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Poetry Poems, Haiku & Tanka etc.

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Old 02-20-2006, 07:21 PM   #1
K-P
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Catalog Poem Assignment

Ok, I reworked this a little bit. With a new title, so I hope my point is a little clearer.

Fear Monger

There's poison in Halloween candy; a trick and a treat
and a frothing mouthed death. Guts like tar in the blistering
summer, hospital bills no one can afford. There's medical
malpractice; there's punctured prophylactics. There's free
love and there are homosexuals conniving to sully the
sanctity of marriage. There's Iran and France and Uganda
and the whole world to the north, to the south, and across
the sea; barbarians, the lot of them.

There are the bloated bodies of ocean scented refugees
floating to the shores of Miami. There are airline pilots
flying the drunken skies like the early morning highways
on New Years Day. There are mine explosions and
hurricanes with a hankering for gumbo and crawdads. There
are anthrax letters in the mail and, just outside your door,
there are flocks of death fluttering upon
gaunt and wicked wings.

There are men in rags, in towels, incensed at your freedoms
and pining for your blood. There are suicide bomb- wait, I
mean homicide bombers going boom on school busses. There
are sleeper cells planting dirty bombs in the toilets of
baseball stadiums, of airports, and maybe even
the White House, where Freedom soundly sleeps, tucked
tightly under blankets of iron and lace.

There are Muslims and Hindus and raging Atheists; there
are Communists and Democrats and dangerous minorities;
there are crack smoking baby snatchers and pot smoking
war protesters; there are free speech advocates, Internet
predators, labor unions;
there's Hillary Clinton;
there are liberals in the media and in the universities,
wielding their rhetoric like a flame to the flag. Don't they
know there's a war going on?

All of them are unpatriotic, ungodly, undeserving of
this great nation. We should torch their businesses;
we should burn their books and burn their homes;
we should slaughter their wives and rape their livestock;
we should throw into camps and swallow the key. But,
we better act quickly, the trains are leaving soon.

Last edited by K-P : 02-20-2006 at 11:46 PM.
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Old 02-20-2006, 08:06 PM   #2
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Finally. Someone tells it like it is. or not. I don't know what a catalog poem is, but this is pretty good stuff. Could be tightened a bit here and there, but nice imagery, stays on theme, I'd say you're on a good track. cheers.
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Old 02-20-2006, 09:26 PM   #3
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it's ok, but i strongly suggest you lose all those egregious capitals at the beginning of every line... and who's alan colmes?
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Old 02-20-2006, 10:02 PM   #4
K-P
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Alan Colmes is the weaker, liberal half of Hannity and Colmes on Fox News. He's a push over, and it's really irritating to watch him sit by while the Sean Hannity fear mongers, along with the rest of the Fox News crew.

Anyway, thank you for the comments. I'll try to tighten it up tonight, and perhaps think of a title more people could understand.
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Old 02-20-2006, 11:48 PM   #5
K-P
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I reworked this. Thank you for the tips so far, and I will check again for replies in the morning. Maybe I can even make a decent poem out of this.
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