love - Writers Forum

snoopy111 · 11-29-2007, 01:17 PM

how does it feel like to be in love? what makes you know you are in love? my short story is about 2 people in love but i need to know how to show there love for each other. thanks.

hobbish · 11-30-2007, 02:21 PM

deary me. Experience is a wonderful teacher, snoops. I wouldn't write about people in love until you had been.

Zensati · 12-02-2007, 07:23 PM

Yeah. why don't you find love and then you can draw from experience. Love is an emotional state, Each person will have a different experience of love so you can't really generalise about it.

FMK · 12-02-2007, 08:43 PM

In my experience, love isn't something that can be rightly described in words. You just... feel it, and you know it's real. If you can accurately describe it, then chances are it isn't real love.

Mirror · 12-02-2007, 10:10 PM

Love is an overdose of sadomasochism.

Zensati · 12-02-2007, 11:01 PM

Love is like a drug. You get very high but then you gotta come back down.

Amara-J · 12-03-2007, 06:11 AM

Quote:

my short story is about 2 people in love but i need to know how to show there love for each other.

Frankly speaking, how one reacts in such a situation depends a lot on age, maturity levels, culture, religion, and personalities.

But like the others have said, love is something best experienced before being written about. Love, death, birth... all those are made more powerful when you've actually seen it, felt it, and can talk about it.

If you want to read a book, though, the "5 Languages of Love" by Gary Chapman talks about common ways people express love for each other. See if you can get a copy.

Angelpie · 12-04-2007, 08:47 AM

Of course there's nothing like actually experiencing something yourself and drawing from that experience however I would like to add my two pence worth to see if it helps you on your quest to get an understanding of love - I always reply to anyone that asks me how do I know I love my Husband by saying that despite 9 years of being together I still cannot imagine a future without him. Whatever happens I want to share it with him because I love and respect him as he does me. I look forward to coming home to spend time together and making plans for our future. Plus I can call him any name under the sun and he has to forgive me, because he loves me

Love comes in so many different ways and is expressed in a million more, you don't have a personal experience yet but what about the people around you - you can get some ideas from watching how they behave with each other and reading whatever you can.

Good luck

KeshKesh7 · 02-18-2008, 03:09 PM

Two words: romance novels.
In fact, I highly suggest the cheap, throw-away-once-you're-done reading types, beacause they generalize about love and character types you can add on to depending on your story.
I dunno if you've ever been in love, but if you have it still doesn't mean you haev the experience needed to write love. People fall in love a lot of different ways and it's experienced differently by each person.
So ignore what everyone else is saying about experience. Yes, it helps, but unless you're writing a memoir it's not going to help that much. Especially if your characters aren't Mary Sue's.
Pick up a couple of romance novels, turn their generalized love into something believable (based on your characters and plot), and have fun.
Think of it as research.

Hodge · 02-18-2008, 05:19 PM

Worst. Advice. Ever. Romance novels have nothing to do with love and everything to do with romanticized lust. They're essentially porn. Anyone who has actually been in love—and I mean people who've really been in love, not high school drama queens/kings who confuse the tingling in their genitalia with actual love—knows that it takes work, it isn't passionate every moment of every day, and involves a hell of a lot more than sex and physical contact.

Xejon · 02-18-2008, 06:06 PM

Love? Love is hard to describe. Let me turn it around on you... who are your lovers? What do they care about? What do they want? Love isn't an intricately complicated clock, that only runs with all the correct gears in place. Love is this kind of amorphous, unquantifiable emotion that draws more upon the personalities of the individuals involved in it than on any generalization I could make.

My advice to you would be to consider who your lovers are and what they want from life and relationships, and just write. If their personalities and desires are compatible, then you'll probably understand why it makes sense for them to be together. Otherwise you're forcing it.

Also, love doesn't have to make sense on the surface. The head cheerleader can be dating the skinniest, ugliest loser nerd ever if their interior motivations are compatible. That's really something only you, the writer, can judge properly.

KeshKesh7 · 02-18-2008, 11:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KeshKesh7

Two words: romance novels.
In fact, I highly suggest the cheap, throw-away-once-you're-done reading types, beacause they generalize about love and character types you can add on to depending on your story.
I dunno if you've ever been in love, but if you have it still doesn't mean you haev the experience needed to write love. People fall in love a lot of different ways and it's experienced differently by each person.
So ignore what everyone else is saying about experience. Yes, it helps, but unless you're writing a memoir it's not going to help that much. Especially if your characters aren't Mary Sue's.
Pick up a couple of romance novels, turn their generalized love into something believable (based on your characters and plot), and have fun.
Think of it as research.

Emphasis on the generalzation of love in romance novels.
If you're writing about love, you might want to check out the genre based on it. I like the cheap ones because they're simple.
I stand by my advice.

Hodge · 02-18-2008, 11:48 PM

Romance novels are based off of love like fantasy is based off of the Middle Ages.

In other words, both of them claim to emulate reality but really just make a bunch of shit up for the sake of a plot that millions will pay money for. And then you end up with countless idiots who really believe epic sword fights, knights in shining armor, and virtuous kings existed during the medieval period. Just like romance novels produce countless idiots who believe in love at first sight, Fabio, and everlasting passion.

There is no love in romance novels. There is a fantasy. That is all. Turning to them when trying to understand love in the real world not only doesn't help, but it also harms in that it teaches people that love should involve unbridled passion, chiseled abs, no flaws, and Fabio, which makes people set unrealistic standards, which keeps them perpetually single, which makes them buy more shitty romance novels to masturbate to and fantasize about... It's a vicious cycle.

Ty_lol · 02-18-2008, 11:58 PM

I hope my grandmother doesn't masturbate as much as she reads romance novels. Cus that would be a lot...

Malone · 02-19-2008, 03:25 AM

The best/worst feeling you can imagine.
When you're in love, the other person has total control over you, as nasty as that makes the whole thing sound.
Sadomasochism is almost perfect beyond belief, mirror. I'm going to steal that...