Thread: Swilling the Dragon

Gasoline fumes singe his nose,
the traffic sounds all around,
and the soft snick, snick, snicker
of the pump,
as it fills his tank,
and drains his wallet.

He smooths his hand over the sleek flank of his Charger;
the finest destrier Dodge ever made.

He sees her across the tarmac,
sizing him up, planning her approach.
One glance at her face confirms it;
sucked in cheeks, toothless jaw,
eyes, gaslight blue with intent.

A methological creature,
in these days of whine and poses,
her kind roam the parking lots,
often in pairs.

He prepares to do battle.

A flick of wrist lowers
the Ray-Ban visor of his helm.
He shifts his Holy Lance
to the corner of his mouth
and lifts his invisible shield,
emblazoned with a bright red stop sign,
and the words: Here be dragons.

Her step falters, her eyes dim,
she acknowledges his victory.
“I wasn’t going to ask for money,
I only wanted to know the time.”

They both know it’s a lie.

She turns to leave, seek new prey,
he hears; “We’re all just people,
we’re all the same…”
And for a moment, watching her go,
he could swear he caught the acrid scent
of fire
and brimstone.

Uhm, is the dragon here a plane?

This was an engrossing read - and the picture painted in my mind upon first reading was of a trucker being approaching by prostitutes ("lot-lizards"), also meth drug users - but then when I look back, he was filling up his Dodge Charger, not his semi - and I'm not sure about the "here be dragons" - I still feel certain about the druggie hookers
- shifting the Holy Lance, being his cigarette I assume, is a brilliant image -

^ Oh. It's a pickup. I see.

Hey Fuhrer, thanks for commenting here. The Dodge Charger is a pretty sporty car, in fact, the police in many states have replaced their cars with the new Charger. I wanted one myself, for a while, but decided I really didn't need all that power.

toddm, yes she is a meth addict. They are all over here, (California) and these days it's not unusual to be approached several times a day in different parking lots, for money. Though I've never been offered any services in return, I know they resort to that method also.
The term "here be dragons," is a reference to the old maps where they would put sea serpants or dragons on the unknown areas of the map to denote danger. You're right about the Holy Lance, I believe there is actually a cigar that is called Holy Lance.
Thank you so much for your comments.

Creates a nice picture. Liked it. Also, I googled "Dodge Charger".

Thanks candid petunia.

A methological creature,

Methadone addict. A brilliant play on words, Cindy!

Thanks Laurie.

Fantastic piece Gumby. I love how you seamlessly incorporated mythological and modern imagery. The feudal references were a nice touch; a wary knight raising his guard against a threatening beast. One contextual crit I have is that the junkie did not seem as threatening as your description of her might suggest, particularly in the metaphors you employ. Than again, maybe that was your point, to highlight the dissonance which often exists between reality and perception, the way peoples image of themselves and others informs the way they misguidedly relate. The man considers himself (quixotically in the most fundemental sense of the word) a knight; the addict considers herself a human. In that vein, I found this especially touching:

She turns to leave, seek new prey,
he hears; “We’re all just people,
we’re all the same…” Side note: you used the ellipses here to great effect. The way she trails off effectively inspires pity in the reader.

Those lines wring sympathy from me as a reader, but the tone is inconsistent. I find it difficult to reconcile the two contradictory tendencies of the poem; it creates empathy for the humanity of, and callous detachment from, the same character. Sometimes it even seems to veer towards disgust. Something to consider. I am interested in hearing your thoughts.

In any case it's some very clever writing. Enjoyed.

Thank you, Edge, for your thoughts here. This is based on something that actually happened to me, and the fact that I had many mixed feelings about the whole thing came through in the writing and you picked up on it. All of the feelings you mentioned, I experienced. I didn't want to focus on the sympathy or the disgust, or the callous indifference, because I didn't honestly feel one emotion stronger than the other. Though, I do see what you mean in that the poem has conflicting emotions. Which may not be the best way to approach poetry, but do we really only feel one way about any subject? My husband gets mad at me sometimes because I can almost always see the other guys point of view, even if it isn't mine. He's the type who feels that there is only one way that is right so that makes the others wrong. I think that there are many valid points of view on any subject, though I may not agree with them. Don't know what that makes me.

I did intentionally not make the junkie seem dangerous, to show how we can overreact to them, sometimes. Not that they can't be dangerous, but most of them I've come across where I live are just looking for a handout to get their stuff.
I'm glad you enjoyed the mythological references, they were fun to think up. Thank you again Edge.

I like it. Had to look up "destrier" though.

good work!

Thanks, Kenny. Yes, it's not a common word anymore.

Ah, my dear Cindy, a wee bit different than usual, but equally excellent. I echo Edge because I just can't articulate half as well as he can. Wonderful use of metaphor and the cleverness throughout made me giddy. Methological and Holy Lance are both sheer genius. As Edge noted, your use of the elipsis works extremely well to garner pity. Glad you explained "Here be dragons", although it was familiar to me for some reason, obviously, I came across it somewhere, I would have had to look it up. Loved your use of fire and brimstone, I couldn't help but wonder which one of them was wearing its perfume, what a great way to wrap up. Excellent work, love.

Me

Thanks Lisa, and I'm glad you picked up on the question at the end, of just who was inspiring that aroma. Fire and brimstone is not only associated with dragons, there is the connection to old Scratch and the anger of the Man Upstairs too.