Thread: Workshop: stories based on ads

Writers workshop

I am also a member of a Dutch writing site. On that site they have numerous workshops that you can complete related to certain themes. Each time there are six excercises to complete that hopefully will help imporove your skill.

Anubis608 and myself decided that we would like to complete some of these workshops and critique on each other's work to help each other learn. The first one we are going to start with is called 'stories based on ads'. We would love to welcome anyone who would like to join. You can do so by completing this excersise and posting it. We will critique it just like we will each other's work. All we ask in return is that you will offer critique to our work. Anyone who just wants to critique the work posted is also welcome to do so.

After two weeks I will add the second excersise to this thread and so on. Should anyone want to join in at that point it will be fine as well.

In the next post you will find the first of the excercises related to this first workshop. The text of it has not been written by me but is a translated version of the orginal workshop.

For those of you who are now deciding to join in, welcome we are glad you are joining us We hope that you will enjoy the experience

Stories based on ads

Ads in the paper are not just funny but can be a good source of inspiration for stories.


Part 1: Cupid
‘Woman, 38, attractive, slim, sweet, spontaneous and sincere, likes reading, music and walking. Looks for a sincere and calm man to have fun and possibly more. Age from 30-55’.

They can be funny, the Saturday contact ads, with their desires caught in beautiful words and their obvious lies. Always walking, reading and music. Never gambling addict, neurosis or nose picking. There is another reason why these ads are interesting and that is as the basis for stories. This particular add maybe somewhat too tame but with some you can instantly imagine a character, a hidden desire, a conflict.

Exercise:
Go through the personal adds, close your eyes and randomly select three of them. Pick the one you like most of these three and describe the main character: who is he/she? What does he/she look like? What makes him/her tick? Also describe the environment, where does this person live? Where does this person work? Find a possible conflict: Is there something in his/her way? What does he/she desire and what is stopping him/her from getting it? Use this information to write a short story (maximum of 1000 words).

Part 1-
-Dull-
Looking for 2 outgoing and enthusiastic indivduals to work at Mall. New childeren's attraction. 2 Pt positions. Should be avail to work weekends.

Looking for 2 bubble gum snaping teens that have enough on their minds and are willing to work for just above minium wagde. Make sure your life isn't full with Boyfirends and phone calls, your weekends become ours.

Well, after 2 & 1/3 fails, I am just doing this using the example provided (lame). So, this is a first draft (crappy) of the assignment and I think I took it down the path of least resistance (dull) although it was a nice exercise in dialogue.
　
The ad again: ‘Woman, 38, attractive, slim, sweet, spontaneous and sincere, likes reading, music and walking. Looks for a sincere and calm man to have fun and possibly more. Age from 30-55’.
　

