dannyboy

This and No More

Often an ache destroys peace;
shatters it
like shards of a mirror,
each edge so acute
they manage to slice the soul.

So often the ache creates havoc,
actions fumble,
something spills free
causing an embarrassment:
granite pretense
shimmers like the mirage
it really is.

The ache to kiss,
to connect lips to lips,
to plunge tongue into liquid bliss!


Sometimes the ache
is a fantasy of pain,
a way of unraveling,
to lead astray;
a flagellation,
a lonely priest in a dark cell.

The ache, true or false,
exists in memories
of heartfelt beats
met when close and relaxed
in the expanse of a bed after sex;
in the silky delight
of skin next to skin,
each pore a volcano,
the lava urging to burst;
to erupt into a white hand
and caress the craters of the moon.

If everything is offered
and everything is not enough
then what is left?

How can the stars, the land,
the water be moved?

Screams cannot be stifled
when the knowledge enough
is not enough
fills the rivers and torrents
of self.

The ache remains,
clear, acute
and slowly dying
but not without a fight.

dannyboy

bump

journyman161

I started to read & have been called out. I like it although I will think some more on this before commenting. Back later.

__________________
*He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
*Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words? - Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
*Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it - Moses Hadas
*He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know - Abraham Lincoln

journyman161

And yet it is an ache we wouldn't be without, for that would mean we'd never dared to want or love.

Well written & very readable. My only suggestion would be -
Screams cannot be stifled
when the knowledge enough
is not enough
'Yet' fills the rivers and torrents
of self.

__________________
*He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
*Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words? - Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
*Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it - Moses Hadas
*He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know - Abraham Lincoln

dannyboy

could read it as 'enough is not enough' then you don't need the yet. Thnak you for commenting and yes it is better to have loved and lost etc....

journyman161

That makes it make more sense as written, but perhaps keep the phrase together on one line?

__________________
*He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary - William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
*Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words? - Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
*Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it - Moses Hadas
*He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know - Abraham Lincoln

dannyboy

no because I like that it can be read the first way you read it, this line tries to make you work at meaning/understanding - i don't mind that sometimes. It gives it more resonances?

petrel}

*whaaaaa* *sniffle* This pierced me to the heart.

Gorgeously and horribly sad.

__________________
A man's subconscious self is not the ideal companion. It lurks for the greater part of his life in some dark den of its own, hidden away, and emerges only to taunt and deride and increase the misery of a miserable hour.

P. G. Wodehouse, Uneasy Money

Achilles

And I bet you weren't talking about a headache. I thought that would be fun to say after so many deep comments.

Wonderful poem. It captured to essence of the ache to be loved in a refreshing way. It showed the beauty of love and sadness of what a life would be without love.

__________________
The Palace Flophouse

When Newton closed his eyes beneath a tree
and took the apple from the serpent, he
conceived the urge of humanity, plea, plea,
procreant desire and tendency.

dannyboy

thank you both for the feedback. Glad you liked this one. It is a really old one that i have just reworked and found that i liked it.

danny

johnjohndoe

many of the current posts are great, but I like to go back every-so-often and see what I may have missed the first time around.

I thought this was a great effort and deserved to have another run.

j.jd.