inamorato - Writers Forum

A · 07-21-2005, 01:24 PM

You love me,
..dont you?

**Penelope** · 07-21-2005, 01:43 PM

Quote:

this is my story, if you dont like it...i have more

A · 07-21-2005, 01:44 PM

do i get the feeling you dont like me very much pene?

**Penelope** · 07-21-2005, 01:47 PM

Pen works fine for me - pene makes me feel like pasta.

Poem? um .. well .. to tell the truth - I'm fond of you but wonder if there's any substance.

A · 07-21-2005, 01:49 PM

hmm..how can i please you pen, in a world where you cant please everyone?

**Penelope** · 07-21-2005, 01:51 PM

yeah - I hear you .. thanks for dropping the 'e' tessoro.

A · 07-21-2005, 02:06 PM

penne is not so bad though, its a very nourishing product, that thus far, you seem to be

-----

for clarity, i offer a wee sypnopsis...

YOU love ME
you LOVE me
you love ME
YOU LOVE ME
you love me
you love me
you love me
you love me
you love me
you love me
you love me

...dont you?
...dont you?
.....dont you?

true interpretation exists when one can see beyond the confines of physical text. even IF the words are minimal in totality. does that make sense? or should i perhaps check myself into the psych unit today?

**Penelope** · 07-21-2005, 02:52 PM

well ... I'm not up on the psycho-babble but this seems to be all about seeking affirmation through repetition - I could spout reassuring platitudes or pontificate on the merits of ... oh .. pick a flavour I've forgotten what month it is.

mswietek · 07-21-2005, 03:03 PM

I can appreciate a good minimalist poem, but I think there isn't really enough here to make anything of it. Yes, interpretations can (and perhaps should) expand beyond what is on the page, but I don't think it works in this case.

Michael

A · 07-21-2005, 04:03 PM

how can some writers be so limited in their imagination? did i not make myself clear? i was not seeking affirmation through repetition...this whole discussion is the perfect example of one interpretation...

you love me,...DONT YOU??!
-------

to further my interpretation for those failing to grasp 5 simply complicated words...

you: human entity
love: solicitude / emotion
me: I
dont: NO

Y.O.U = Your Opinion Unwanted
Y.O.U = Your Own Universe
L.O.V.E = Linguistics of Visual English
L.O.V.E = Look Observe Verify Enjoy
L.O.V.E = Loss of Valuable Energy
M.E = Marriage Encounter
M.E = Mature Equivalent
M.E = Mental Endurance
M.E = Mental Excellence
D.O.N.T = Disturbing Opponents' No Trump!
[these are ACTUAL acronyms]

you love me..dont you? ........ even if youve out-grown your parents, i find myself asking this question, and ive never known the answer, that doubt consumes your soul, why i care, i dont know.. i just know i need to recitify it before the damage is done. i dont even know what love is. can you believe noone has ever told me 'i love you'. WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT FEEL LIKE!!! is it too much to ask for affection? is it too much to give it? is it too much to be proud of your own flesh and blood? is it to much to grant exceptance? is it too much to understand? YOU LOVE ME...DONT YOU? im asking this freakin question, and both of you have replied the way my parents have. i spent almost 2 whole days dwelling on 5 words. 5 words that physically and psychologically effect me in ways that have haunted me for 18 years.

Quote:

Originally Posted by michael

in this case it dosent work

....yes dad..thankyou sir.

does anyone wanna lend me a noose?

A · 07-21-2005, 04:03 PM

ps...full moon

**Penelope** · 07-21-2005, 04:25 PM

good grief!

I can't think of a time I haven't said 'I love you.' to my son. My parents didn't verbalize and I noticed enough to make a change. My son says the same and sometimes before I do. I had no way of knowing this was your motive for writing this and .. for what it's worth .. I understand.

I almost always knew my parents loved me even if they didn't say it.

A · 07-21-2005, 04:47 PM

for me pen, even without love, i know that i have the substance you speak of.

your words made me feel an instantaneous warming deep within the centre of my chest. im glad you love your son. envious,...but glad.

dannyboy · 07-21-2005, 07:40 PM

prob for me is A the connections you are making between these lines and the emotions you wish me to pick up on are left in your mind. Give me a hand, help me out. Or not of course.

mswietek · 07-21-2005, 10:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by A

i spent almost 2 whole days dwelling on 5 words. 5 words that physically and psychologically effect me in ways that have haunted me for 18 years.

Ok. Your explanation explains a lot. What I think you need to realize (and which dannyboy alludes to) is that there isn't enough to your poem to pull that out. Giving the reader some more insight as to why these words are haunting in the poem itself, will go a long way towards creating in the reader the feelings you want to convey.

Michael