Thread: There is Time

There is time. Steady the mass, and hold back
the flow and stand at the periphery of time. Stay at
this moment, this epitome of life.

Why must you all rush towards
that nighttime ether far away?
Wait here for a moment, take your
sweet youth a moment, and your past look
back a moment.

My friends, where have you all gone?
Scattered as if each of you were one
spec of nothing in the ocean. My friends, where do
you stand in Heaven today? My friends, do you
find peace where you stand?

For this forlorn feeling,
of which I am too immature to describe,
holds my flow. But I can see those
precipices far ahead,
where we must all meet
one more time. Be it in love
in flight
in hatred dual,
or once more a reminiscing
of time.

So come,
let’s stand together in youth rather
than in judgement for one last time.
Until a time when our currents must not intertwined
until we reach that Place in the final hour.
Be it after tribulations,
or in bliss incomprehensive,
there we will meet.

That Place,
further up and further in the darkness,
but where light stands.
I wonder; will you endure to see it?
Steadfast, my friends!
Stay that way until the currents
Have ebbed away!

I am feeling that the message of the poem is to pause and enjoy your youth and not dash through life towards the nighttime. For me, the first two verses say it all. And the fifth verse says this again. I am not sure what the mass is in the first line or what the currents are in the penultimate line or the precipices in line 4?

I like the light and directive feel of the poem, and I think the unusual breaks of lines are part of that impression, although they can confuse a little!

I think that you could easily lose 2/3 of it to good effect - Too much repetition. I know it sounds harsh, but I would say exactly the same thing to myself - Secateurs pour verbiage are a poet's most useful tool...

I have spaced out the verses for clearer reading. Also, I've been thinking of cutting some repetition, but nighttime and its synonyms are staying. Nighttime is to represent an end. What that end is, well... I'll let you draw your own conclusions on that.

I was intrigued tot he very end. I enjoyed this, keep up the good work !