PaperDoll

A pill wont stop this creature from slicing into my arm,
A pill wont stop or save me from all this harm,
I try to laugh the pain away but sometimes pain is just too real,
Something that laughter could never really heal.

You come home to find me walking into doors,
And a million small brown bottles surrounding me on the floor,
I feel your eyes give me a cold hard stare, as you wonder who i am,
And you don't try to help me even though your the only one that can.

As you ponder on how this came to be my fate,
I just think of you and the words you said, full of so much hate,
And you watch me now as i lie on my death bed,
You move towards me but it's too late, ive already taken my last breath.

And im an angel now, the thing you said that i would never be,
But you cant stop me now as from your chains ive finally broken free.

ms. vodka

this is pretty interesting, but the rhyme comes off as a bit forced, and it's a bit wordy in spots. also, it seems as though you are switching up tenses throughout.

i suggest an edit, maybe play with the form a bit, and try to keep yourself in present tense for impact's sake.

but the subject and what you have to say is very interesting.

vodka