Describing a Guy - Writers Forum

NoWorries · 07-06-2004, 11:44 AM

So I'm writing this story about a guy and a girl. I have no problem describing every facet of her, but when I want her to notice that this guy has pretty(or handsome?) eyes, it feels really weird and wrong and sounds too fruity to be part of my story.

Anyone else have these problems, or what?

Thanks?

WiCkEd · 07-06-2004, 12:46 PM

I sometimes find it much harder describing a male for two reasons:

1) Since I am a male, I don't exactly know what a woman looks for in a man.

2) I don't think the way I do describe my male characters from a woman's point of view is realistic.

So I usually will have my mother or a female friend read what I've written and ask them if it seems realistic. Hope that helps a little.

ink stained dreamer · 07-06-2004, 03:25 PM

Since I have a history of being boy crazy (lol) I usually don't have a problem describing them. It would help to know more about the context of the story, but just talk about how she feels when she looks in those eyes; maybe there is something significant about the color, etc. Does this help? You can PM me if you want to talk about it some more, 'cause I'd be happy to help.

thamior · 07-16-2004, 02:01 PM

heh, heres an example:

She wathed him get up from the couch, she giggled silently as he brushed his dark hair with his hand, it was a habit of his and she found it funny. He wasnt built but she had never liked that, no he had the physic of a computer nerd, but he was handsome. He may not have had much muscle but he was ver comfortable to rest on, His smile was small and warm, and his eyes were dark and inviting. He had a mdeium sized nose that was rather indistinct and his mullet of hair swept his forehead. His face was rather long but not in an unattractive was, and through all his hair you couldnt see his ears. He was very tall probally a littl e shorter than six and a half feet.
I could go on, but it's not my story

. you get the basic point. ive been told i can describe well but I disagree so dont critisize it if you dont think its helpful just ignore it

. and good luck

eleutheromaniac · 07-18-2004, 10:10 AM

I think what Noworries problem is is that he is letting his personal hang-ups, in this case homophobia, get in the way of describing the scene acurately. This is a common problem in writing: "Will they think I'm gay." "Will they think I'm a geek." "Will they think I'm stupid." and so on. An artist should never allow himself to get in the way of his art. Once he does, it ceases to be art. So ask yourself what is more important: your art, or what people may or may not think of you?

thamior · 07-20-2004, 01:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eleutheromaniac

I think what Noworries problem is is that he is letting his personal hang-ups, in this case homophobia, get in the way of describing the scene acurately. This is a common problem in writing: "Will they think I'm gay." "Will they think I'm a geek." "Will they think I'm stupid." and so on. An artist should never allow himself to get in the way of his art. Once he does, it ceases to be art. So ask yourself what is more important: your art, or what people may or may not think of you?

on that note heres a good exercise.....

Take a paper and pen/pencil and give yourself maybe a minute and right down the description of a person you know (or are creating). don't stop to worry about anything nd dont change anyting. when your done look it over. if your putting it in a story just take peices and put them in for instance lets say you put -Large Nose- :

When she looked at his face her eyes were immeadietly drawn to the formidable nose.

A_MacLaren · 07-22-2004, 10:10 AM

I have no problem describing guys. Burly, tall, athletic, slender, thin, skeletal, emaciated, round, cherubic, I've used them all.
When I have to describe women, I guess I come over all bashful.

Mentair · 07-24-2004, 12:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eleutheromaniac

I think what Noworries problem is is that he is letting his personal hang-ups, in this case homophobia, get in the way of describing the scene acurately. This is a common problem in writing: "Will they think I'm gay." "Will they think I'm a geek." "Will they think I'm stupid." and so on. An artist should never allow himself to get in the way of his art. Once he does, it ceases to be art. So ask yourself what is more important: your art, or what people may or may not think of you?

eleuther put it PERFECTLY! Let your self go.. dont worry about what others will think or say..( wich is nothing considering they are reading it from the characters point of view.. and not YOURS)
Try to put yourself in your characters point of view.. you should have an idea of how your characters mind frame is.. and how he/she thinks.. go from there.. be your character.. use IMAGINATION!

Alys R. · 07-31-2004, 02:37 AM

I wouldn't describe eyes as pretty anyway. Well, maybe.

Dude, do we not see the same things here? Do we not all have eyes? I can look at another girl and think she's pretty, I can look at a guy and think he's a guy. Follow up with descriptions if you look at something objectively...

...Or don't use description. There's tons of stories where characters are developed very well, without ever mentioning the deep blue of his gentle eyes or the full pout of her soft lips.

Stefanie · 09-12-2004, 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by eleutheromaniac

I think what Noworries problem is is that he is letting his personal hang-ups, in this case homophobia, get in the way of describing the scene acurately. This is a common problem in writing: "Will they think I'm gay." "Will they think I'm a geek." "Will they think I'm stupid." and so on. An artist should never allow himself to get in the way of his art. Once he does, it ceases to be art. So ask yourself what is more important: your art, or what people may or may not think of you?

Well, for me, it would depend on which form I use for the story.

I think a great tip would be to use "he" and "she" and not "I". If I would have inspiration for a story with a sexy woman for instance, I would feel better if I have to write "she" and "he" than "I" (except in quotes of course).

Ralizah · 09-12-2004, 03:43 PM

Meh, this is the problem with the male tendency towards homophobia. Most men grow up with the persuation that they need to be 'macho,' which is sad, really.

If men think that their eyes being pretty to a girl makes them any less manly, it's because they're afraid of what they've been bred to be afraid of.

If a person's eyes are pretty, they're pretty. There's no getting around that.

As an artist, it's your responsibility to not let your personal bias get in the way of your art. Unless you're writing for a distinctly male audience, don't you need an objective viewpoint to appeal to both sexes? Heterosexual romance is something that encompasses both genders, so trying to macho-cize your viewpoint is going to limit its range and take away from the beauty of the portrayed romance.

The problem with defined genders is that it leads to repressive views of something that's universal - men and women don't fall in love, people fall in love. Whether it's boy x boy, girl x girl, boy x girl, it's something that shouldn't be restrained in its portrayal and execution in any form by our narrow gender stereotypes.

Art is a reflection of the soul - don't let biases in society infiltrate it.

eMBeR Chan · 09-12-2004, 07:43 PM

Being bi I've never had the problem of describing a person from the other sex's point of view. I'm lucky I guess.

Kat · 09-16-2004, 03:36 PM

I don't know that your sexual oriantation should have anything to do with it. Your work portrays you as an artist not as a man, woman, homosexual or heterosexual. I would have no trouble describing another woman's lush breasts if the story called for it, but that doesn't mean that I am a lesbian. I think that you are putting to much emphasis on sex. It was just a question about words, which by themselves are asexual.

Shaun1138 · 09-30-2004, 10:00 AM

the trick is to be honest...use the language evenly and avoid cliches if possible. if there's one thing people instinctively know alot about...it's people.

the truth is that all men can see if another man is handsome or not to a certain extent. it does not mean they're gay (not that that should be an issue), what it does mean however is that when men/women point out the less attractive one in the crowd(of their own gender), they're also admitting to knowing the difference...its nature.

S.

pharseer · 09-30-2004, 12:47 PM

For me, the bottom line is that everyone looks for something different in their romantic (or sexual) partners, men and women. Just talking with friends, the first thing I look at or for in a guy isn't necessarily what my gyrlfriends are looking at. So my advice is to:

a) take yourself out of the equation. Stop thinking about how you would think about this character and think about what the other character(s) notice about this person.

b) think about what makes this person special. It could be a big nose, or an ordinary face with an extraordinary smile, or really graceful hands.