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Poetry Poems, Haiku & Tanka etc.

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Old 11-19-2005, 01:44 AM   #1
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Join Date: Nov 2005
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yamini is on a distinguished road
Smile you are my strength !!

At times i wonder sitting alone!!
what made me feel so intimate to you....
you have nothing in similar to me , to my life....and yet i like you for what you are.......
i try hard to occlude you...from entering my mind........but...
i came to realize it is impossible....
your presence is longed by the inner emotions that dwell in my heart....
The emotions of love,devotion,and serenity.....call you upon me to bless me with the most precious thing.....YOU
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Old 11-19-2005, 05:59 AM   #2
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tanmay is on a distinguished road
Hey Yamini,

Wow! That was a very touching love poem.

Love is like that only. It can happen with anyone at the most unexpected of the times with most unexpected persons. But all that is irrelevant in front of affection, devotion and serenity.

Your poem described this concept wonderfully. Well done!

Regards,
Tanmay.
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Old 11-29-2005, 01:34 AM   #3
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Akash is on a distinguished road
great

Hi Yamini

Its a very much heart blowing poem. It tells how much one can
love the other who may not even feel for the person....
Very true love...

Carry on...
__________________
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Akash
_______________________________________________
"There is a difference between an objective and actions. Unless you understand your objective you will be wasting your time in actions. Know your objective first."
- Swami Vivekananda.
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Old 11-29-2005, 11:08 AM   #4
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Jimbob is on a distinguished road
Yamini,
Most love poems say about the same things and I'm afraid this is no exception. All this has been said many times before.

Although I can't help you with the content, perhaps I can give you a few pointers on grammar and language.

Jimbob

[delete} (add)

Quote:
Originally Posted by yamini
At times i wonder(while) sitting alone[!!]
what made me feel so intimate [to] (with) you....



you have nothing in [similar] (common with ) [to] me , to my life....and yet i like you for what you are.......
i [try] (tried) hard to [occlude] (keep) you...from entering my mind........but...
i came to realize it is impossible....
your presence is longed (for) by the [inner] emotions that dwell in my heart....
The emotions of love,devotion,and serenity.....call you [upon me] to bless me with the most precious thing.....YOU
Jimbob is offline   Reply With Quote
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