Thread: Love Nightmares- (Language)

Where is that internally beautiful girl I once knew?
I know she was never perfect.
I know she lied to my soul
And I know she knows she broke my heart
She treated boys like her little pets
But despite it all I saw something in her I’ve never seen in anyone
I saw a heart that was pure and true
Maybe tainted by an evil world that wanted to suck her blood
And because of this
Despite all the rejection she forced on me
I couldn’t let myself give up on her
God doesn’t make many like her
And I just wish she was real to me again
And not a fantasy that I don’t really want
Life is tough
And she said herself nothing worth having comes easy
Of course I believed her, I wanted to
But now that she showed me the burning bush Moses talked to
And then told me to go back to the pharaohs
I have way too much damn doubt
And I demand some answers
Does she know she can be responsible for another life?
I know that wasn’t something she asked for
But her God like love was instrumental in me not listening to her orders to go back to the pharaohs
And I’d like to feel all my friends were right for telling me about her being a selfish little bitch, forever undeserving of real love
But was this really such a mortal mistake?
I was godforsaken and condemned to a self imposed death anyway
But instead I chose to follow her Moses through a fucking desert
Everyday we find the manna
We are safe
But we have been going around in circles like the wheels of a machine for far too long
After 30 years this symphony is getting really old
So forgive me if I threaten that if someday we actually reconcile
And then the shit hits the fan
And we just cannot be together anymore
I will leave
It’s the only decent thing to do
As wrong as it may sound
A fantasy realized, obtained, and actually loved, is one that was thought through to what could be the bitter end
So I sit idly on the bench
While I wonder if she will ever play ball
But the sands of time are running low
And I WILL quit the team
Because I have a low tolerance for insolence
They may call me Sir
But in my heart I just want to be there for her
And if this is nothing but the nightmare patch in the tapestry of life
It’s about time to say this patch is complete
Enter a new phase
One which I said I would never take to
But like they say
To thy own self be true
And sitting on Gods right hand is for the birds