Thread: Examining People (Mild Language)

There are those
who resemble
stray scratches
on a scantron sheet;
begging for erasure.

There are those
who deliberately
bleed a bit outside the bubble
in an effort to remain
unrecognized.

There are those
who are clueless
and fill in every answer
in the hopes
of getting something right
thereby disqualifying
everything.

Then there are those
who don't give a damn
and refuse to pick up
a pencil
accepting failure
as easily as a kiss.

Life is an exam
and it takes all kinds
I can't help but wonder
what goes on in the minds

of those who don't test well.

I thought this was a really interesting way of looking at people. Love the word play with "exam" and "examining," by the way. Well done. And I really loved the ending, actually. But I found it interesting that you're wondering what goes on in the minds of those who "don't test well" and yet everyone mentioned aboved clearly don't "test well." They want to be invisible (erased), they are afraid to be wrong (disqualifying everything), and they don't care if they fail. So I was actually more wondering about the people that do test well, instead of the ones that don't.

I'm probably rambling and not making sense. Ha, ha. But I actually thought that maybe having some "good testers" might make some really interesting contrast in this piece.

There are those
who resemble
stray scratches
on a scantron sheet;
begging for erasure.

Love the alliteration peppered around this stanza. Rolls off the tongue so nicely.

but I can't help wonder

Two things I want to point out there. The first is that we're missing a "but." And the second is the "can't." I love "can't" here. Because your voice throughout the entire poem was passive. "There are," "who are," etc. And that voice reminded me of a test, really, how everything is so precise and written out. But then we get to "can't." And it's like you're not longer this precise, perfect sort of direction. You become real and relatable. And then you go on to "don't" and it's the same sort of relatability. For me, that one word just made the entire poem.

I would, however, take out that first "but," since you'll be adding the second one. It would flow better, I think.

Really interesting write, Lisa. Thanks so much for sharing.

~Bay

I can't help but wonder if this has anything to do with what we discussed over PM...
Anyhow, I very much like this poem... I see double meanings everywhere, like shadows thrown around by a fire... nice.

First, I am truely puzzeled as to why this poem did not get the attention it deserves, too far down the page. I know, I myself am late, here, and hope to rectify my absence by giving this poem the honorable review it deserves.

My first question was, what the hell is a "scranton sheet?" I looked it up and realized it was key to the poem. A kind of true and false test. A lie dectector test, if you will. Oh, yes. "Begging for an erasure." You've already said so much in just one stanza.

You capsualize the all of the poem in its ending. My interpretation and Lisa correct me if I'm not on the same page as you: Society places expectations on us. If we fail to meet up to them then we are the outsiders. Some of the "we" need desperately to "pass." The "norm" tests well but what about those who think outside the box? Those who fail the sociatle test? I, for one, fail and am proud of it!

Life is an exam
and it takes all kinds
but I can't help wonder
what goes on in the minds

of those who don't test well.

But then:

Then there are those
who don't give a damn
and refuse to pick up
a pencil
accepting failure
as easily as a kiss.

Are you speaking of those who need to fit in the "norm" whatever that may be?

I can't help but site one of your famous alliterations:

bleed a bit outside the bubble

Now to the whole of it:

There are those
who deliberately
bleed a bit outside the bubble
in an effort to remain
unrecognized.

This is true but there are some who bleed outside the bubble to "be recognized."
The rebels.

Born a natural rebel, I read what I did into your poem. I studied Sociology so I found this poem riviting, up for several interpretations. You managed a very large topic very well!

Originally Posted by SilverMoon

My first question was, what the hell is a "scranton sheet?" I looked it up and realized it was key to the poem. A kind of true and false test. A lie dectector test, if you will. Oh, yes. "Begging for an erasure." You've already said so much in just one stanza.

"Scantron." If I am not horribly mistaken, Lisa refers to the sheets of paper covered in bubbles, used in many standardized tests, such as... math, and reading comprehension.
They usually have four answers for each question, and you are required to black the circle representing your answer with a 2HB pencil.

You capsualize the all of the poem in its ending.

Hmm?

Scranton: papers on which students mark answers to academic multiple-choice test questions. (They're now using machines)

You're right. I'm wrong. My source was apparently unreliable.

You capsualize the all of the poem in its ending. Hmm?

I thought so. But then we all think differently. Thank God. A boring world it would be, otherwise.

"accepting failure
as easily as a kiss."