Untitled, 954 words
　

“Okay, already,” Gina says, reaching for the notebook only to get her hand slapped. “C’mon, it isn’t funny anymore.”
　
“Oh, we’re doing this,” Tandi says getting more comfortable in the retro club chair. Something about the black ‘pleather’ brings out the malice in her eyes. She brushes some dust from the keyboard and studies her work so far.
　
This place used to be trendy. Café, used books, magazines. Most of the people still here have grown out of touch with the place. About a decade ago, Tandi dubbed it the Titanic of ‘coffee culture chic.’ ‘Triple ‘C’’ she’d laugh walking in, in her smart little outfit. ‘Not enough lifeboats.’
　
“Okay,” Tandi says. “We have woman, thirty eight years old, attractive,” she glances from the laptop to Gina, who can’t slip into a comfortable position. It’s the crackled pleather sticking to her thighs, and the small of her back where her shirt keeps riding up. “Trust me.”
　
Gina shakes her head. “I don’t think I need this.”
　
“No! C’mon, there’s a whole world out there waiting. Your soul mate’s out there!” Tandi’s a loud speaker. Surprisingly, the socially dead don’t notice. Well, if they do they don’t care. “You need to do it for the adventure. Okay, do you still puke after any meals?”
　
“That,” Gina tells her, the disgusted shock still laying in her throat, “was twenty years ago, and it isn’t funny.”
　
“Well, not funny ‘ha-ha,’ but funny. Bulimic is bad, anyhow. We’ll say slim,” Tandi says, and eyes her friend up and down. Gina doesn’t like the look from men, and it feels so much worse from a friend and a woman. It’s the sharp flash in Tandi’s eyes and the way she purses her lips. The chair doesn’t let Gina squirm. “And we’ll say charming. Men like charming.”
　
“How about awkward?” Gina says with some doubt.
　
There really isn’t room to doubt Tandi. This is the first pass. Next week, she’ll be amping it up -- tightening her little blurb to home in on her target audience. Tandi, the connoisseur of hyperbole, the aficionada of exaggeration, the virtuoso of the lie.
　
“No. Na-na-na-NO! We’ll go with sweet,” Tandi says as she types, “and sincere,” she muses, “and spontaneous! Four ‘s’ words. Guys will think the sexy on their own.”
　
Another café patron glances down at Tandi as she passes the pair in their not-so-comfy window seats. She gives the woman a sneer. Gina just shakes her head. Tandi is thirty-six going on sixteen.
　
“I’m not spontaneous,” Gina tells her.
　
Tandi huffs and grabs hold of the screen. Her bright red nails sparkle against her notebook’s electric blue. “Did you have this penciled in your little day planner?” she demands.
　
“No- but you’re the spontaneous one.”
　
“Yeah, yeah -- me… you, what’s the difference?”
　
Gina frowns. “Thank you for boiling me down to a couple of ‘s’ words.” This is what her life has become.
　
“Well, since you’re not just a pretty face, we need to say what you like to do.” Tandi picks up one of Gina’s magazines from the table. She chuckles at the cover, her perfect red lips mouthing each word as she reads it. “You like fashion porn.”
　
“Jeez- they’re glamour magazines.” Gina says, emphatically quiet as if to silence her friend. “They’re not porn.”
　
“It’s crap. We’ll say… well read. Oh, that attracts the wrong types… likes reading. Simple, vague- I’m brilliant! Did you change your ring-tone again?”
　
“Yeah, so?” Gina asks, glancing down to her purse.
　
It was a waste, really. No one ever called but Tandi, and she had her own tone.
　
“Okay, likes music.”
　
“What?” Gina asks.
　
“Trust me, girlfriend. Hmm- no… this sounds like you sit on your lazy ass all day-”
　
“I don’t sit-” Gina begins to protest.
　
“Stt! I said sounds like. Sounds like you do nothing. This is advertizing. We have to appeal to the target market. We need something active, like a sport. Guys dig sports.”
　
“I don’t like sports,” Gina said, picking up one of her magazines.
　
“Jogging.”
　
“I don’t jog.”
　
“Fine. Walking on the beach.”
　
“Beach? What beach?”
　
“Oh, fine!” Tandi huffs and pouts. “Just walking then.”
　
Gina sets he magazine into her lap and leans over closer to Tandi. “Walking… is a sport?”
　
“You saying you don’t walk?” Tandi says, and lets the silence hang for an uncomfortable count of five. “Good. Now what do you want in a new man, hmm?”
　
Gina glances at the magazine again frowning, picking it up from her lap. You can see in her eyes she’s never looked like the woman on the cover. For as many articles as she’s read, she’s barely used them.
　
“I don’t want a new man. I want my old man back,” Gina says, tossing aside the magazine. “It really is fashion porn.”
　
“Seeks prince charming for fun times, and maybe more!” Tandi chuckles.
　
“Oh, come on,” Gina shakes her head, “don’t write that!”
　
“There’s not enough spice.”
　
“I don’t want spice. I just want my bland, comfortable life back.”
　
Tandi sighs, glancing over the LCD. It could be the angle of the light, but the malice in her eyes isn’t there. For once, her eyes are soft… serene. They look like they belong to someone older. Gina bites her lip as they sit there staring. As rare as it is, for a moment they connect.
　
“We’ll do sincere and calm,” Tandi says.
　
“How about ‘I’m sorry come back?’” Gina offers.
　
“Hey- you gotta trust someone sometime. Should be me. Sincere and calm.”
　
Gina feels sick inside. It’s all torture, but somehow, there is a spark of warm hope glowing under the churning black anxiety. “Okay,” she nods, picking up another one of her magazines. “Okay.”