Thread: My First Poem :))

I wrote this when boredom stroke on our Chem lecture.

Gonna ditch classes
Don't listen to lessons
But not a moron.
Teacher discusses percent by volume
Some don't listen to her
Some are pseudo listeners.
Lethargic eyes
Wanna go home now
But I don't know how.
Stocked on the other side
Staring on the white board
Don't wanna study anymore.
Thinking of the bloody exams
Study later or study now.

For a first poem, this is good. It's actually funny.

But I highly suggest you reconsider this and have it become a song instead. It's perfect as a song. The inside rhymes and the pseudo-rhymes work well. Add some notes here and there, or perhaps just a simple beat, then you have yourself some good music.

Teacher discusses percent by volume
Some don't listen to her
Some are pseudo listeners.

I like this line. ^_^

Seriously: turning this into a song will work very perfectly. I can already hear it.

I definitely like the sarcastic tone of this poem. But the "but not a moron" line doesn't quite fit. I'm not sure what it could be replaced with. Generally, "but" isn't the best first word in a line of poetry.