hypercool4life

To see myself the way you do
Means admitting my follies
Crushing my perception of me
Albeit true or false

To not care could be
A folly in itself
Blinding pride and arrogance
A certainty in my own perfection

Thinking what message your stare holds
Gives the night time monster a hold
On my sleep, my mind, my sanity
As words and deeds of the day gone past
Are replayed over and over in entirety

Upon further pondering
None of it really matters
For eventually
All that is matter
Meets its end.

__________________
In the begining was the word and the was with God and the word was God...
In the end there was man, and man became god.

citygirl

wonderful poem, thought provoking

CG

Wishing4Rain

Very thought provoking, also well written. My only issue with it, and this is just a personal opinion, was the varying sizes of the line's. Perhaps take unnecessary words out of longer lines, or add to the shorter lines. An example could be

~~~~~~~~
To not care could be
A folly in itself
Blinding pride and arrogance
A certainty in my own perfection
~~~~~~~~

The second line, "A folly in itself" is good, but short lines are most often the end of a stanza, if any short lines are written. I also see how it works short there rather than longer, this is just a personal opinion.

A very good piece, great job.

__________________
"A writer without crticque, is nothing"

"The reason I love the rain, is so other's won't see the tears falling from my eyes."

Pete_C

Given the subject matter, I found the POV of the poem to be too clinical. It's almost like cold third party analysis of a condition, rather than a personal view. It can only benefit by having some genuine honesty in there.