adrinikling

Okay this is in paragraph style. I'd say it's more of a poem than anything else. I'm not sure if I should change the format or just leave it that way it is. I've been told it gets sort of confusing. So...




I Think I Might Profess Something To Myself

And so I looked from far away just wishing to travel a thousand miles, although it was just right next to me. And so I heard you laugh at things that didn’t make any sense to me, but I wish they did. I wish that I could understand why you smile with such bright teeth when things aren’t right. But of course you don’t know that things are wrong until they are brought up. And so I spend each day taking a step closer to you, just in hopes to come a little closer. Just as long as you don’t move farther away. So stay there until I catch up and we can be together.


And then there was that day when we finally made a connection. When I finally arrived at the place I wanted to be. When I finally understood what didn’t make any sense, and it still doesn’t, but that’s perfectly fine. As long as you sit here beside me, I’ll feel fine and laugh with everyone else. But still I want so much more and find myself still walking.


And soon you came to trust me with open arms. And you talk to me about things that no one else has heard. Or at least I want it that way. Can we sit down and have fun somewhere with nobody around? And it happens more than once where I feel elated, even though we’re just friends. And I can’t explain why, although I may think I love you. But ‘maybe’ isn’t enough to explain to me a yes or no.


And why must decisions be so tough once they come to the heart? If I say it aloud, does that make it true? I want to scream it at the top of my lungs and breathe out my uncertainty. But I can’t scream just yet, so I’ll mumble to myself at quiet times when no one can hear me. I’ll just wait until the time when my mouth is ready to open wider, or maybe when my heart is wider.


And more fun times do come where I can feel love pulsing through my body. I think I am sure, but I still have to say ‘I think’. And I can find so many times to say that I might like you. And it’s only a might, but I might be denying myself of something that ‘I think’ I want so badly.


And a profession to myself is all I need to find my happiness. And a confession to you is all you need to know how I feel inside. But I can still be there and laughing with you. And I can still be there close to you. But my heart is still walking, one step each day, to try to come closer to yours.


And now I think I might be crazy, but I know that I’m in love.