Thread: Beneath the Sacristy Carpet

Crumbs of evidence
were silently swept
beneath the sacristy carpet.

No need for parishioners
to be aware
their Sunday sermons
slithered past the guilty lips
of a sly serpent.

For thirty odd years -
from as many
different pulpits -
Father misled his flock,
the diocese never seeking
to defrock
a purveyor of pure evil.

Hundreds of times
his busy hands
abandoned benediction
to grope inside vestments
tailored for children.

Scarring souls;
marring minds;
leaving countless crumbs behind,
as halfhearted spare prayers
were offered up
by tight-lipped brethren
choked by stiff collars.

Until little Greg McGee,
now a strapping lad
of twenty three,
tracked Father down
and cornered him
in his latest rectory.

With a chalice of gold,
from which Savior's blood
was served to the fold,
Father's skull was crushed.
Bits of bone
silently scattered
amongst countless crumbs
beneath the sacristy carpet.

The church defiled
hallowed ground
with Father's burial,
as Greg McGee, finally free,
watched on in ecstasy,
both his hands and soul
unshackled.

For Pastor convinced police
feeble Father had two left feet
and was the cause
of his demise.
A little white lie
set to rest beside
serious sins

all silently swept
beneath the sacristy carpet.

Hell fire and Brimstone! You ripped aside the vestures of silence and exposed an ugly secret -and you did it beautifully! Great skill was shown in your choice of words---what was said and what you left unspoken. Your Poem has the natural progression of a great story..Once again-you blew me away with the content!!

You do lay out the narrative very nicely here - quite engaging.

The flow was perfect, and the build up to the violent climax was well balanced.

I wasn't pleased with the subject matter, although I know from my own career that it is an unfortunate reality in so many environs, not just church - really anywhere children are present and vulnerable.

I like that your condemnation was for the perpetrator himself, and not the entirely of the church - there are hints throughout this piece of a still living faith despite knowing the awful facts.

oh, I also liked how you bookended this poem with the "beneath the sacristy carpet" refrain - gives it a rounded finished feel

nicely done!
---todd

Quite a biting denouncement of an evil that will probably never be entirely unearthed. Your work always has a way of leaving a vivid scene lingering in my mind. The fallen chalice collecting drips and drops of the father's spreading blood spilled for his own sins. I don't know how I feel about the message in the second to last stanza, but if edited, I don't think I'd like the resulting change in aftertaste you've left with the reader.

EDIT: Also, I'd like to second todd's sentiment about distinguishing between the man and his calling.

You already know how I feel about this one, well done sweetie.

Now, here you have a woman who was raised in the Catholic church. I've witnessed the unjust. Now, I'm not entirely condeming the church but we read all to many stories about how the church will hide and protect priests who've been rightly accused of child abuse. I'll be quiet now before this post gets moved to Debate. But here, Lisa, you lyrically spew a truth so well. This is what got me going!

For thirty odd years -
from as many
different pulpits -
Father misled his flock,
the diocese never seeking
to defrock
a purveyor of pure evil.

and...

Hundreds of times
his busy hands
abandoned benediction
to grope inside vestments
tailored for children.

When I get riled up you know it's a good poem!


I don't care much for overdone alliterations because they often distract me from the stanza. But, here, you lay them out so well. I think placement is everything.

Sunday sermons
slithered past the guilty lips
of a sly serpent

A perfect ending.

Sorry again guys, trying to catch up.

Dear Jul, I love my little stories but have no patience to write actual prose, I am honored the progression works for you. I hope I didn't blow you too far away, you'd be sorely missed, love. For once I was able to not say something and still get it across, that makes me so happy. Thank you so much.


Dear Todd, Your kind words are much appreciated. For the most part, most of my work is in the narrative style, as I said to Jul, I am a storyteller at heart. Elated the repetition worked for you and perfect flow is a grand compliment, indeed. This is a touchy subject and it took a lot for me to even post it. I am Catholic and my faith remains sound. I do, however, dislike that the Church does not properly take care of business when it comes to pedophiles amongst their ranks, offenders should be punished by law, not moved from place to place to continue to do damage. But such crimes are the fault of the perpetrators, not the Church itself, although guilt does fall on the elders as far as enabling is concerned. Again, touchy subject, so I'll leave it at that. I'm glad you were able to find some good in this despite its distasteful theme.


Dear OD, Thank you so much for telling me about lingering images, that has to be one of the finest things I've been told. I love you for mentioning the second to last stanza. I deliberately left it open to individual interpretation, did Pastor lie to protect Mother Church or Greg McGee? I know the answer as I wrote it. The piece would definitely leave a nasty taste without it. Again, touchy subject, sometimes I think it would be best if celibacy was not enforced upon the clergy.


Dear Cin, Thank you, love. This was one that got washed away in the cleanse, in copying my old work, I found quite a few pieces I still want reflected in my coffer, with some editing, of course, I was still pretty clueless when they were written. Sometimes I wonder how I even posted them at all, it's amazing what one learns in the space of eighteen months. lol.


Dear Law, Seems we feel the same, although my experience with the Church has always been good unlike yours, which was...well, nasty. Glad the alliterations weren't overdone, you know sometimes my hand is too heavy and I sabotage my stuff. As for riling, I'll take that any day, if we can evoke, be it good or bad, it means we've done something right.


My sincere thanks to you all for sharing your precious time with me and for replying to such a controversial piece.

All my best,
Lisa

Bravo! Guiltily satisfying, but satisfying nonetheless! Well done. This topic needs more attention. Thanks for sharing!