Thread: House of Mirrors

One of my most recent poems. A lot of neat little things going on here, so it was a fun piece to write. Enjoy!

House of Mirrors

I made a dotted line over my body in circles. I
like it slow when it hurts the most. You know where to tear, and you like
to sink nails in my palm. Carve your name, stamp my face. Somewhere to
belong on the outside. House of mirrors holding my eyes. And I belong
with so much glass, where I can crack. Chip me away with
your teeth, so I can watch. Leave my lips. I want to kiss your
face before I go. We can be everywhere if you leave your face
in love. Or fog up reflections. Paint yourself in
the breath of what’s left. So the
mirror is just a mirror.

Very interesting - lots going on here to be sure, I'm just not sure I understand them all - it may take some deciphering on your part.

Very creative, though, on many different levels.

To be honest, right away I was confused and distracted by the way the lines are laid out, starting with line one, with the "I" hanging off there by its lonesome, and for no apparent reason - not for the sake of a rhyme, or rhythm, or anything - it seems quite arbitrary, as do the other similar places where the sentence or phrase is split: "So the" (?)

I didn't particularly understand the "lines": "Carve your name, stamp my face" and "Chip me away with your teeth, so I can watch" - these certainly evoke strong images, but surreal and devoid of linear meaning - however, this may have been your intent.

Very vivid stuff here - Reading this piece was like trying to pick up splinters of a broken mirror: feeling like it all fits together somehow, catching glimpses here and there of reflected images, and finding that some of the edges are very sharp.

---todd

Lots of gory gruesome stuff going on here, Angel dear, a lady after my own heart. I have to agree with Todd regarding the breaks. I've broken it, NOT AS A SUGGESTED EDIT, but to try to fully grasp what's going on, my mind needs things mapped out a certain way or else it chases its own tail, these breaks are for me only:


I made a dotted line
over my body in circles.
I like it slow
when it hurts the most.
You know where to tear,
and you like to sink nails
in my palm.

Carve your name,
stamp my face.
Somewhere
to belong
on the outside.
House of mirrors
holding my eyes.
And I belong
with so much glass,
where I can crack.
Chip me away
with your teeth,
so I can watch.

Leave my lips.
I want to kiss
your face
before I go.
We can be everywhere
if you leave your face
in love.

Or fog up reflections.
Paint yourself
in the breath of what’s left.
So the mirror
is just a mirror.

I love Todd's thoughts regarding having to piece it together like a fractured mirror. Very astute observation. Okay, obviously someone is a masochist (possibly a cutter, also) who has a willing playmate. The dotted line (in marker or such) may be a pattern to be followed by the playmate or actual self inflicted wounds. I like that it can be either. The nails sinking in palms, fingernails or iron nails, again, I like it can go either way.

I'm thinking they are surrounded by mirrors, so the they can watch. "Where I can crack" works very well for me. "Leave my lips" intact, yes? for a final kiss? "We can be everywhere" mirrors reflecting mirrors, images go on forever. I like the fogging up so that the mirror is just a mirror. But those last lines lead me to believe I'm so way off base, I'll be playing first for the Mets in a couple of weeks.

Now, my dear, please keep in mind that I stink at interpretation. I have taken this literally, as is my wont, but I may have missed the mark entirely in doing so. My confusion has me deeply intrigued. So, as we say around here 'Splain me, Lucy, pleeeaasee. I've a bathroom to finish renovating, but I'll be popping on and off. And, again, the restructuring is meant only for me, but I left it for anyone else who may find it helpful. I'll be back, can't say if that's a threat or a promise, lol.

Best,
Lisa

Thanks for the great replies, guys!

Regarding the line breaks: There is a very specfic reason for this. Basically, look where the line begins and where it ends. This poem has a lot to do with reflections. What is desired and what is there. (And yes, the masochism. Ha, ha. But no so much in the literal sense.) Anyway, that is what the line breaks are respresenting. The contrast between perfection and insanity. And there's also a message there. A line within the lines.

