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Poetry Poems, Haiku & Tanka etc.

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Old 01-28-2008, 09:13 AM   #1
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Doc Holliday.

Doc Holliday.


The speediest slinger in the west,
a nervy setting around the eyes,
a gun strapped an inch below his vest -
cocked before the bullet flies.

So drunk he’s seeing double,
staring into empty space
with a gun for each of ya’,
watching your every pace.

He keeps alive with his calm,
liquid reflexes to match the feral -
a gun spinning in his palm
With a loaded barrel.

He’s your huckleberry,
a gambler and a drinker,
leading cowboys on a merry
dance - a thinker.

He’s the guy from just out of town,
with a steel in his scope,
and an understated frown
when he draws his gun on a rope
from just under his coat,
in his hand without a cigarette;
leaves a hole - dead centre throat,
Or straight through the head;
the only slinger to die in his bed.
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Old 01-28-2008, 09:18 AM   #2
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You've been watching "Tombstone".
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Old 01-28-2008, 09:24 AM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Baron View Post
You've been watching "Tombstone".
I know, I watched it on dvd again yesterday and I just wanted to write a poem for Val Kilmer's version of him. Brilliant character.
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Old 01-28-2008, 09:25 AM   #4
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Enjoyed this, overall - although the rhythm falters in various places (i.e. stanza 1, line 3). Stanza 2 verges on literal. Other than that, a sound poem. Stanza 3 flows particularly well.
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Old 01-28-2008, 09:42 AM   #5
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"Hell, I got lots of friends."

"I don't."

Love that movie, his character in particular. Good poem MOTB.
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Old 01-28-2008, 09:57 AM   #6
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Yep it was a fun read and a good salut to Mr Kilmer's rendition.

Though, this reply probably won't register as the forum seems shagged again

Good to read you again Mermy

Jack
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Old 01-28-2008, 12:21 PM   #7
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Thanks for the comments everyone and yes, the forum is definitely glitchy at the moment. Gotta' love Doc Holliday.
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Old 01-28-2008, 06:37 PM   #8
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You did a pretty good job on this. I'm saying this seriously, it has a "drunk" kind of unsteady read to it. I can really picture Doc in this piece. I enjoyed it. Good, motw.
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Old 01-29-2008, 12:30 PM   #9
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The film was on tv on Sunday night, and "Wyatt Earp" with Kevin Costner on Monday. Doc Holiday saturation but the Val Kilmer rendidition is definitely the best.
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Old 01-29-2008, 08:46 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by vangoghsear View Post
"Hell, I got lots of friends."

"I don't."

Love that movie, his character in particular. Good poem MOTB.
Val Kilmer certainly did a better job than Dennis Quaid did in "Wyatt Earp"
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Old 01-31-2008, 10:25 AM   #11
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bump, ouch...
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Old 01-31-2008, 08:18 PM   #12
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Loved it MotB. I love Tombstone and Doc Holliday is my favorite character in it. No crit's at all, though I am a bit dissapointed "You ain't no daisy, you ain't no daisy at all!" Wasn't in there lol. Now im having the urge to watch Tombstone lol, I believe I have the DVD somewhere. Once again, nice work.
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Old 01-31-2008, 09:12 PM   #13
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What a fun poem you have here Mermaid, no crits just saying this was a goodie.
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