassador Oxfam said effusively.

"Yeah, yeah, what do you need now?" the leader of the free world asked testily.

"My government is ready to accede to your governments demands, proviso quod you take Quebec as well."

"The proviso whozits? You should know by now that I don't speak that Frenchy lingo."

"It's Latin, sir."

"I don't speak that either."

The ambassador let it go.

"Yes, well, we're willing to join with the USA only if the USA takes Quebec as well." he said slowly.

"Quebec is part of Canada?"

"Yes, barely, but yes."

"I don't know if we want Quebec, necessarily, though it might be a good place to send all those damned whiners from Louisiana..." the Decider said.

______________________________________

I blame Canada - for being the only sensible government on this continent.

Two words: Celine Dion.

"Heh heh heh, too much South Park, I thinky?"

I think, Cacafire, the prompt wasn't explict enough.
Put the "250 word story" up front more...boldly, otherwise it's just going to turn into a debate thread.

Thousands of years ago the ice age, that we are told engulfed much of the United States, started in Canada (hear that! it started up there in Canada). Moving slowly, year by year (so as to not draw too much attention) its mass increased as it crept innocently across eastern Canada and slipping silently into the eastern half of what is today the America…see what happens when your not paying attention!

Pushing mounds of the earths crust into ridges and mountains (and anything else that Canada didn’t want!) it gouged out lakes, streams and rivers. Unable to cope with the loss of habitat, animals were forced to move south, adapting or disappearing (actually they had wanted the ice age to happen later, bad timing, and move the French Canadian’s into Louisiana…but I get ahead of myself…that happen much later, their timing was just off.)

Why was this happening? Scientist will say that… “Variation in the Earth's orbit (tilt) through time causes changes in the amount and distribution of sunlight (and other solar radiation) reaching the Earth's surface. These changes are thought to affect the development of ice sheets”.

So, you ask, what has this got to do with “blaming Canada”? Well as the scientist said, it was variation or “TILT” and tilt is how you stand on things…and the Canadians stand was to push everything they didn’t want out…into the U.S…so there you go!!

What we are today is all Canada’s fault!

Now…if we could just create a reverse ice age and push (all that “we” don’t want) back up there!!!

Originally Posted by TsuTseQ

Two words: Celine Dion.

she scares me.


i have a theory she got plastic surgery, but she was hit in the face with a hot frying pan so her face melted.

Originally Posted by George.W.

"The proviso whozits? You should know by now that I don't speak that Frenchy lingo."

"It's Latin, sir."

"I don't speak that either."

What he actually said was, 'I don't speak South American.'

Canada is a big country, are you sure you know what you are doing? Take a tip from a Brit, pick on a small island like the Falklands or Malta. Something you can kick the shit out of if things go a bit wrong.

P.S. Don't choose Sicily.

Hey, hey, hey...I don't like this! I'm canadian, and no matter what popular opinion believes, we do NOT EAT BLUBBER TO STAY ALIVE.

What are ye, but a bunch of stereotypes, you people make me sick.

I blame Canada for making a genuise like me...

Sick people.

No, these stereo types are sick sick people, oh and trends are for those with self identity.

No, these stereo types are sick sick people, oh and trends are for those with self identity.

You're such a hypcrite! Notice everyone from Ireland has to hate something.