Hopefully that may help a little. Don't want to explain too much. Then it just wouldn't be any fun.

The lines begin and end with the same word, a reflection of each other. Cool. Still working on the rest, kinda hard with all this hammering going on. lol.

I'm not sure that the subject in the poem has a partner in crime, or a "real" one anyway. It seems to me like the other is simply the reflection in the mirror or that the subject is the reflection what makes it tough is that there is a certain level of activity ascribed to both participants, if one was completely passive then this reading might be easier. I might be waay off since "I like to belong with your face in the mirror" is leading me in that direction and I'm not sure if thats random or specifically ordered. Cant wait to have it all explained -Ian

Originally Posted by ISeeBull

I'm not sure that the subject in the poem has a partner in crime, or a "real" one anyway. It seems to me like the other is simply the reflection in the mirror or that the subject is the reflection what makes it tough is that there is a certain level of activity ascribed to both participants, if one was completely passive then this reading might be easier. I might be waay off since "I like to belong with your face in the mirror" is leading me in that direction and I'm not sure if thats random or specifically ordered. Cant wait to have it all explained -Ian

"I like to belong with your face in the mirror" was definitely not random. And so glad you noticed it!

I'll write an explanation tonight, since my baby has a doctor's appointment this afternoon.

Thanks guys!

Okay. Explanation time!

First of all, this poem is about one person. The two sides to this are what's inside and outside the mirror. The outside is what the reality is. Who this person is. What they really look like. The inside is what this person desires to become. So "I like to belong with your face in the mirror" (the hidden line) is basically the narrator saying, "I want to be this 'perfect' person." The line breaks, as noted above, are reflections of each other. One side is the perfect side. The line down the poem is straight. The reflection is broken and twisted, but it's still saying the same thing.

The poem starts off with the "dotted line." Sort of like a "cut here" line. The narrator trying to make--we'll say her--self perfect. She wants to feel herself changing and being renewed (I like it slow, nails in my palms). She wants this "perfect self" to make her just that (carve your name, stamp my face). She feels like an outcast the way she is and wants to fit in somewhere besides her own head (somewhere to belong on the outside). Then the perfect self begins to consume all her thoughts (house of mirrors holding my eyes). And she begins to become fragile and is getting ready to give up (And I belong with so much glass, where I can crack. Chip me away with your teeth, so I can watch.).

The next part is her desire to love this "perfect self" that is consuming her before she makes the decision to let go. (Leave my lips. I want to kiss your face before I go. We can be everywhere if you leave your face in love.). And then this: "Or fog up reflections. Paint yourself in the breath of what’s left. So the mirror is just a mirror." This is her casting away this image or "fogging it up." And painting her true reflection. And realizing that it's okay to be who she is.

Hope that helps! Thanks for reading, guys!

Thanks alot for the explanation. I felt as if it was about an internal conflict in the mirror but I wasn't seeing it quite the way you've presented it. I really like the way the poem moves through a deeply meaningful potential narrative in the last few lines using very common, everyday images (like fogging up a mirror).

-Ian

Well, well, well, egg on my face (see I told you so, I signed a contract with the Mets just this morning) I do believe I have a bird's nest attached to my neck. I knew the literal approach was a poor one in this case, although it worked really well for me that way also. A fine piece with the explanation, Angel, and I think I'll avoid the abstract until all my other stuff is back to normal and I have the time to devote to delving as I prefer. Why I tried to tackle this with half a brain is beyond me. I will say that I love the way your mind works, which is one of the greatest compliments I can offer. On a more serious note, I pray your son's appointment was a routine check up and that he is well. Sorry for butchering your piece so, love.

Best,
Lisa

Very big compliment. Thank you very much. And no worries. I'm just flattered anyone is actually taking the time to look at this.

Oh, and his appointment was fine. Just a routine appointment for shots, etc. He was brave. He only cried a little.

I must admit, upon reading this the first time I was convinced it was between two different people: one with a Napoleon complex and another with a serious lack of self-esteem...