Thread: Sunny Day

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Really lovely, celebrating all of life's pleasures. I like the euphoria in your words.

at sight of children play, (make it playing or at play)

embrace(s)

I like your writing style, it flows nicely.

While, the sun embrace their hearts.

you don't need the comma.

Very positive and uplifting piece - full of youth and simple happiness.
Here are few of my suggestions, take or leave any or all of them:

Originally Posted by asahmed1

Shinning light in the sky. "Shining"
Blue birds sing, & fly by. why "&" here and not in line 7? also, no comma

Parent's hearts, filled with love "The hearts of parents" may work better
at sight of children play, "at the sight" would match the next line - delete "play" as "playing" is the next word- maybe add "the" before children
playing in the field of roses.

Running through golden trails
with sea doves, and ocean plains. great pair of lines

While, the sun embrace their hearts no need for comma here - also "embraces"
happliness, blossoms in their souls. "happiness" and no comma - also "blooms might be better than "blossums" here
Excitement enters their hearts
Joyous occasion to be.These final lines could be improved perhaps by becoming: "An excitement enters their hearts
at the joyous occasion to be."

Great work - keep writing!