Oh what a great line. It's just - effortless. Love it.

The metaphor of the scantron is very original and, I think, spot on. I feel I relate well to this poem. Very nice work.

Loved it Lisa, you my dear are really expanding your poetry and though I love your dark works, I am finding myself equally enjoying these which show a different side of you. People are intriguing and the human mind is so full of twists and turns. Just when we think we understand someone they throw us a curve. I love the idea of 'testing' and personally, I think that those who do 'test' well are sometimes the biggest frauds of us all, chameleons of society.

"There are those
who are clueless
and fill in every answer
in the hopes
of getting something right
thereby disqualifying
everything."

this stanza displays a very strong sense of desperation, i thought it was the strongest of all of them. in addition to doubt, fear, resignation, you covered quite a few negative human traits.i always frek out during tests, just reading this filled me with anxiety, lol. clever poem, the extended metaphors works. well done.

wood

I am so sorry for the delay but I was afraid to touch this for fear of jinxing my daughter. I wrote this because my daughter decided that being late daily was fashionable, unfortunately, her Geometry teacher disagreed. She messed up so much, her graduation was in jeopardy. Hence this piece because I could not understand how anyone could deliberately sabotage themselves, if that makes any sense. Quite frankly, I'm surprised anyone got this at all, it's really weird, even for me. I thought it would be passed over as rubbish, but I had to post it in lieu of screaming at her yet again, because that just makes her even worse. I am happy to report that she graduated on Monday, with an advanced Regents diploma no less, and ten months of morning civil wars have come to an end. Can't jinx her now that's she got that sheepskin. I'm terribly superstitious, lol.

Dear Bay, I'm glad it didn't seem like gobbledygook to you and that you liked the stanza for the alliteration. You weren't rambling at all, what you said is true, every type described doesn't test well, and I just don't get them. Now I hope I'm making sense. Good catch in the final stanza, I'll fix it as soon as I'm done here. I'm thrilled you picked up on the switch in tone at the end, that is exactly what I was hoping for. Thanks for your input, love.


Dear Trides, Although it could connect with our conversation, this is a separate animal and a vicious one at that. Double meanings that are like "shadows thrown around a fire", you should write a piece around that line, love, I'm so glad they didn't get lost in the ashes. I knew you'd get this one, and perhaps only you, lol.


Dear Law, I love your initial interpretation, it allows the piece to encompass a grander scheme. You gave the thing much deeper meaning, and for that I thank you profusely. The scantron was the key to figuring this entire mess out, to be honest, I'm having a hard time explaining what the heck I meant even to myself. I told you this thing was too weird. I really did like your feeling on this, as I too, reside outside the box. And you were spot on regarding the ending.


Dear SG, You have a great mind and a wonderful ability to say what's on it, in other words, you really know your stuff and I'm honored you liked this. As for that line, it's my favorite. Thank you so much.


Dear Cindy, I'm glad you like these little weird ones that pop up now and again. I'll never abandon my dark stories, but I find that these little things that I jot down of late are getting favorable responses, so I won't give them up either. This side is the real side, the actual thoughts, the stories are only figments of my imagination. It's really nice to know I can branch out a bit, don't want to fall into a rut that I can't climb out of. Your encouraging words made me really happy, love, for your opinion is very important to me. And you're right about those who test well, most of them cheat in one way or another.


Dear Wood, Truly honored by your words, love. I'm so happy you picked up on the desperation, that was the main point of that stanza. I think we all are in that position at one time or another, extremely unpleasant, and I knew my daughter was at that point and it hurt me to see her so whether she made her own mess or not. That last mad dash to get things done in time was harrowing to watch. I'm so glad it's over until she starts college...ugh...here we go again.

Thanks guys for taking time with this nutty thing.

All the best,
Lisa

Originally Posted by Chester'sDaughter

I thought it would be passed over as rubbish

I think it's the best one I've read from you, and that's saying something.

Lisa--is there no subject matter that you can't craft into an intriguing read??? well done! peace--Jul

Dear Trides, Thank you, love, that means an awful lot. Smiling here.


Dear Jul, I'm glad you enjoyed this weird thing, Jul. There are many things that escape my grasp as far as subject matter. It seems I've been banned for life from anything light or happy, every time I try to explore those avenues my pieces are complete crap. I'll keep trying, though, no ban is exempt from being lifted. lol.

Thanks to you both my dear ladies.

All the best,
Lisa