jellyfish

I hesitate to post another piece, my others having been so thoroughly trounced. Well, either I am not a poet, or I am different type than those frequenting this site. Either way, the journey should be worth taking. Flail away!

Harley

Soft eyes,
moist, pink tongue.
Ears pricked,
head cocking, side to side.

A faint whine,
dancing toenails on the
hardwood floor,
in anticipation of…

Stinko!
Ears back in shame,
a low crouch, a tender kiss,
“Oh, Dad, don’t be like this.”

Sashaying hips turn into
muscles flexing, a whiplash
at the end of the lead.
A cough, a choke, some slack, and then,

A sprint, a shriek.
Silence.
A shake of the head, a lick of the chops,
“Oh, Dad, you didn’t say it would taste like this.”

__________________
jellyfish

just another day in paradise

Baron

An amusing read. I enjoyed it. Tell me, have I trounced your poems? I rarely come down heavy on someone unless I know them well enough to believe that they're mature enough to deal with it, the emphasis being on knowing them. I do get that one wrong occasionally, however

__________________

jellyfish

Thanks, Baron. And, no, you have not trounced my work. I probably trounce it more than anyone and am simply projecting. I am tough enough to take whatever your comments may be, so don't be shy. I have appreciated your comments and hope they continue as I explore my newly found interst.

jel

__________________
jellyfish

just another day in paradise

Garden of Kadesh

I completely misinterpreted this the first time I read this. I'm always peering between the lines to try to find hidden themes, and I ALWAYS end up looking too far. My first impression was that this was the scene of a rape. Lolz, I know. Leave me alone.

That aside, I find these kind of poems unbearably saccharine. That's my personal preference though, so don't take it to heart.

__________________
"Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them."

- Catch 22

jellyfish

G of K,

Thanks for your comments. In my work, hidden meanings shall be easily visible, so don't work too hard. Yes, perhaps a bit sweet, but also a story of a hunter going for the kill. The duplcity of being sweet and ruthless...

__________________
jellyfish

just another day in paradise