Thread: Remembering Marcy Fiengold

the beautiful
mediocre artist
unshaven
black-clad
pseudo-bohemian
long-graduated
still floating on the fringes
of half-ass academia
for a fee
she’d check my papers
inserting missing articles
left lodged in my dyslexic brain
accidentally and high
on darvocet
some dog-day sunday
on knees and elbows
stained raw umber
we made love
(not love per se)
four weeks
this went on
I gave her flowers
(fool)
she cocked her head
and smirking, said
thanks kid
(kid!)
and led me
to her musty mattress
one last time

Great style, albeit the subject matter is rough around the edges, I suppose only fitting for this girl/woman - I don't know her, but I feel like I do now somewhat - "pseudo-bohemian", "musty mattress" - I can see it all, whether I wanted to or not : )
almost like an "Anti-Ode"
---todd

Does your wife know about this Marcy, Joseph? lol. Anti-ode is quite befitting. I loved the subtle humor. Very entertaining and clever and of course, much enjoyed.

Best,
Lisa

Todd, thanks for reading. Anti-ode indeed. She's actually kind of typical of a certain kind of girl I knew in art school -- I've exaggerated a bit -- but not too much.

Lisa, sure, she knows, ha ha. "Marcy" is a composite though, of a girl who did proof my papers and who was very sweet -- the situation is more about her. But I wanted to do something that was less of a tribute, and not so pleasantly nostalgic or even bittersweet, so I combined her with someone else I knew at the time who I could portray in a more negative way -- for my anti-ode. Thanks for the read and comments.

Cheers

Originally Posted by JosephB

we made love
(not love per se)

I lol'd.

Well good, Bachelorette. I'm glad you found that line lol-worthy. Thanks for reading.

well, at least she was hot. hairy, but beautiful.

nice work, Joe. There's a lot of craft in this, although it reads effortlessly and clever.

You create a nice image. I loved the bracket parts, particularly

thanks kid
(kid!)

Haha! Good work.

ah, the folly of youth, which really isn't folly... just youth. i remember how all the hard lessons seemed so harsh and final, looking back i just smile, almost half wishing i could go back and relive the "thrill of new and naive moments". that's how this felt to me, not of regret, but just warm remembering. i liked the flow of this, like it's all one solid thought. enjoyed it very much.

wood

I was bewitched and enchanted ! Thanks--Peace--Jul

Originally Posted by JosephB

Well good, Bachelorette. I'm glad you found that line lol-worthy. Thanks for reading.

No prob; it was highly enjoyable. I would have written more, but I just didn't have anything useful to say--I wouldn't change a thing about it.

This is so squalid. Gotta love it!

Anti-ode is a perfect description of this. I enjoyed the read Joe and the images were, as always, great.

*sigh* Don't you just hate when someone can conjure the past with a few words, while you struggle to capture a thought with something under a thousand words? Damn! It's a rare talent and one I admire. Well done, sir.

Alan, don't see you in these parts too often. Thanks for stopping by and reading.

candid petunia -- thank you for reading and commenting. Was worried those parentheses things might come off as contrived. Glad you liked them.

wood, thanks. You're right -- you about nailed it. No regrets at all. Yeah, I tried breaking this -- but thought I'd try something where it all ran together. Glad that worked for you.

Squalid Glass -- I'm glad this registered on your squalid-o-meter. Thanks!

Gumby, thanks for reading!

CLN, that's quite a compliment. Thanks!

Cheers all.