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| Poetry Poems, Haiku & Tanka etc. |
07-30-2005, 06:08 PM
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#1
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Best Seller
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: san francisco, ca.
Gender: Male
Posts: 504
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About Clouds.
"I guess I've never watched
anyone write a poem before," she said.
"Do you want me
to write a poem about you?" I said.
"No," she said. "I want you
to write about clouds."
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07-30-2005, 06:14 PM
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#2
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Profound Writer
Join Date: May 2005
Location: At my desk, with my pen
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,035
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ha ha ha, I'm just assuming that this might actually be about someone... and if so, nice way of including both "her" and clouds! 
__________________
GOD HELP ME!
IT'S THE SOUND THAT MAKES ME PUNCH INFANTS! (but not ms. vodka's)
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07-30-2005, 09:25 PM
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#3
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Prolific Writer
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Gender: Male
Posts: 444
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jjd, your poems never fail to strike a chord with me, even if it's just a simple grin, as with this piece.
Thank you for sharing.
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--This space intentionally left blank--
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07-30-2005, 09:26 PM
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#4
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Writing Machine
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,741
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This is so like something I would write, I just have to say I LOVE IT.  I would have gone and put it in a looong poem though and you have made this gem in just six lines. Lovely. warm regards huni.
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each time we see the face ...it is our own ideas of him which we recognize. Proust
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07-31-2005, 10:03 AM
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#5
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Wordsmith
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Back 'home' on Tinian!
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,445
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less is definitely more here... a perfect example of knowing when to stop!
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For 100% free writing help/mentoring:
www.saysmom.com
"You must BE the change you wish to see in the world." Gandhi
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07-31-2005, 05:02 PM
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#6
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Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Cologne, Germany
Posts: 23
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Beautiful! Just beautiful, really.
Simplicity is the key to genious... I never got to master that - but you truly do! *smiles*
I'll keep that poem in mind for while!
Somehow it hits a deeper meaning in me, but I'm not sure yet, which it is...
I'll let you know when I find out !
luv
Laila
__________________
"... And I wrote the first faint line,
faint, without substance, pure
nonsense, pure wisdom,
of someone, who knows nothing..."
from: Pablo Nerdua, "Poetry"
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07-31-2005, 06:28 PM
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#7
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Writer
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Bahrain
Posts: 36
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I've always been so amazed by how some things can be so simple but also so incredibly deep. Your poem is beautiful. Thank you for sharing.
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08-01-2005, 01:12 PM
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#8
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usually when i read things, i frown habitually.
when i come across one of your poems, i can physically feel the etched frown disappear.
it feels nice.
it feels nice to read your poetry J.JD. maybe that's why i like it so much.
vodka
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08-01-2005, 08:29 PM
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#9
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Best Seller
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: san francisco, ca.
Gender: Male
Posts: 504
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hello...
103 smalls
peter thomas
huni
mammamaia
searching neverland
mona
&
ms. vodka...
thanks to all of you for your kind and positive comments!
sincerely,
john. john doe.
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