strangedaze

[disc:a0f6558c5b]Who knows what people will be offended by these days...[/disc:a0f6558c5b]


Watching atrocities
soldiers with bleeding gums
raping the human race with
shimmering machetes
in the moonlight
dismembered legs,
fragments of foregone conclusions
failure of reason
Mexican tap-dancing on tables
made of marble with a crimson glaze
ask me who I am
and I'll tell you nothing
say no evil, though I heard it
the screams coming from the bedroom
next door
hairline fracture walls
can't mask suffering
a cup of genocide, black,
no sugar,
not quite decaf because the rush,
they need the rush
of popped jugulars and
scalped babies and
posters of Marilyn Monroe

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His sins were scarlet, but his books were read.

European_Son

I like. But this needs to punch me harder, yet with more subtlety. Needs deeper description to paint a more vivid picture, but at the same time needs to be restrained enough to let me form my own imagery. This could go further, it's a great start, but I want to read more. I apologise if my analysis is confusing.

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the tea gods

strangedaze

Thanks for the comment, Euro Son. Though slightly ambivalent, I think your insight is very helpful

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His sins were scarlet, but his books were read.

mammamaia

i don't get the analysis and am not exactly sure of what the point of the poem is intended to be, but it sure isn't lacking punch, imo... the ending 7 lines are almost too toughly true to stand reading...

but, because i'm a philosopher who must watch it all, i couldn't not read this to the end...

hugs, maia

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